Yes, I’ll go through again and let you know. And just to clarify, it wasn’t that an error or anything popped up, it was just that I wasn’t sure if you actually COULD get your mojo to zero I’ll check again though @Gilbert_Gallo Hmm, I went through again and was able to fail this time. Odd, maybe I accidentally did the right thing before But yeah, unless there was some bug beforehand, the fail scene works lol
I uploaded chapter 7 today! You can FINALLY have a chance to kiss your RO (if you behaved properly you could also do more than that). Among the options: you can date a zombie, a gorilla, a venerable lady, or a dandy.
You will finally own a ship, and you could also drown at sea!
THANK YOU so much for the many feedbacks you are giving me (both publicly and privately).
Hey @Gilbert_Gallo! Glad to see this is still going strong, and to get a chance to catch up on it. Let’s see…
Feedback
-Is there a reason the character disposition bars are opposed pairs? I’m used to seeing them as a normal percentage. Also, I think it might be possible to remove the underscores in stats that have multiple words (such as Pieces_of_Eight) although I’m not precisely sure how.
-At the first point where I was prompted to spend time with one of the companions or not, I remember being a little put off by the narration kind of presenting it as “You don’t like any of these people and certainly don’t want to befriend them all, but maybe there’s one you tolerate more than the others?” But…I do like them! I’m generally okay with the more sassy/sarcastic narration, but I felt that was a little much, especially since I’d been playing a fairly friendly MC.
-After the duel with Flora, you referred to her as “passed away”, but she’s still alive. A person who has passed OUT is unconscious – a person who has passed AWAY is dead.
-I noticed that later chapters had a few more double spaced paragraphs, which I found a fair bit easier to read.
-I’m okay with Bernardo and Bruno’s dialogue changing format, but I’d say for consistency you should probably make the other character’s dialogue match it during those sections. For example…
Bruno: We talk like this!
“What do you mean?” Slash asks.
Bernardo: With our words after colons!
It might look better like…
Bruno: We talk like this!
Slash: What do you mean?
Bernardo: With our words after colons!
-I loved the circus section, it was a lot of fun in general but I also liked the idea of trying to find a way to play different scenarios based on each character’s strengths.
…Aaaand I ended up failing the memory challenge and my savegame refused to load, so I think that’s where I’m stopping for this time. Still having a great time, keep it up!
Wow! Thank you very much @Jayffel for your dedication!
I’m going to make all necessary adjustments asap.
Here are some (hopefully useful) explanations:
NPC opposed pairs. Actually, on the same line there’s the SAME NPC, not two different ones. The line represents your attitude toward that particular NPC. I wanted to give the reader the idea that your MC opinion about the NPCs might change. They start from a detached/unfriendly opinion (for example, the Crone) and could reach a friendly/lovely opinion (represented by their true name/stage name like Laura). Does this work? Or should I change something?
Thank you again very much for your time and dedication. Looking forward to hearing more from you
As far as the character meters go, I understood that each bar is referring to the same person, I just find the opposed pair method of showing this to be more confusing than a plain percentage. I…don’t really know how to describe why. I guess my brain reads it and wants to interpret it as telling me two different things, even though I know it’s only telling me one, so I get kind of stuck for a second trying to decide if I’m missing something.
That said, I do like the idea of the way your character identifies the others in their head changing over the story, and I don’t have any ideas for how to make that work better…In any case, it’s certainly not a huge issue for me, just something I thought I’d ask about. If it works for you, then it works for me.
I really appreciate all your feedback, and now I definitely see your point. I’ll think it over a couple of days and then decide what to do with the opposing characters’ bar.