Really enjoyed this update. Can’t wait for the angsty reunion with Caroline with the option to have feeling for her which my mc does. Can’t wait for the reunion.
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Also I’m glad Mila will feature more into the story, feel bad for her and hopefully we can help her move on or if we aren’t romancing Caroline maybe help them get back together if the story permits such a thing.
Also the mc hasn’t had proper feelings for someone before then I can understand why it might seem toxic or possessive of them being upset or immature about Caroline and Mila but then again the mc seemingly hasn’t had a proper parental figure in their life until Diane, and even then the mc is too scared to tell Diane. So he has no one to help point out their flaws and help them work through it.
Also on the teasing thing I know me and my mates sometimes do it if our friend is being extra around their crush. Guess it depends on your group dynamic. Me and my mates give each other shit over such things but it’s done in jest
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Agreed on the teasing thing, my friends will (very lightly) tease each other if they have a significant other/crush, and it’s also something my siblings and I have also done plenty of times when we were around the age of the MC and Caroline here, and I think that MC’s relationship with Caroline is more reflective of siblings than friends (at least in my playthrough).
In terms of adding options about the MC’s background - yes, please!!! Even if it doesn’t factor too much into the stats, I really appreciate it when I as a reader am able to make a choice like that which helps me to develop the MC more fully, in terms of motivations, fears, why they react certain ways to certain things, etc. And also flavor text reflective of those background choices would be very nice (but I’m not sure if that’s an annoyance to code or add in or anything, I know nothing about coding)
Also I feel like after Caroline disappeared, there wasn’t much of a change regarding the MC’s relationship with Diane, but I personally thought Diane was an asshole to Caroline and that my MC would have some amount of resentment towards Diane for how she berated Caroline and that this resentment would certainly grow after Caroline has disappeared and Diane has started to kind of retract inwards/distance herself emotionally.
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My new review of the new version
Me: Is good 
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I have too many emotions about this. Especially the part where I think Fidelis was struggling to buy chocolate 
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Hi everyone 
long time no post! I’m just dropping a quick to officially announce a small update from April, and to let you all know that a second small revision-y type update is coming this weekend!
I also have drawn some further RO profiles for anyone who would be interested in how I envision them. 
I hope to make a dev blog for this game this weekend!
Fidelis Mariamsun:
Helga:
Fem!Shiloh:
Anu Mariamsun:
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I fell in love with your WiP a while back, and find myself coming back every now and then to read it again. And I’m glad to hear things are going well for you, and wish you all the best going forward with this, excited still to see where it goes 
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Hey folks, it took me a bit longer than I anticipated, but I did manage to get a tumblr blog up! Link here: Invicto (tumblr.com) and in the main page! It currently has a character page, premise page, a useful lexicon for the language used in the game’s universe, and a page concerning future updates and plans! Anything you want to ask, request, or want me to know about, don’t hesitate to send in an ask just read the blog laws first. <3
edit: Oh, and before I forget-- I added another little nugget of mystery to the latest chapter about a week ago, and trimmed up some of the prose. Not a big update, but thought I’d let y’all know 
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I very much enjoy stories with little/big sister interaction, and though it was shortlived, it was still sweet all the same.
Tell me there will be more in the future, that it isn’t over…
Actualy, don’t, don’t spoil it, let me hang on this thin thread of hope instead.
P.S: I would like to know if you are still gonna keep this thread updated since I don’t have a tumblr account nor browse that website.
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Hi all! Wanted to check in. My full time position will be ending soon and I will have more time to work on this demo in about a month! Here’s a teaser from Chapter 5; you will be able to choose between having a peek into the memories of some prominent Leivyans of the past in return for what you told the child about your own history-- or you can refuse and get on with remembering your initial introduction to the Leivy!
Sneak peek into Chapter 5:
P.S: I would like to know if you are still gonna keep this thread updated since I don’t have a tumblr account nor browse that website.
Yes, ofc I’m still going to keep up on here. I’m not a huge tumblr user either so I’ll probably feel most comfortable using both of these sites
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Hey there. First of all the story is interesting but what I would change is more choices of grieving. Its not enough for me atleast. The MC handles it too well. But its just my opinion of course. If it clashes with how you have the story in mind then you can just ignore it. Good luck with the story and have fun writing it! 
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Yeah that child is definitely giving off creepy vibes and it’s not like u have any real choices in that little spoiler.
Update: I’ve finished with one half of the chapter. Currently it’s just one route that I’ve done (there are going to be two main branches for this chapter) but just wrote a reunion scene!! Can’t wait to share
If anyone wants to give feedback, I’m curious: what would your MC’s response be to first seeing Caroline again, now in the context of the Leivy?
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When meeting Caroline again? Too many emotions at once and wouldn’t know how to express them (based on personality) (also depressed since the disappearance)
So a scenario similar to John Watson and Sherlock haha. Confusion and anger
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“Yeah great you’re alive and everything, now send me back.”
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My MC would be relieved to see that she’s okay, but angry at all the grief her disappearance has caused for him and his Mom.
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Yup! I really hope MC get to chew her out for all that shit before confessing their real feelings
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I’m so happy to hear back from you!
First thing that comes into mind is immense relief, relief that she is still alive. Years of being gnawed by the guilt from failing to save Caroline that day on the beach. Probably would give her a tight tight teary hug.
Once that feeling is subsided, MC will chew her out like hell for not leaving any sign or even trying to contact MC or Diane to at least let them know she alright in someway. Hopefully, MC could ask her this question: “What are they to her then?”
And “what are they to her now?” Cause I think by now, MC should have some pessimistic inkling even if they were not given the full context of what they had stumbled themselves into, that they are just a speck in the grander scheme of things in regards to the Leivy.
Maybe it’s just my MC, but in someway they knew that it’s futile to bring her back. Since there so much things tying Caroline there to the Leivy. She could be great there, not some “wild child”. After all she is surrounded by important looking people, in luxurious clothings and power(?) that the MC as someone orphaned who was abandoned in the fire station could barely even understand, or can ever imagine.
( Anyways i’m all for the angst in this game.)
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Very good game, color me surprised. Because the story had me hooked from the get go till the end.
It has just the right amount of angst, which is perfect.
In a nutshell? I play sappy MC lol
They better have a mop wherever she is…cause I ain’t cleaning! 
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