Folks who are interested in material like this may also want to review existing material we’ve published, including our guide to outlining a game before you start and our guide to writing a full game.
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This is an amazing resource for Choicescript writers! I agree with pretty much every point you’ve put forth, and it corresponds to my own personal research almost exactly. I did a LOT of reading as I was putting together Werewolves 1 and 2, and deciding what did and didn’t work. To this day (as I write Vampire: Parliament of Knives) I do a weekly roundup of new reviews and read them, particularly those for Night Road, including Reddit posts, forum posts, etc…
I think one of the most important things a Choicescript author can do while writing or designing their game is to go back to every single CoG or HG and read the reviews on Google Play. Spend hours on it. Take notes about common themes regarding what players like and dislike on a consistent basis. If my sales are anything to go by, Google Play is where the majority of your sales will come from (although that’s slowly being edged out by the omnibus which unfortunately doesn’t have written reviews.) That said, most of the important items are listed here which is what makes this post such a valuable resource.
This. SO much this. I’ve been doing this a lot in Parliament of Knives because the game is heavily political with a lot of characters. There are many conversations where I’ll have several responses that exist almost entirely to remind the player of what they’ve already learned so they don’t always have to keep everything straight in their heads. This is especially true for the players you’ve mentioned who (inexplicably) skim the book but read the choices. The key, of course, is to do this in a way that doesn’t sound pandering or redundant. Hopefully I’ve hit the right sweet-spot.
Most important things in my opinion:
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Don’t make the game too hard. If I have to check my stats screen before every decision, I’m bored already. This is doubly true if I constantly feel like I’m failing even when I’m always checking the stats. This also tied into the confusing stats issue.
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Make sure the player feels like they have agency even when they don’t. This includes keeping the MC the MC.
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Exciting first chapter that pumps stats to a reasonable degree.
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Don’t have choices that reduce stats and make readers feel punished for their choices. No. Please stop. For the love of god.
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Make sure the advertising matches the game. When I was working on the advertising for Werewolves 2, I was extremely concerned that the advertising would make people think the game was entirely about the prison breakout. I had been watching the reviews for The Martian Job very carefully, because that game was billed as a heist when that was only the first third of the game, which caused a lot of bad reviews. Since the breakout was only the first third of Werewolves 2, I wanted to make absolutely sure that the advertising didn’t suggest that it was a ‘Werewolf Prison Break!’ to the exclusion of the rest of the game, while still advertising that aspect.
Anyway, sorry for going on and on. I really loved this post! I think your hard work will help a lot of new Choicescript authors miss common pitfalls and make the scene much better for it. Cheers!
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This is immensely helpful! I definitely need to edit my first chapters since I was still figuring things out then, and the stat balance is also something I struggle with.
Thank you so much for putting this together, I will probably reference it a lot!
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Although I don’t agree with everything, and I find some of your categorizations for games to be off, I think that this mostly hits the mark. It’s great to see the common threads among these games, as well as a highly useful warning of the pitfalls writing a COG poses.
I think it would be interesting if you were to go into Hosted Games to compares and contrast, though, because of the publication differences between the two (I would imagine there’s a lot more financial pressure in making a company game than a hosted one). I’ve seen some Hosted Games (Tin Star, Relics of the Lost Age, and Breach are three of my favorites, though there are many more quality works) that blow all but the absolute best Choice of Games out of the water.
Also, you go pretty hard on yourself for your game. If it’s any consolation, I thought for all of its flaws, it was a worthy game due to how unique the premise was and how it explored it. Maybe it just needs to become an annual tradition to boost sales around Christmas, or something.
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Thank you for sharing your research and organizing the data for the community to use, @Brian_Rushton.
I do think there is an elephant in the room which is not directly addressed – the tendency of authors/developers to ignore the “game” foundational concepts and theory as much as they can.
I would like your permission @Brian_Rushton to compile a feedback list/guidance based off your research – I feel that if authors/developers would direct their feedback into your data categories, it might help them focus-test better and perhaps give direction when needed.
Another area that I feel needs exploring, especially going forward from here is the impact and influence outside media and support services have on a game’s success. Patreon, Tumblr, Ko-Fi, Facebook, etc.
Perhaps staff will allow a new sub-forum to be created: Developmental Theory … I really wish there were more contributions of this nature being written.
Again, well done @Brian_Rushton, and it means a lot to have you contribute this way into the community.
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This is a big problem even for CoG’s editorial team. Sometimes authors just refuse to accept our feedback; sometimes they fail to understand it, or can’t figure out how to apply it in a general way. “We pointed out here in chapter 2 where it’s not clear what stat your testing; we need you to fix that issue in all of your choices.”
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This is a really good take. Great job, that’s definitely a must read for new - and some not so new - authors.
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Feel free to!
And I’d love to see more theory develop between authors. The monthly support threads are already great, and there has been some good analysis in the past. I definitely think that much of my theory is wrong and that the truth will only be discovered as more people put time in effort into figuring this stuff out.
