Oh, I thought that was intentional, to show that character was really kind of losing the plot, if you know what I mean.
This was amazing! Love it and can’t wait for more!
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I could probably go on for ages gushing about how well the prose works for establishing the tragedy of Kennel’s situation, but I really have to compliment the way that Benny Hawkins is described to the reader. Reading over the story of Cork’s ball and the PE teacher left me with a genuinely emotional reaction by the end of the page line.
Needless to say I’m absolutely hooked by the premise, and I can’t wait to read more!
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Here’s a heads up
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Cheers for mentioning this, I’d have no idea otherwise. It was a great service when it was around.
I was planning on adding a small update by the end of the month where I’ll switch the link to a cogdemos one, though I’ll make a mental note to switch the current link if it’s not done by then.
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Who let the dogs out?
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Just a heads up that the link has been switched from dashingdon to cogdemos, so let me know if anything has gone horribly wrong in the switch. Unfortunately, I still need a bit more cooking time for the next small update but rest assured it’s chugging along. Should be about 10k words.
I’d like to thank everyone for their kind words again and for taking the time to visit this page. When the update rolls around I can finally get to replying to all the feedback and comments since the last time I did it. Rest assured I still appreciate and read them all, I just prefer responding to them in bulk rather than spamming this page with replies.
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There is one part of the game where you pick a drink. From the looks of the code, a variable is assigned to remember your choice, but it doesn’t seem to be used later. The game just generically refers to it as a beverage afterwards.
Maybe write some unique text depending on the drink you ordered. It’s flavor text, but it could make the writing slightly more immersive.
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the slapstick humor choice seems to be more of the universe helping you do the funny but im wondering if we can play up our own clumsiness a little sometimes. i kinda do that irl sometimes by harmlessly bumping into stuff or fumbling with objects that i know wont break if they fall
This reminds me of Violet Evergarden for some reason. I’m assuming it’s due to the setting of the story, just played with a bit.
The first chapter itself has a bit of a slow start but given the game’s context, I am more than happy to let the worldbuilding play out.
Will be happily waiting for the next update!!
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I really enjoy it so far, the humour element plays well against the grimness of the job and I’m so intrigued to see how it plays out
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It was me!
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Nice! Freedom for the doggos! 
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Update time!
It appears the dogs will be coming home at a much slower rate than I originally anticipated, but nevertheless, here’s a 10.5k-word update, bringing the whole demo up to 33k words, which encompasses the first interlude flashback between chapters. In this update, you will:
- Meet the RO, Daniel “Danny” Cork
- Get into an intense situation against a hostile aggressor
- Learn of a mysterious package heading towards Kennel Post Office
- Meet the RO, Samantha “Sammy” Arrow
- Talk way too much about the proboscis
You can find the link HERE.
The original link should also be fixed. As always, if there are any bugs, errors or otherwise, please let me know. Any other feedback is also appreciated. Thanks!
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Yay! I had fun with the updated bits! Mail tampering? For shame!
Really loved the update! This story is so great, can’t wait for more!
This is a beautiful story, and I’m hoping to see more of it as it develops!
I did see a minor typo in a choice where you’re talking with Harrow about the One’s Grace; one of the choices says ‘werid’, instead of presumably what’s meant to be ‘weird’.
Otherwise, I love how you’ve set things up, how you’re using motifs and metaphor (thirty-five grams, that letter weighs), and showing just as much as telling. And I’m curious how we go from the postie to saving people!
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borrowing a watered down curse from harrow, these characters are so gosh darn endearing. forget a bullet, i’d ‘tank’ a shell for em (hope we dont have to tho, and really hoping cork didnt foreshadow him taking any either, but hey if its really non fatal…)
also really ‘digging’ the humor choices. still the favorite part of ‘mine’. theyre all so great i cant just ‘pick’ one or two just to ‘axe’ the rest! tons of replay value, ill have to permutation combination playthroughs or at least save scums just to see em all!
So far this is interesting!
I must ask - is this inspired by Violet Evergarden? If not, I highly recommend that you watch it. The premise would… feel close.
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