Prudence is mostly a brown dog, just with a “reddish tinge” - ie., light brownish gold, not full on red. But you’re right, I’ll make it more explicitly muddy. Thanks!
My first playthrough, I tried to do the right thing and give everyone the benefit of the doubt. This resulted in: my scooter being stolen, getting tricked into a more expensive office, and paying the booth guy a loooot of money. My second playthrough I did the opposite and ended up a lot better off. This game is teaching me to distrust everyone, hahaha! PARANOIA!
Did anyone else notice that Chiaro agrees with whatever you say? I think he’s evil.
Also, saw a reference to an emubot up there. Did I miss something or how do I get that?
yes there is a emu girl that ask you for retrieve a dog if you have good observation skills you discover it when confront her about how smart she appears for her age. Also my natural evilness make me obtain a good success in a harsh futuristic setting also Chiaro its clearly someone sending to control you probably to later on use you my natural paranoia tell me than his recommend for q cheap office suggest the fact the to girls enter a deliberate set up like my cute robot seem to imply.
that’s adventure its clearly amazing and thrilling im eager to see if im right or not
I want to be able to upgrade my robot that would be kool
I expect more Golden/Roarin’ 20s lingo. I loved the addition of “gumshoe”. This feels like a true Noir game. It has a delicious style that grabs the reader/player’s attention right away. It also feels quite original, and that is lovely.
I cannot wait to play the next chapter or the full game.
Oh thanks, I missed that. Also your conspiracy theory is pretty crazy, haha! I was pretty sure Humphrey’s speech at the end was just Played For Laughs but maybe it was meant to be ironic, who knows.
So was I the only one to screw over the cop (Ethan I think)?
i capture the girl without doubt i believe she was a baby face thief i don’t know why but i proud of my observation skills
and about my theory probably you are right but noir stories are known for set ups and treason the poor detectives just saying
Okay, so your opening monologue is probably my favorite piece of writing in the history of choicescript. “Mobs selling custom shoes down by the docks” is just a great line. Definitely looks promising.
My one gripe would be the way stats are handled. Observation seems to more properly be an intellect stat, and the choice of professions doesn’t seem to provide enough options in terms of stat distribution.
Well, the asking for payment was disingenuous, “Oh I’m super busy blah blah blah,” I’d have much preferred a more straight forward “How much was my predecessor charging you?” or something like that.
As for Chloe, I finally chose the profession for my PI to figure out what I figured out already because it was obvious from what she said what she is. It’s not a matter of a sherlock scan, it’s basic logic.
@sesquipedalian
Nurturing a mindset of distrust and egocentrism is intentional on my part, so that’s good news! I wouldn’t describe Chiarro as “evil” (what exactly he is, I won’t say yet); none of the characters in the game will be purely evil or good, so much as driven by selfishness or their own ideals. In a lot of games I’ve played, there are two dichotomies of Good or Bad, but I find a spectrum far more compelling. On the flipside, I also want to lend some weight to the MC’s moral choices, because most of the time you don’t suffer any consequences for being noble or heroic or self-sacrificing. Whereas if you keep it up in Oblique, you’ll likely go into debt. Ex: if you choose to help Jane for free, you really do help her for free - there isn’t a special pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Oh, and it’s worth noting that, while Chiarro screws you over in most instances, if you happen to say the right thing (it’s counter-intuitive) he actually ends up helping you.
@MaraJade
Your choices are pretty interesting! I wouldn’t have expected most people on their first playthrough to see the woman for what she was.
@VoodooDolly
Thanks! Most of the 21st century references are spewed by Humphrey, so I’ll make sure he gets a healthy load of some good old Roaring Twenties fever.
@stsword
That’s a valid point. I’ll fix it to be more neutral in the next update. Re: Chloe, I’ll think about either lowering the statcheck or making the clues more subtle.
@Wonderboy
Thank you, that’s high praise. You’re completely right about stats, actually. I’ve been fiddling around with them for a while, and I still wasn’t satisfied, so what I have up right now are kinda placeholders.
The initial idea was to split the very broad category of “intelligence” into two smaller entities: (1) guile, which is cunning and deception, and (2) observation, which is how much you take in and deduce. Along the way, I think I shoehorned generic intelligence items into the latter label. Maybe a better term could be “insight.” Perception? Analysis? Judgment?
I could use some ideas or feedback from you guys about the ex-jobs. Right now, these are the broad career options, which vary depending on your age:
Law/Politics: Observation and Charisma
Boxer: Menace and Stamina
Academia: Observation and Guile
Pirate/Burglar: Menace and Observation
Sales: Charisma and Guile
Hacker: Guile and Observation
where the first trait listed is primary. I’m not sure if some of these quite fit, such as guile for Academia. If anyone has better suggestions or new ideas/combinations altogether, I’m all ears.
film noir is 1940s-1950s, duh everyone knows that. Howcan you do scifi, its mutually exclusive. This so dumb, a travesty to the genere.
