May 2024's Writer Support Thread

I went out of my usual way of doing things today and planned and started coding my final chapter before doing the penultimate one. It’s weird, but I think it’ll help to know where I’m aiming towards. The code for a summary and one follow-up conversation has been just over 3000 words so far…

Also, I always listen to a particular album or artist on repeat when I’m in the last chapter or two of a project, even though I have playlists that I listen to when writing for most of the rest of it. (Royal Affairs was the Immortality soundtrack, the epilogue was the Amarantus soundtrack, Noblesse Oblige was Elliot Holmes discography.) This one looks like it’s going to be the Disco Elysium soundtrack, though that may change as I get nearer the end.

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Today in homage of my soul sister @Eiwynn preparing her big private testing stream I have decided to do a 24 hours small game in her honour.

I am 4 hours in and I am more 1k in. Maybe it will be shit, but it is being made through love. I will post it here if I achieve my goal dont expect big quality however.

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Best of luck with the testing, @Eiwynn! And with your game @poison_mara!

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Welcome to the 15th everyone. Thank you @Eiwynn, I am a May baby.

I guess I’ll be the first to share a snippet this month. I have not bothered to fully place in the code, nor have I done much proof reading on this. I wrote it on the ending half of last month. I may get back to it, but am working on other things now.

Wells of Destiny Opening

Tonight, a chosen few will learn the sounds of Death’s footsteps. The echoes of my metal framed boots become more apparent as I out of the storm and into the compound. The metallic shell around my boots clink together with each step as metal plates that act as armor knock together. A group of men glance over at me with faces fitting for the arrogantly ignorant.

I give them little bother as the door closes behind me as I brush off the sand from my glane-skinned poncho. The local beasts are massive and their skin does well with filtering off the sand. Unfortunately they were some of the hairiest beasts I have ever met and that makes wearing them unpleasant when in this side of the great barrier.

The men readjust their grips as they shout something at me and lift their weapons at me. I motion for them to hold on for a minute and I think they understand as they wait. I remove my hood and let the cool artificial air hit my skin. Slowly I remove the earplugs that filter out the noises of living creatures.

“What are you doing here old ${ManWoman}?” The gun-ho youth asks and his senior at his side shakes his head in disappointment but does not correct him.

I look between the two quickly and give a determination that I could in fact go through both of these men before they understand who they are up against. While their weapons were good enough to kill most of the people they are used to bullying, I am not one of those people. Most likely their aim and reflects will not be able to handle a proper fight against me. I decide that I will do what I would normally do.

*choice
#I convince them to walk away.
#I quickly dispose of the men.
#I gather information from the men.

*label Talk1

I give them a sigh as I look at my left wrist. While it does not activate until the attack is incoming my barrier is ready to defend me from harm if any of the ranged attacks. While limited in its scope the barrier system should handle their rudimentary metal slugs, even if it is at fourty percent power at the moment.

I ignore the baiting of the youth and look to the older liking man. His skin is a dark umber and his yellow eyes let me know that he is a Asferian. His skull is far more ilongated compared to humans that their necks are extra strong to compensate for the weight. A fin run from where his nose would be if he were human over the top of the head and vanishing somewhere in the back of his neck.

His species has one less finger than a human, but the last finger is slightly longer making it awkward for him to hold his gun the way I’d hold one. His weapon was not made for his species.

“This will be your only chance to walk away unharmed,” I explain to the older man, “The owner hired me to do what I do best here.”

“We are the owners n—!” The kid started to say before being cut off.

“The adults are talking boy,” the older alien says as he eyes me up, “you do not look as tough as your reputation describes.”

“I’m sure that’s what everyone thinks before forfeiting their lives,” I explain as I cock myhead tot eh side, “will you join that list?”

The alien thinks over things for a moment as I slip my earbuds into a belt pouch. The man looks to the youth for a moment then back to me.

“We’re leaving,” the man announces as he pulls out an ear piece and tosses it to the ground. He gives me a head nod of gratitude as he walks past me.

“You can’t be serious,” the boy protests, “we have him outgunned!”

“Quiet boy, maybe if you are lucky one day you will live long enough to tell your kids the story of how you were almost killed for foolish pride, but instead listened to your elder,” the Asferian explains and gesters for the kid to follow. He then stops and calls for me, “You won’t be able to talk the rest down!”

Noted.

*goto Continue1

*label Fight1

I tak in air and let it out slowly as I know what needs to happen next. As the two of them wait for how I’m going to respond I check the power levels of my barrier on my left wrist. The screen comes on automatically displaying that it is at fourty percent power. More than enough for their basic metal slugs.

When I look back up at the men the younger one steps forward in a failed attempt to intimidate me and that is when I pounce. Before he realizes that I am in motion I already have his arms in the air and let him unload his semiautomatic pistol. With a quick strike to his side he topples over in pain.

