You’re welcome! I’m glad it was useful and also encouraging!
I absolutely agree with what you wrote on Rue. My mc does have a decent moral compass, but to be clearly wanted and longed for in a way that almost feels unconditional to him (something he’d also would really want to believe) and he’s ready to give up and do just about anything to make that happen, having been so devoid of care/love in his life. Were he a more stable person with a less miserable life he might have thought it better to let Rue down gently for his own sake, but for the game’s mc/my mc, it’s a moth to a flame.
In that sense I can also see an mc who’s still pretty heavy into seeing the mob as his only choice, can be persuaded to become someone better for Rue/Prue, as well as a morally bankrupt character to exploit it (and perhaps even regret it later) and once again: I love that those options are there!
Btw are there things both of you are specifically looking for feedback wise? I’d be happy to help if I can.
I didn’t mean envying Paul’s life quite so literally, my mc is very different from Paul.
We can agree to disagree on the clothes. I don’t have issues with it bc in my opinion it’s solid from a narrative standpoint, it actually helps me be immersed in the story and want better things for mc. The pictures in my mind’s eye aren’t quite as damning as yours either, but that’s why it’s good to have different perspectives communicated to the authors.
I did try writing some flashbacks, but they didn’t really work, so I dropped the idea. I get your point though—Seb is also quite a difficult character to write.
Both of them fall into a pretty niche category: trauma, drug use, promiscuity. Sieun somehow holds it together, while Seb… not so much anymore. I have a feeling he’d flip me off for everything I’ve put him through.
Yeah, I pretty much agree with you.
Thanks so much for the long feedback. I really appreciate that.
I actually really like that comparison for Rue’s romance dynamic. He’s definitely the source of light, but he’s so vulnerable, especially with the influence MC can have over him.
Thank you! I’d love any feedback on the plot, pacing, characters, possible plot holes, or bugs, of course! Or just a quick message to say the game was engaging enough. It’s always appreciated.
