Mind Blind (01/31 Demo Update. A Story Where You Are NOT The Chosen One!)

Let me start this by first saying that K Zarneki might be the love of my entire life (yes, even with the being able to read Button’s mind part), but I’d kill a man for Nick; wholesome sibling content is the kind of content I live for.

Having said that, my ramblings:

Your narrative is hilarious (I don’t think I’ve had this much fun playing something since, like… Ever??), but at the same time just serious enough that I can’t help but to want to know more about the lore and worldbuilding of Mind Blind. I loved that you’ve given Button ample space for us to decide how we want them to be. Resentful of their limits? Confident? Morbid? Button can be as much of a chaotic bastard as their heart desires (me. I’m the heart. My sibling says I reek chaotic dumbass energy, and I’m glad Button can be the same).

The other characters feel so well fleshed out, too? I mean, considering we’ve gotten mostly a peek at the majority of them, I’m surprised by how easy it is to differentiate and remember the ROs, and that’s got (believe it or not) nothing to do with the twenty-or-so times I’ve replayed the demo (I have a lot of free time and no self-control).

As previously stated, K is my absolute favourite. Though the current ending of the demo is the kind of thing that will make me end up waking up in the middle of the night six months from now on, relieving once more the sheer embarrassment the scene evoked in me (my poor Button was dreaming of that wedding in Bali, you know), and I do hope we get the chance to talk about that, all things considered, K could’ve been a complete jerk? And they weren’t, which, you know. Nice (the bar shouldn’t be set so low, I know, but they showed up and I had immediate feelings, I see no option other than to love them, sorry). Also, very important question: do we get to pet Annie and Cass?

Salomé is a close second, first because of her name (it’s so pretty???), but secondly because I’m a sucker for the childhood friends trope. AND GRAYSON, the cookie thief, I’m not gonna lie, I thought he was going to be my favourite? (and he might’ve been, had I not played the shih tzus route first) Glitch is a though competitor, though…

I didin’t particularly like nor dislike Kim, I mean, they seem competent, but just enough of a jerk that my first reaction upon them showing up was “… aaaaaalright” (with that many a’s, yes). And that’s not bad! I want my Button to be a top student, and I’m definitely feeling challenged.

I was really confused with the unknown person in the metro route, and then coincidentally after choosing the humming option, the moment when Glitch asks what music Button was humming under their breath got me going “oh my gOD”. And Button didn’t realize they were humming, so. Still talking about that, I wonder what the whole thing about the broom was. A metaphor for cleaning… The society? Or something alongside that?? A cult?? Hmm. ALSO I just wanted to say, I couldn’t for the life of mine remember what a Yamask Pokémon was like, so I googled it, and the first result describes it as “Each of them carries a mask that used to be its face when it was human. Sometimes they look at it and cry.” COINCIDENCE??? I think not.

NOW to the real MVP:::::::Nick. I loved that even though Button has a complicated relationship with their parents, you let us decide where we stand with the brother; even more so because Saint Nick is, in fact, a Saint. I mean, learning to cook just to cheer Button up? I’m sold. Though that does make me question, if the family knew about the bullying, why is it that every time Button mentions past experiences, I get the feeling that nothing was, like… Done about it?

Aaand, completely unrelated question: is Valero going to be a recurring character?

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Omg same with me for K too because they opened the door with just a towel on without any care! This whole demo gave me a giggle fit tbh.

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Read your demo a while back and I absolutely loved it. I thought about it again today and decided to re-read it and it’s… so, so, so good. Your writing is superb and the story is very engaging.

Mind Blind is without a doubt one of the WIP’s that I am most excited for to fully release! :blush:

Also… customisable bedsheets? 10/10.

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Currently my favorite WIP story atm. Looking forward to the full release in the future. Keep up the good work!

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The “-tion” choices, especially the “ignoration” choice when mc was with Glitch in the tiny room made me laugh, and I don’t mean that mental chuckle when something is mildly funny but an actual audible laugh.

Definitely already one of the top wips of the year. I read the whole tumblr in one sitting just to find out more about the characters :laughing:

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I don’t know how the fuck I missed this WIP for this long.

I’m such an idiot.

So, I read the demo. Holy shit, dude. Absolulely loved it. Particulary the way we can express ourselves (I’m like a sociopathic Allan Poe). The concept is also fantastic, I usually highly dislike playing as a weak MC but in this case, I love it (well, technically, I fucking hate it, but I love how much I hate it…if that makes sense).
I’m gonna make my MC the most ruthless tactician to have ever lived (as soon as I can get Magneto’s helmet).
ROs seem great, particulary K and Rosy although the angst on Sally’s route is exquisitely tempting.
From the moment I read the premise I knew I was gonna take the “villanous” path (there never was another path…) but I’m surprised on how very few of the people here seem to share the sentiment (from what I read, it’s over five hundred posts, I might have missed some).
And lastly, and I think this too is just a few of us…I. Utterly. Hate. Nick. And our whole family, really. And I’m not talking about regular hate I’m talking about complete loathing. I honestly hope we get to fucking kill them.

