There’s a mix. Some people would rather just pass and identify as male or female.
Others being transgender is part of their identity and it’s not something they hide or feel shame over. (Not to say the first category does.)
And there’s those who’re genderqueer who’re not interested in always being male or female but may wish to be seen as both, or neither, or sometimes one, sometimes the other.
Thank you for your very thoughtful reply. I think you’ve raised some very interesting points.
Oh no! I’d definitely not write trans characters as token minorities, whose sole facet of personality is “hey I’m trans! I’m trans!” I do hate token characters.
Oh the mention of erasure is a good one, and one I hadn’t truly considered. Although I’ll say I never intended for the choices to change nothing. Just not for that single choice to be the sole focus of the plot and all of your interactions. Instead it would be a fully nuanced character where that is one aspect of their identity.
I do find it frustrating when such choices aren’t taken into consideration at all. When they just don’t matter. If they don’t matter there’s no point having them.
I thought that your reply did make sense and it was very thoughtful.