Mm. Just trying to figure out how to deal with an arranged marriage situation without cheating the player out of having romance if they don’t like the spouse 
(the spouse is chill with whatever, as long as the MC doesn’t try to murder them, in which case better get it right at the first try)
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Something something, time in hell, something, something, coming to appreciate the other members on some level would be my guess.
To each their own, I don’t have a specific number preference personally, I just like having not having to choose.
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Sorry, I didn’t mean therapy for Seven. I meant therapy for the people in the marriage and they end up happy in the end.
Once there’s Masashi in the mix, it’s gonna be very rough first few days. To stay on the theme, I think Hatch and Momoko were the only example of LI having an admirer that I’ve enjoyed. Mainly because Hatch doesn’t boil down to it and because he actually grows and develops as a character with or without his crush on her.
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This seems fair enough, provided you have a way to let the MC know the spouse is chill with whatever before the romance starts.
Do you think this is about the actual numbers for you, or just the fact that we’re dealing with limited time in IFs so if you spread yourself too wide on the romances you end up not knowing the ROs well enough?
Look, Chani, some people just need their emotional support animals, alright? It’s a real problem! 
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Are the married partners romantic with each other, or is it more a friendly relationship between them?
Have either of them had other partners during the marriage before, or would the PC be the first?
I think the specifics and the ‘feel’ of things are important, in whether it will make people feel uncomfortable.
Personally, I’d just choose to date both, when that’s available, unless I really dislike one of them.
I was just reminded of the situation in Choice of Romance, so I must also say that it matters if politics and social machinations is a part of it all.
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Oh, then I’d want no part of that romance. If the two of them are actually meant to be together, count me out. I won’t make a MC for either of them.
In a poly sense, I might play it, though (were both of them male, anyway). It just depends on if I get the right vibe instead of the it looking like the MC would always be on the outside looking in. Third wheel romances piss me off.
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As a writer, definitely numbers. As a player, I find couples of three very easy to fit into my preferences and interests if the characters engage me enough - I know that canonically twins from Golden Rose aren’t romanceable as a v-triad, but I enjoy imagining the dynamic. One of the pairs I mull over in one of my project is a pair of artificial human twins and a cold battle-hardened veteran that oversees them. In one of my Wraith of the Righteous runs it was very easy to imagine a nice triad between Arushalae, my Trickster-to-Golden Dragon and Woljif.
It’s mainly character-dependent. I’m a severe enjoyer of orcuses on their thrones, villain couples and evil viziers to the evil conquerors, and these are very easy to imagine as a loving triad.
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Amy answered me directly regarding the non-poly romance of Victoria. She stated that the MC does not need to play marriage-wrecker and that if you support Victoria and help her work out her issues, that she will break off her relationship with Gina on her own.
I won’t go the cheating route, in any game. So if there are no other romance options I am interested in, I will go without romance for that particular game.
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We also know that the relationship is not okay. So you are not really the one potentially breaking the relationship you can actually be the healing factor for them. That is quiet different then destroying a good relationship
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I first read “couples of three” as “six people”, but I guess that wasn’t what you meant? 
They get married in the game, the spouse starts as neutral (although slightly worried, because they’re really uncomfortable with how the whole marriage came to be, due to the MC’s parents’ actions). The MC’s disposition is up to the player, as well as how the relationship evolves from there (it could become anything from actually falling in love to becoming bitter enemies, but if the player chooses to fall in love, that’s obviously not a case of not liking the spouse). The spouse will, after the marriage has happened and the MC has arrived to their new home, let the MC know they don’t have any expectations, apart from the MC staying out of certain areas of the building they live in (it’s huge), the MC carrying a device that lets the security system know where they are allowed to be (so that the MC doesn’t, say, accidentally blow themself up, and the aforementioned not murdering part.
It would be the spouse’s first marriage (they’ve had relationships before the marriage, but not during it) and I think I’ll leave the MC’s history to the player, although one of the potential ROs I’ve been thinking of would potentially be an old flame of the MC’s.
There is a little politics involved, but it’s pretty much limited to the “this marriage needs to happen”, unless the player really wants to push the issue (which, then, would just pretty much be about talking the spouse to go out and be a hero, which they’d otherwise rather not do). Definitely nothing to do with the number of partners involved though. Also no reason to hide any affairs, unless the player decided the MC is too scared of the spouse to actually talk about things (they do have a reputation of being dangerous), they can happen out in the open.
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Nah, three people at max.
Exactly it’s about communication in the story and also in the advertisement for the story. If you know of the situation you can act accordingly and not be stumbling in a situation you don’t like
Exactly, don’t make a character into a romance if they are meant to be with someone else!
With the emphasis on the last part. Poly is good and well but it has to be mutual. Not just hey you wanna fuck with us too. You may even stay the night to watch us from the sidelines in the morning being the perfect couple.