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Everyone’s feedback has been more kind and wonderful than I could ever imagine! I feel bad for not being more on top of responding–right now I’m full steam ahead trying to get the next update out before August.

I really liked the way personality was handled in Dragon Age 2, flawed game though it was. The idea of shaping the main character’s personality really appealed to me, and felt really innovative at the time. I get to customize more here as well due to not having to pay voice actors, luckily!

First off, NOTHING is coincidence :wink: Nor have you learned all there’s to learn about K. It takes a while for K to bare their soul, even if they have no such qualms about skin!

As far as the bullying, Hope and John would’ve interceded if they ever felt their child was in actual danger (it will be mentioned that Button was almost withdrawn from school and sent to live in a non-Ment commune at one point). Unfortunately, social ostracization can be just as devastating as being punched, but I don’t think Button’s parents really realized how bad it may have been, even being able to read Button’s mind. A lot of things are often dismissed as a kid being “sensitive” by parents, in my experience as a teacher. And Button was more isolated than actively harassed, with a few notable exceptions that they learned to deal with.

And Valero will be a recurring character!

I usually try to avoid one-word choices, but I found it too funny not to include. I had to double check that ignoration was actually a word, since my word processor told me it was a spelling error (I also tend to make up words a lot) :joy:

Thanks, fisheye! Someday I will stop skipping over articles.

I personally find it much more empowering to play from the perspective of fighting an uphill battle, and then winning, than I do to have a bunch of cool powers right off the bat (. . . claims the girl who uses cheat codes in most games to get the shiniest armor). Also, “villanous” is such a loaded word! I prefer “ethically flexible and determined to achieve one’s personal goals”. (Also, it’s okay if you hate Nick. He still loves you.)

Seriously, though, thank you to everyone for all the positive feedback and comments! They’re really motivating to read when I’m banging my head against my keyboard trying to figure out how to accurately describe the process of turning a lunchbox into a makeshift meteor hammer.

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There’s no requirement to keep to a schedule, and you do interact with your game’s community pretty frequently, all things considered. :grin:

With August coming up in less than a week, I know I’m plenty willing to forgive you for any future delays because you’re just trying to make sure any updates you release are rock solid, and as close to bug-free as possible. It’s really impressive work. The high bar you’ve set for your WIP’s quality mean that delays are to be expected from time to time. Of course, you’ve got an entire forum here willing to help with any future bugs should they arise, so anything you can’t quite puzzle out has a chance of being solved handily if you feel you need the backup support.

That said, you’ve got this! :blush:

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Morality is overrated anyway, am I right?

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How many people hoping for a route where the mc can side with the assumed villain in the story without the need to be controlled by them? >:)

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Just like button said “proper phrasing is important”

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read the demo and love this already! The concept is unique, the writing is fun and engaging and you did a great job giving me (the reader) an idea of the personalities of the characters. You also give enough choices re: the MC that I feel like I’m really getting to decide what her personality is like.

Can’t wait to read more!

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I really love your way of writing, it’s so charming and funny! I actually laughed out loud (literally lol’d) to a few of our MCs responses! Your writing reminds me of the demo Fox of Sunholt’s writing - which was so charming like yours… and it makes me miss this w.i.p.

Underneath are some screenshots of my favorite parts that I really like and I think it’s worth mentioning. There are spoilers underneath, of course.

Summary


This last response made me really laugh, it went from 0-100 and I can really hear myself say something silly like this in a response to some similar context. Also, I believe it is trash chute, instead of shoot (but it’s definitely how you pronounce it). I’m wondering how serious this response actually is because it felt like I barely got a response afterwards in the next page.


It’s very simple but it says soo much! Sometimes I like to read out loud to put myself into my character, I imagine the first being completely deadpan “… excuse me?” and the second or third being super dramatic, complete with a hand on the heart. “I can’t believe you’ve done this.”


It’s very simple but it says so much. Pretty sketchy if you ask me…


This is totally how I would respond (last response), I really like it. I just want to mention it because it made me laugh. I want to say that I don’t really laugh out loud reading stuff but, evidently I do.


With my first read I went to help the dogs out, so I didn’t understand exactly what was going on here. But I had a “hmmm…” moment for sure. And then re-read and take the metro route and go “Hmmmm!”.

For the metro route in general I felt like it was a bit short? But still very realistic because I would totally go “Hmmm?” and look at the grafiti. But that might just be ADHD me. I recommend including the Sally texts that was mentioned in the thread.