I sidestep the second gunman’s attack as he brings his weapon down and pulled the trigger. The youth’s eyes go wide before they are forcefully ejected from his body. I spin around the side of the man before I take hold of his shoulder and slam him to the ground. As the man fights to regain the air to his lungs I slam the bottom metal plate of my boot to the side of his head.

While not dead, he is out of commission.

*goto Continue1

*label Gather1

I take a moment to brush some of the sand off my computer strapped to my left forearm. It reads that my barrier is at fourty percent power. That should be more than enough if something goes wrong.

I turn my attention back to the pair before shifting weight from one foot to the other. I keep my hands to my sides just in case one of them decide to make the last choice of their life.

“So why are you here?” I ask as I shift my attention to the elder.

“We own this place!” The youth yells and I hope that it does not alert others to my presence.

“No, you don’t,” I correct and shake my head, “that is why I’m here. So why has your group seized the port?”

“If we are here it is because this place is now ours,” the youth’s voice shows irritation.

“So, you two have no idea what is going on,” I say with a head nod, “You don’t know why you have been left to be the cannon fodder here either I’m guessing. Your powers that be must have known I was coming.”

“And who are you?” The elder asks.

“Finally, you ask a question, but still the wrong one,” I say as my focus goes to the space behind them. The direction I’ll need to go to get further into the port. “I can see in your eyes that you know who I am.”

The man’s chin rises as his spine bristles. Then the correct question finally comes: “Will you allow us to leave.”

I do not answer but instead give a nod. As the youth protests the senior pulls an earpiece from his head and tosses it to the ground. He drags off the youth and I wait until the two are gone before proceeding.

*label Continue1

Now with that over with I look to my forearm computer to see if I have a map of this port. Unfortunately, I had never requested it when I had originally taken this job months ago.

“Efficient as ever,” I hear on my right like a small voice sitting on my shoulder.

“That young human deserved to suffer more,” proclaims a separate voice on my left side. “The way he spoke to us was completely uncalled for.”

I ignore the commentary of the two voices as I have grown used to over the years. I begin to hear a third voice break through the banter of the other two.

“Science, Con,” I say the names of the right and left voices respectfully. The two go quiet as they wait for instructions. “Where is that voice coming from?”

“Searching,” Science says.

“Do you think it is someone who needs help?” Con questions but I ignore his feedback. This isn’t his field to help.

“It appears to be coming from your feet,” Science reports and I look down to see the Asferian’s earpiece.

I pick up the comms device and bring it to my ear enough to hear the chatter.

“Oh, you should say hello!” Con says gleefully, “maybe you can make a new friend! It might be good for me. You. It might be good for you.”

“Idiot,” Science protests, “we’re surrounded by enemies. These people will not be our friends.”

“Quiet,” I instruct the two and listen into the earpiece more. The communication seems to be a check in procedure. They really were expecting some one to show up.

*choice
Fire #I let them know that I have arrived.
Life #I link up with the comm system to continue listening in.
Metal #I disable communications.
Water #I act like I’m one of the men.
Earth #I dismiss the comm device.

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I just discovered that Wikipedia has a list of the sounds animals do in a lot of languages and is being really useful now.

I just discovered that crickets make in English the same noise than BIRDS?!

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And apparently the only thing everybody can agree on is cow.

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One cow to rule the world!

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Nope! While it can be “muu” or “möö” in Finnish, it’s also “ammuu”. But then again, we’re chronically contrarian. :laughing:

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One Cow for the Cattle Baron on his leather throne,
In the land of Mooordor where the cattle lie.
One Cow to moo them all, One Cow to graze them,
One Cow to herd them all and in the darkness gore them
In the Land of Mooordor where the cattle lie.

But so it would come to pass that the Cattle Baron would be defeated, when someone went in the night and tipped the One Cow into Mount Doom.

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Aannd I just received my first bug report… which was a false alarm, but which led me to find an actual error nevertheless.

I think that is a record for me, in receiving and catching a bug/error in the shortest amount of time.

. :revolving_hearts:

A new “1984” novel I assume you decided to write after I inspired you?

. :rofl:

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Yeaaaah, I’m not really keen on handing the right another book they look at and decide to use as an instruction manual.

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Yeah, I second that. I have a literal fabulous talking cow goddess in my current WIP… :smile:

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Happy May 15th everyone!

For this month’s excerpt, I am going to share the opening of Patchwerks: River Styx (part two of Patchwerks).

Opening Scene excerpt 05/15/24

Chapter 12a Third Awakening, Bunk House, Dock Route

“$!{name}…” Emille stands in the threshold of the Bunk House’s common room, holding the black oak door open for you and Raphael. “Your room is on the top floor.”

“Yea.” Raphael, with a backpack full of your sundry items, brings up the rear of your small group. He doesn’t look too pleased. “And there is no elevator to help us up.”

You ignore the banter between the cherubim and shuffle forward into the Bunk House for the first time. The common accommodations is a long and narrow room, dimly lit by small phlogiston lamps hanging from the ceiling. Bunks are built from the floor to ceiling lining the walls to either side of you and the open floor is filled with tables chaotically placed under the lamps.

