A Longship to Dyrrachion - Sail to the Byzantine Empire for Viking riches and glory! [HISTORICAL WIP]

I just finished going through your demo, it is a bit too short to give much feedback on, but I think (so far) you have an engaging writing style and a really fascinating story idea, I hope to see you keep working on it!

As general advice from a fellow first-time ChoiceScript writer, the forums are your best friend! Most of my problems I’ve been able to fix by going to the ChoiceScript wiki on Fandom, or by posting a question here on the forum.

Keep chipping away at it, and try not to get too hard on yourself if you hit roadblocks or if writer’s block stops you from keeping up with your goals – it happens to all of us!

In any event, I look forward to reading more of your story, and will do my best to give any constructive feedback I have when the time comes! Great work so far, and I look forward to seeing what else you have in store.

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Thank you for the response!

Arguably there should probably be Catholics too, from the Anglo-Saxons and some of the Norse (and the Crusaders, should they show up). I did notice that Tostig was a choice, happy to hear there’ll be same flavour text for that. Perhaps “Halfdan”/“Halvdan” ought to be another (after the inscriptions in the Hagia Sophia?)

Great to hear those plans, and I’m looking forward to see how it takes shape!


Perhaps not as ROs (because of the status difference, though it would be less than with Alexios), but I’d personally I’d like to encounter Alexios’ children, mainly Anna Komnena and John II, assuming the timeline’s been moved around for them too.

Relatedly, there are stories about Hardrada and a Byzantine Princess, but if he couldn’t do it, it would be hard to justify the PC managing it.

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Thank you! That is lovely of you to say.

Speaking of which, what do people mean when they say “writing style”? I don’t quite follow.

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Of course!

I’ve actually gone and tied some of the names to religion, like Christian (obviously) and Johanna, so to allow MC to express their feelings towards religion a little earlier on in a (hopefully) natural manner.

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Anna clearly had the hots for Bohemond of Sicily, so I mean, a chance with a handsome/beautiful Viking isn’t too out of theme…

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I was thinking more of the political concerns of marrying the Captain of the Varangian Guard (who might not come from a very distinguished background here), but I can’t disagree with you on Anna’s interest in attractively-martial figures of Norse descent.

The idea seems like it’d be interesting and I know a lot of users like royal romances (including myself if its done right). Additionally it could add some sweet/dramatic moments to the story that you wouldn’t get with other ROs which adds to the replayablility.
Despite an emperor seeming too high up thus usually unattainable, I reckon the right PC and interactions could make it work since they’ll be in close proximity to the Emporer anyway due to all the protecting. Realistically, there would undoubtedly be conflict and tension because nobles wouldn’t like a commoner romancing their Emporer but this adds some of that angst people love.

Whether you do this or not I’m still gonna be hyped for future updates.

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So, this story has peak my interest, because I love historical based stories.

Its, short, but like you said you just started this story today, so I am looking forward to reading more about your story.

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ALEXIOS KOMNENOS MY BELOVED!

With that out of my system (for now), by this point in history paganism was becoming a fringe in Norway, even if it still held a substantial cultural influence in northern Europe. Is our character a man from the fringe, or just part of a group that still keeps the old ways?

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You know, I have been thinking about this comment today.

I am a bit hesitant to write romance myself (as an aromantic person) but Alexios could be a romance option.

He is married though to Irene Doukaina, who is an active player in the political arena and will never actually marry you.

At most, you will be a (very beloved) mistress. I’m thinking about it as you can basically take over the duties of his wife and have him set her aside, but not receive the official recognition.

Reason being your social standing - you’re from a remote land that has in the past pillaged the Empire, so the Emperor marrying such a heathen would cause an uproar.

You are also not a noble, just someone who was fairly “middle class”, if a little more well off back home.

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Can you link me that bit about Hardrada and a Byzantine Princess? I am curious to see it.

Also, how would you feel about playing Viking games with the other characters in the story?

I am thinking ones like hnefatafl, ball and stick games, dice, etc.

Too slice-of-life and boring, or something to get to know the other characters?

It is also something to close out the chapter, on a positive note (before they reach shore)

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In the Icelandic tradition dating back to the early thirteenth century, Harald Hardrada was supposedly desired by both the empress Zoe (c. 980-1050), wife to three emperors, and by her niece, Maria. When he is thrown into prison, a rich and pious Byzantine widow comes to his rescue.

“How Icelanders Experienced Byzantium, Real and Imagined”. Partial preview on Google Books for me.

Morkinskinna…records a series of verses that Harald composed… [which explicitly include] a reference to Elisabeth Iaroslavna, despite accounts of Harald’s interest in marrying a royal Byzantine woman named Maria, or Empress Zoe’s interest in marrying Harald himself during his time in Constantinople. It is likely that Harald and Elisabeth’s marriage was prearranged…[and] though entirely absent from Rusian sources, fits with the picture of Rusian dynastic marriage…

Reimagining Europe. Partial preview on Google Books, again, for me.

It’s mentioned on his Wiki page and some academic literature on Google Books/Scholar too.

Apparently it originates from the Norse Sagas, so whether it actually happened IRL is debatable.


I think it would be a decent way to get to know the other characters, a narrative device while adding some flavour. Potentially the PC’s own personality by whether they choose to cheat or not, or by what games they play. Perhaps gambling could show up if the PC’s money plays a role?

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I love the history of the Varangian Guard.

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@Elijuneau I just finished reading your WIP and I LOVED IT!!!

Omg when I tried to flirt with Erikur, he shot me down, and the text read: “Even I feel sorry for you” :rofl: :joy: :laughing:

In other news, I felt like the choices made sense, stats seemed balanced, and I couldn’t find any grammatical errors… you sure you haven’t done this before? :wink:

Can’t wait to see where the story goes, I’ll be on the lookout for updates.

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