Another thing with that route (puppies/K/taxi) is that there is no mention of Sally. First it’s just telling you who your partner is, “Salomé Alavidze”. And the next page there is mention of a Sally and them playing Scrabble together. So obviously I had no idea who we were talking about, so something needs to be changed or added there. As well as in the walk/grayson/cookie route, there is no mention of Sally before until Nick asks us to stay at Salome’s for the weekend, and then again once more.
And in the stats page it just RO’s nicknames, but not for “Glitch”, it’s Taliaferro? But I quickly learned whose name that belonged through by this page. Obviously I understand this is a demo, but I think it’s important to mention. As well as parts that I loved.

The walk/grayson/cookies route gave a lot of story and it feels good to see our brother get some story. He seems like a nice person, and took on a lot of responsibility for us. I can sense the angst with MC’s relationship to their parents, what happened? :frowning:
With MC’s vulnerability I like to imagine that “my” MC has to protect herself. That she pushes down a lot of thoughts and feelings. Obviously this isn’t healthy, god it sounds so awful to know that her thoughts as teenager was open for broadcast. Everyone is so cringy, nerdy… and hormonal during that age - it almost makes me sweat just thinking about my family being able to hear my thoughts… oh god oh no.
So I imagine that MC isn’t doing too well from all of this, but keeps up a nice facade of “haha, I’m fine what do you mean??”. Which makes this page stand out to me a lot.

I will watch your career demo with big interest.

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I love the entire cast but right now my favorite is my big brother who makes me breakfast. Sorry various hot people, I am always tired and I hate cooking, you need to step up your game.
I hope there will be an option at some point to hug Nick and tell him we appreciate his… everything. Seriously, as an introvert, MC’s situation would have destroyed me, so having someone who’s 101% supportive and loving would literally be a life saver.

The twist with K is really fun, especially because Button brought it all on themselves. Nobody asked you to unnecessarily rescue these dogs! Or fantasize about this semi-naked hot person! Or go in a car with a stranger that might be harboring a grudge about your home invasion! You made questionable choices, now you are paying the price. Poetic justice.
Also, it fits really well into humorous Button’s life being a giant cosmic joke.

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Is there anyway I can pre-enter my name for the beta testing?

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I love every snarky response our mc is able to throw at people lol

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Haven’t finished the demo yet but I really just needed to stop and say that I absolutely love your writing style. I think it’s not often I find an author whose genuine sense of humor comes through in their writing, and whether consciously or not, you do it so well; all the little quirks in the descriptions and the MC’s thoughts/reactions bring so much personality to the text. I found myself laughing out loud more than a few times :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: (the metaphors are 11/10)

edit: I lost it at the ridiculously long option to acing the ASE oh my god lol

I appreciate that your premise is very focused on a specific type of power and the MC’s [non]abilities. Gives me the feeling you’ve fleshed out your world and plot a bit, and I’m really looking forward to that. Also, the sort of deadpan/exasperated tone surrounding the MC’s utter lack of mental capabilities makes the premise even better. I especially like the contrast between the MC and Nick - literally a 0 and 10(0) lmao.

As a fan of romance subplots, I’m also impressed that you’ve planned out romance not only for MC but also for Nick ! rubs hands I can’t wait to play matchmaker for my intrusive adorable brother haha !

Best of luck, and keep up the great work! So many great things so far. Thanks for sharing this story with us.

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I freakin love this!!! Cant wait for the next update!!

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I’m super excited for this series and when it comes down time for beta testing you can definitely count me in lol. I can’t wait to see where this goes.

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Thanks for the encouragement! And hey, the update did technically still come before August . . . barely, but still. More than anything, deadlines force me to stay on track. I’m pretty sure this last update is a lot rougher than earlier material, because there’s so many different branches that I can’t individually go through. Not quite sure it came together, honestly, but at very least there are no more game-breaking bugs (that I know of)!

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Thanks! Hopefully that continues–I’m a little afraid that character development and consistency went to the wayside due to being more focused on coding consistency for the last half of Chap 2.

Thanks for all your feedback! I swear that I actually do teach English, although you wouldn’t know it from the amount of typos and grammar errors in my writing lol. Chapter 1 is definitely getting tweaked–I had rewritten the Metro route, but then used a flashback from it at the end of Chapter 2. The current version is thus the same old one while I take time to patch over the stuff that I added and then removed.

It’s only fair, right? Although K has even more surprises up their sleeve.

I’ll keep your offers in mind! Most of the demo will be public, with the exception of either the very end or a certain route that reveals everything (I haven’t decided yet). Because Mind Blind is a mystery at heart, and I don’t want the biggest reveal to be spoiled before it gets released.

I love romance in IF, but I’m often not all that into the RO options for my MC. If someone isn’t interested in any of the ROs, I still wanted to make sure that they could enjoy a romance.

I tried to put in clues about Sally’s crush on Nick sprinkled through Chapter 2, but most of them are missable. She’s also an interesting RO because you don’t decide whether or not you have a preexisting crush on her until after spending time together–the idea being that she and Button are close enough friends that their feelings won’t change Button’s behavior around her. I’ll be curious to see if there’s any backlash to this–I like it, but I’m open to re-tweaking her introduction.

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