I’d really love to see authors do more ‘postmortems’ describing their writing process, that kind of stuff is really helpful. And I bet there’s a lot out there already, I just need to look for them!
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Oh. I also think it is vital that you DO NOT PUSH YOUR PERSONAL AGENDA ON THE PLAYER. Whenever I feel that author don’t like my choice and try to virtually wag a finger on me, telling me that I’m a bad person for choosing this and my mc will suffer because I’m an immoral ass - that’s an immediate refund for me.
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This was a great read though I’m definitely biased because it confirmed most of my own personal biases (especially regarding player agency) but it’s good to be reminded not to ignore gameplay and your description of stat disease is super helpful 
Do you have a specific CoG or HG in mind 
? I’ve been playing a lot of WiP’s lately and most of the time instead of a lecture I don’t get a choice, and the author confirms somewhere that yes it’s because they don’t agree with it.
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Sorry, I worded that oddly. I meant that the sci-fi releases included both Nebula winners and the contest winner. Entries with obvious quality that have avoided major sales success because they were hobbled right out of the gate simply because they are not what readers want.
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I wouldn’t say that genre is the main reason the Nebula nominees aren’t as popular. The ones I’ve played favored, among other things, more in-depth character arcs over customization options for the MC, which seems to endear them to the SFWA, but not CoG’s customer base. The two groups just seem to have very different ideas of what constitutes a good IF game. For instance, I recognize at least three of the negative reviews above, each in a different section, as referring to one of the nominees.
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Absolutely 100% agree. I’ve read some CoGs and HGs that were very explicit about how the author wants you to behave, and every time you break out of that mold it feels like you’re being talked down to. That’s a big no in my opinion.
It’s a very easy trap to fall into as an author because we put so much of ourselves into our games. But we need to be able to write FOR other people when we’re allowing others to compose their own narrative.
It’s hard to remember that we’re not writing the story ourselves. We’re designing the framework so the player can write their own story. Once you get a handle on that, its easier to stop injecting personal bias into the narrative.
I’m certainly not perfect and I got a few fingers wagged at me for Werewolves 1 by players who wanted to be absolutely ruthless (there were several scenes where players who had killed ruthlessly would be haunted by the memory.) I still personally think that was the right call, since the MC is a teenager who has never killed anyone before, but I tried to let go of that perspective in Werewolves 2 and let things open up a bit more for less pacifistic players so they weren’t guilted by their choices. Live and learn!
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This is an excellent point (your entire summation is good, but this is a huge thing for me). I have seen good games screw this up, particularly with regard to emotions. They force feelings on the MC for whatever reason, but don’t allow the player any input into the situation. If nothing else, if authors insist on forcing an emotion on the MC, then at least present the MC with a choice as to why they feel that way (and kudos to any author with the balls to have one option as “I almost feel as if this feeling was forced down my throat, and it makes me mad/upset/homicidal/whatever”). This ties into giving the player (and MC) agency, in my opinion.
I honestly wish you could send this one line to every IF author there is. If something has to happen, it has to happen. That’s fine, but don’t write it as though the player chose it. And please, for the love of everything that’s good and holy, do not force emotions onto the MC. If you want a more set MC (for example, tortured), that’s fine. Show us why the MC is tortured. But leave it to us, and our MCs, how to deal with that torture and the type of person it shaped them into. That, as much as any stat, is one of the biggest necessities in a choice game. To me, anyway.
Great job on the essay, by the way!
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I’ve had that vibes with “Heroes of myth”, that’s why I have never finished it, despite an interesting premise.
Ugh. Mind to tell me few of them, please?
It will also be helpful to know how it looks like to stop his from happening in your own game.
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I would be all over that forum, I love talking game design and developement.
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Now that would be interesting reading. FH are one of the best hg structurally.
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@Brian_Rushton Thank you so much for that long and insightful post. It really helped me with my stats and some of my choices.
I’ve spent so much time and energy on my story arcs and hooks that I’ve neglected the stat and game design elements.
Also good for Dan to remind people of the fundamentals. It’s easy to lose track after you’ve been working on your lonesome for over a year.
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This is an amazing distillation, @Brian_Rushton, and while I’m not surprised at its thoroughness and depth given that it’s you, I am delighted at it.
Your point about the opening chapter reminded me of the effect of IntroComp on my own games back in the day. For those who aren’t familiar with that competition, you enter the intro and only the intro to a new game, and people give feedback not only on that intro but also if they would play the game that followed. It really sharpened my thinking on how to open a game, and some of Sam Ashwell’s points about game openings mirror yours (though not focused on CoG).
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what a fantastic essay! Thank you @Brian_Rushton for doing the work and compiling your thoughts in an excellent and readable way.
The first chapter really is vital. I agree with your friend’s guess that creators coming from a writing background, rather than a gaming background, are more likely to spend those first few pages on exposition. Literature-style exposition dump drives off players, but it’s such an easy trap to fall into.
More than anything, this thread is reminding me how important it is to bridge the gap between game designer and author. I think a lot of the themes you’re noticing occur when an author falls short on the game design or a game designer falls short on the writing.
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