“Ugh” You pause to let your eyes adjust to the flickering lamps and you feel the acrid smell start to tickle your nose as you glance around the room. “Is it always this busy?”

“Uh huh.” Emille cocks an eyebrow and purses her lips before giving you an amused reply. “Especially in the off-hours and when Charon’s barge is not docked.”

In one corner, a group of rowdy dockworkers have pushed a few of the tables into a circle, forming a stage where a nimble fingered fiddler is furnishing music for a couple that is dancing on the tables.

In an opposite corner, one young man is reading a letter under a sputtering lamp, and the tears rolling down his clean-shaven face tells of the heartbreak he must be experiencing. Other men and women lay asleep in their bunks, while others lay sick, coughing and moaning in misery.

“Wha —?” Your eyes focus on the pallid face of a corpse staring out from another bunk at the mingling of merriment and sadness taking place here. “What is that?”

“Bah!” Raphael moves over to the man and covers the still features of the corpse with the edge of a blanket, careful not to disturb him. “He must have just passed away.”

“Daniel and Elle will be here tomorrow.” Emille cracks her neck and shrugs her shoulders. “They will take him into the crypts and a new applicant will take his bunk then.”

The music and the dancing, the letter reading and the deep discussions continue all around you unchecked by the hideous presence of death.

As in the prior months, I invite everyone to share an excerpt.

Remember that excerpts shared here are not intended to elicit proper critique and feedback, but if anyone does have an opinion feel free to share it with me, here or in DM :revolving_hearts:

Edit:

Yes. that bit should have been nipped. lol. Maybe you should be an editor :wink: lol

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Stoff

snrk “accommoNdations”. Pun aside, you follow this with an “is”, should be an “are” (the verb refers to “accommodations”, plural, not to “long and narrow room”).

I suggest putting this bit between commas.

O_o

Wait, I’m confused, aren’t you ALREADY writing this?

10 points for guessing what part of my freelance job is. :stuck_out_tongue: (the other parts are translating and transcribing)

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Here’s mine.

MC is being a jerk here.

Around your ankles, shadows gather creeping, crawling, slithering, screeching. Something’s wrong (and while in this place something’s always wrong, this time it’s something that shouldn’t be) so you slip in through the door to see what’s what and if there’s something you could do.

Overlook’s there, as expected; what’s less as expected is the confused look on his face, that he’s directing to Nachtkanker, who’s curled up in a gathering of shadows in a corner, shaking.

That’s when Sparkgap rushes in (he’s in his gym gear; that explains why he wasn’t there earlier), stops, and takes stock of the situation. Overlook gets a raised eyebrow from him, but then he notices Nachtkanker and freezes.

“Um,” Overlook says.

“Nachtkanker!” Sparkgap sprints and kneels on their side, wrapping his arms around them, and throws Overlook an angry look. “What did you do?!

“I didn’t…” Overlook says. “I mean…”

At this point, Nachtkanker has crawled up Sparkgap’s lap, and is crying in his shirt. Sparkgap is holding them tightly; his mouth is moving, but you can’t hear what he’s saying.

“You should have known something like this would happen,” you say, voice level.

Know? What did they ever do to you?

"Val - " Overlook says.

“Don’t you Val me! Get out, I don’t have time for your foolishness.”

Sparkgap,” you say.

“Both of you.”

"Come on, now, let’s be reasonable - " Overlook says.

Reasonable? You haven’t had a reasonable day in your life.” Sparkgap glares at you, eyes glowing black void. “Get. Out. Of. My. Sight.

“Think about it,” you say. “You did this.”

The lights flicker, and at that, the shadows shift. “No,” Sparkgap says, voice suddenly eerily calm. “You did. I suggest you remove yourselves before I do something I’ll regret.”

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I am 10 hours and I am only near 3k I feel really bad. I have the concept and half the project more or less done. But I feel like a failure. I am crap. Anyone can do better.

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Nope! Me writing 3k words in 10 hours is a good day.

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Me, writing the different variations of the intimate scenes for my WiP: “Okay, I use ‘immediately’ a lot. What are synonyms for ‘immediately’…” clickity clack, looks it up on google.

“Ah yes, of course, the age old phrase: ‘I forthwith notice she’s not wearing a bra.’ Yes, that will work splendidly, I’m sure…”

That had me giggling for a full five minutes lmao

EXACTLY LMAO

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You could also check if you need all of them, if you haven’t already?

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It’s a bit of a mind trick on myself I get when writing my game. I think I’m using it a lot more than I actually am. I’m on variation 13/32 with these intimate scenes, so realistically, every time I write one, I’m writing a single scene for people to see, not multiple. So it’s one of those things where I can afford to use it multiple times, because they’re different routes, so a single playthrough is still only going to see it the one time in that single scene, if that makes sense.

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