@9inchh you are totally wrong there are a cyberpunk noir genre if you read or watch blade runner film you could see the most famous example there are also some noir steampunk
its not dumb and some of them received awards and amazing critics blade runner its considered one of best films in s XX noir genre don’t end in the 59 lol.
Being a long-term lurker there’s little I comment on here, but I have to say I was very pleasantly surprised with what you’ve done so far.
My first play-through was very mixed, as I struggled between trying to be fair and reasonable (which is usually rewarded later on) and pragmatic, (given the dark, cynical setting and my flagging financial situation).
I was suckered in by the women in the alley, but avoided having my scooter stolen.
I wasn’t sure what to make of Humphrey at first, a robotic assistant sounded a bit gimmicky, but he seems to have a solid personality and has shown he can be useful.
I managed to get on good terms with Chiarro, who seemed to appreciate a pragmatic attitude, but less so with Lieutenant Ockley, who I rubbed the wrong way with my cynicism of law enforcement. I had no trouble accepting full payment on the case as I was in no position to go pro bono, whatever the client’s situation.
I like the moral spectrum system you’re going with at the moment, it often irritates me when there are obvious “good” and “evil” choices with the “good” choice always yielding the best result. I find having conflicting ideals which are both arguable and shades of grey morality often aids in creating realism, deeper characters, and compelling moral dilemmas.
The character creation process worked well, flowing with the narrative without feeling artificial, and the choices made, such as age, ex-jobs, and hobbies felt like they affected the stats logically enough.
I thought the pictures introducing characters were a nice touch, used sparingly, they could add a lot of atmosphere to certain scenes.
I found it interesting that you’ve gone for a sci-fi angle, it might inject an original edge into the detective noir genre if handled well.
Most of the time, I don’t comment on works in progress because I don’t want to get attached to a work that is discontinued, which, sadly has happened quite often. However I feel this really has a lot of promise, so I don’t mind taking a chance on it, best of luck.
Couldn’t complete the entire thing but I liked what I read. The descriptions are really good as well as the writing style but sometimes it might be a little too descriptive. Not much but there is a slight feeling there. Great work though. Keep it up.
For the Observation stat, how about naming it Acuity? That would imply straight up perception as well as cleverness and deductive ability.
Re: professions, I would expect to see guile more than observation for the pirate, if not the burglar. Maybe make them two seperate professions available to all ages; one menace/observation, the other menace/guile.
It seems like menace is a bit underused? maybe a menace + observation combo, like the equivalent of a CIA agent or a pilot. Or menace and charisma for a gang leader. I agree about academia being weird with guile, maybe guile + observation can be like a street performer. A magician? Just throwing ideas out lol. Also, why not call it just “deduction”.
My theory on Chiaro is he probably just got us to go to Burbank so it’s one less person competing with him for apartments. But at the same time that seems really petty, since there are so many people there. Who knows.
@RupertDragoul
Thank you for your detailed feedback! I’m flattered that you came out of lurking to give your opinion.
I like that you went for the pragmatic options, because I very much want the game to be open to multiple approaches - without necessarily passing judgement or condemnation. Morality exists in the player’s mind and the characters’ minds, but the game itself doesn’t take an absolute stance. For example, if you ignore both Humprey and the woman allegedly in trouble, you arrive on time and you don’t have to pay a fee. In a sense, if you’re a survivalist, you make it fine; you won’t get punished for not being a hero. If you’re playing to be noble, you can also make it fine, but it will be harder. Making the “right” choices tends to be its own reward.
Humphrey’s conception is 100% gimmicky, haha, but I’m okay with gimmick if it manages to be entertaining. It also allows me to do some secondhand voiceover, which is such a staple in film noir.
@Wonderboy
I really like acuity, and I might actually end up using that. Thanks! And yeah, I’ll probably spread menace out a bit.
@sesquipedalian
Thanks for those ideas! A military or entertainment profession would fill some gaps. Re: Chiarro, don’t worry - you’ll see more of him in this Prudence case.
why does every one always bring up blade runner. Actually I have never understand why it’s so good, maybe you can “enlighten” me. First off the ending doesnt make any since, second the soundtrack is worse than nikki minaj. PS, han solo get back to star wars. 
The clothes also are a bit tacky. You’d think with a bigbudget they could “afford” some idea of fashion.
I love this game, I already said it, but I just cannot stop myself. I played again because I realised something pretty great. The skin colours of the characters are not described. Something I never understood is why describe skin colours only when they are not white. It makes the “unfortunate implication” alarm go wild. Glad to not see it happen here.
I named my characters Jean Harlow, Mae West, Anna May Wong, and soon I’ll name some more. Really, I have no self-control.
May I suggest a cloche hat as an option? I’m playing a femme fatal flapper most of the time (every fella’s weakness!), and a flapper is not such without a cloche hat on their head.
Also, I want to add that I love that the gender definer option is not the hat choice. Very, very nice.