The story is interesting, but there are a few issues.
Game-stopping errors (afrer noticing a suspicious car), like the one mentioned above and tailed line 233: increasing indent not allowed, expected 0 was 1.
Characters are introduced too quickly, hard to visualize and keep track on who is who, at least on the first playthrough. Character introductions need some fleshing out. A list of important characters somewhere in the stats would also be nice.
I think the incident in the Court would be better if the player character could actually experience and participate in it, rather than being shown a short flashback and state a motivation.
There are a lot of interesting fae species, but they need to have descriptions to let a player decide which to choose. There are different abilities and diets later, and I like that the PC is given different meals depending on their species. But I would prefer for the MC’s special fae abilities to be more involved in the beginning of the story. For example, let the character use their resistance to fire to escape the Court, rather then hold a lighter and make your hand scaly. [Edit: Judging by content of tailed.txt file, there are instances where MC uses their power, but using them in the first scene would still be interesting].
Edit: it’s also strange there is only one scale for relationships. It works now, but what if new characters with conflicting interests will be introduced? Or you meet that James, with no concern in his eyes, just duty? Relationships with them can’t be all the same and use the same variable.
Edit: I looked at tailed.txt.
#Rely on the cop option - not clear what the character would do from the option text. What if a reader sees that option, thinks “They are going to ask the police for help, right?”, but no, the MC decides to get the cop’s attention by breaking the law!
Also, will shapeshifting/casting spells in front of the police (as opposed to just quickly riding away) affect the plot later by making hiding among humans harder?
Good luck with your game!
