What's the main difference between friendship and QPR?

I’d like to write Qpr “romance” routes for a few of my ROs, so it’d be really helpful to know if QPR and close friendships have any clear distinctions like romantic/sexual/platonic relationships do?
Any input is really appreciated, thank you! :heart:

Queen’s Park Rangers?

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Assuming you aren’t joking, she’s referring to queer platonic relationships. I’d expand upon that but I’m not experienced and don’t trust whatever stray thoughts are in my head (I barely have experience with normal friendships as is and I’m so horrifically lacking in any sort of understanding for any of it).

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Haha, no I was thinking more Queer-platonic relationships, although now I kinda wanna add that bit of world play into the story at some point :sweat_smile: :joy:

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Let me ask you this: Do you fuck your friend? Do you kiss your best friend on the Lips, and invite them to bed? Do you call your friend a ‘Good Hook up’ and call them whenever you need Sex?

If you answered NO, then Gay (I hate the word Queer), is no different than Hetero. Something Platonic is just that…Platonic. We are friends, nothing more. Doesn’t matter the orientation, size of the body, height, weight, or skin color…

Romantic = Has feeling, seeking romance and all that jazz, be Gf/Gf or Bf-bf
Sexual = Just sex, no strings attached (Usually anyway)
Platonic = Just friendship.

Close friendship= can be a best friend, or Best friend forever, depending on the individual.

Those are your generic ones. The rest depends again on the Individual. Some peoples can want Romance but no Sex.

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I was more so looking for what’s (if any) differences there are between platonic (friends/close friends etc) and platonic + (QPR, which as I understand is still very much platonic, but closer to a traditionally romantic/sexual relationship in it’s dynamics).

Do you have to announce it? Discuss it? Is it silent and just there?
Like, for example, I’ve never sat down w a friend and went: “…so what are we?” (Whereas in romantic/sexual arraignments it’s 1. Fairly common and 2. Sometimes even expected).

Anyways, sorry, I’m getting off track a bit.
Thanks for explaining what’s the difference between platonic/romantic/sexual relationships by the way :grinning:

I think it just there most often.

Ask yourself: Did you announce it?

Often peoples will speak of the relationship with others than with the concerned person directly. ‘Oh yeah, me and X are…friend I guess? We know each others for like 2 years. yeah, we are friends’.

I don’t know what is platonic+ ?

Platonic+ is what I just called QPR (Queer Platonic Relationships) to illustrate my point, since I think you misunderstood me haha :sweat_smile:; DLC for platonic relationships. Idk, like the only other example that comes to mind is Lavender marriages…?

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Let’s be honest, your question isn’t clear at all.

If you are the one writing these romances then it is up to you to clarify it to your readers.

And that come in the form of choices you give the players.

So, up to you?

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Okay, yeah, thanks for trying to help anyways :grinning: :heart:

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As @E_RedMark says, this is really dependent on your world building and what is considered to be platonic within your world-building.

Historically, Boston or Wellesley marriages were a thing.

Just in case someone wants to know what these relationships were:

A “Boston marriage” was, historically, the cohabitation of two wealthy women, independent of financial support from a man. The term is said to have been in use in New England in the late 19th/early 20th century. Some of these relationships were romantic in nature and might now be considered a lesbian relationship; others were not.

Modern examples include the various “partnership” laws passed so same-sex partners may have some of the same rights as those who were married without actually being married.

BTW; Platonic means: not sexual in nature … so love can be platonic and these relationships can be anything from acquaintances to romantic love.

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Did they have to be wealthy to be called ‘Boston Marriage’?

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The term came “Boston Marriage” came from a book that was popular at the time and it described what was happening at that moment.

Both Boston marriage and Wellesley marriage were expanded to be more inclusive as society adopted the terms.

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I don’t think the question is unclear - it makes sense that you want the relationships to feel true to life and to the characters.

I see queerplatonic relationships as something different to close friendship - in some cases a “platonic life partner” type of relationship where people may live together and be in each others’ lives, perhaps in in a similar way to romantic partners, but with different (nonromantic) feelings. I know of people who have had ceremonies to celebrate a platonic relationship. There are plenty of ways to describe such relationships but i think the key is to think about your characters and how they would think about the feelings and interactions involved.

Note - I haven’t had a relationship like this so am not an authority in any way :sweat_smile: I defer to people who have experience in this area! And experiences will vary in as many ways as alloromantic relationships do.

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I love the term…Boston Marriage. And of course, its not related to Boston city even if its the only city in the US where I heard good things right? Lol

This stuff needs to come back! Boston Marriage! Love it!

This question should best be answered by aro and ace-aro folks.

Also, if you write something like it, I’d suggest making sure that the player can choose if they want their MC’s QPR to include sex or other forms of physical affection/closeness.

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That is a very good point, thank you :grinning:

You say that, but I think your game had the only QPR option I’ve ever encountered under COG labels , lmao :joy: so at the very least you had some experience writing one.

But yeah, I guess like every relationship (het or not; allo or not), it’s different person to person :sweat_smile:

I have one NPC-NPC relationship that I believe goes on that vein (although they don’t live together) and I have been wondering what to call it myself.

So based on the information you give me, Shii and Mariko from the manga “My Broken Mariko” (a short tragedy and psychological manga about dealing with the grief of losing someone you love) may be the example for QPR.

  • Mariko said she would commit suicide if Shii has a boyfriend because she was afraid Shii will love someone more than her and abandon her. (please don’t blame her, her life was hell and Shii was the only one she could lean on)
  • Shii said she would sacrifice her life for Mariko.
  • Both of them said the other is their most precious.
  • They had the plan to live together, this may sound normal but if you read it it feels like a married couple living together for the rest of their lives.
  • When Mariko died, Shii was going to commit suicide.

To your question, normal friendship wouldn’t do anything similar above, my friend and pretty much anyone I know who read the manga agree that they should marry already. But that’s just my assumption, if I’m wrong please correct me.