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Ah, sorry, I misunderstood. I read it as if the RO was in an arranged marriage, not the MC.
In that case, I’ve read multiple WIPs (both here and on itch.io) where the MC gets into an arranged marriage, but can romance other people instead. It’s never been a problem for me.
I do tend to want to romance the spouse, though. But that might just be because I love a good ‘arranged marriage to love’ story.
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It’s the commitment part. Friends with benefits is something I wouldn’t want to be in the middle of either, but not for the same reasons as not wanting to break up or interfere in an established relationship.
If you still have to hide it, it’s still a problem. I don’t want to play anyone’s “dirty little secret” because that implies that there is an inherent acknowledgement that one or more parties are doing something wrong. In that case, you, the interloper, will always be in the wrong no matter the actual situation. Which just makes it easier for the other parties to cast you aside or as the villain if they need one. It puts PC in a situation that no one with a healthy respect for themselves should be comfortable in. (Let’s not turn this into “playing damaged characters.” That needs to be a topic of its own.)
I would be more comfortable with this, but both sides of the poly, even a V-poly, need to be in on the invitation. I would not want to be, even in play, part of a relationship where there was so little respect and trust between the partners that one goes off to find a third of their own without even informing their primary partner. If PP is uncomfortable with it, then perhaps PP isn’t really wanting to be in a poly. If that’s the case, what is PC getting involved for? Is PP being abused or coerced into the poly? There are too many questions and too little contact and “I don’t care what you do” doesn’t answer any of them enough for me to feel comfortable pursuing one member of a V with no contact with the other. Ordinary full-house poly, I would be uncomfortable if not pursued by all members of the poly. It doesn’t matter what type of polymance either, if a member who is only in the relationship for the romance or the emotional connections and not for anything physical is uncomfortable with the poly or the poly expansion to include PC, then PC doesn’t need to be there, either. There’s a lot that goes into it, I guess is what I’m saying. But breaking up an existing relationship or adding unnecessary stressors to one because you just HAVE to insert yourself…no. Never.
And in some cases it’s just always going to feel cruel.
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It might be in the same vein as the rumours about the Clintons, where it was rumoured that Hillary knew that Bill was sleeping with other women but didn’t care, as long as it wasn’t public not because of any personal reasons but because it would implode their political careers. I feel this is a different thing than “a dirty little secret” the way you used the term.
This is a case of either a blanket permission, which morally works for me, or outright cheating, which is “hahahaha lol no” levels of doesn’t.
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Yeah, in stories that are set in our own world, or another with similar cultural norms, there can be reasons why you can’t just be public about being poly.
There’s a lot of stigma about it, and it can really be a problem if you live in a conservative country, and have some level of fame, especially in politics.
Even here where I live, which is supposedly rather progressive and doesn’t have the big religious pressure to conform, a lot of people still can’t seem to understand that it isn’t just cheating.
In some times and cultures, extra-marital affairs might actually be illegal.
But it’s absolutely valid not to want to take part in a relationship that you have to keep secret, even when it’s for good reasons.
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[quote=“rfzhao, post:260, topic:21020”]
Would you feel the same way about ROs in a FWB relationship with each other where both parties make it clear that they have no romantic feelings for each other?
[/quote] yep, this one will definitely turn me off right away if they still fucking before the ro met the pc, unless they’re ex FWB and that’s in the past then I have no problem
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I’m just too greedy and possessive to share my RO’s with each other, and if I notice some chemistry going on, then I become that Toy Story “I don’t wanna play with you anymore” meme and find someone else lol
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I have no problem with having monogamous relationship with characters that can be a part of a poly route, but I strongly prefer ROs that are exclusively monogamous. I love “destined to be together” kind of romance, so knowing that the sole reason my RO doesn’t get together with one of the other ROs alongside me is that I, as a player, chose to pursue their solo route instead of poly, sours the feeling that we are meant for each other.
Since the other RO is a part of the plot, they and romanced RO are still interacting with each other, and I find it somewhat implausible that they didn’t happen to fall for each other in this version of the universe. As readers, we know for a fact that these two ROs are romantically compatible and are attracted to each other, so why aren’t they getting together? Is the MC just an inconvenience standing in the way of their love? Do they still have some attraction to each other, but they’re ignoring it only because MC isn’t interested in poly? This makes me paranoid!
Of course, I know that my RO loves only me and won’t fall in love with anyone else if I choose to romance them separately, but I can’t help feeling a tiny bit uneasy because of the meta knowledge I have as a reader.
One more thing that bothers me about that: I’m not fond of the idea that RO is okay to share me with someone else under the right circumstances. I like possessive ROs and I cannot lie. 
Ultimately, it’s not that serious - I won’t refuse to romance anyone only because they’re available for a poly route; but I wanted to shed some light on why someone can feel that way.
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