"Escapism" vs "realism" with regards to NB MC

I do feel that a poll like this doesn’t really… cover the nuances of the subject and different writing approaches. I would be really interested to hear more what people enjoy about the idea of correcting characters about their MC’s gender or telling people pronouns more than once, because I struggle to understand where the enjoyment is in that experience, especially if it’s repeated.

There is a discussion thread here from a few years ago which may be of interest that talks about writing nonbinary characters. Some similar points were made, but there are more details in the responses than can be got from a poll. (I was amused to notice that even back then I was banging on about moments of community and recognition - nice to know that I’m consistent in some ways four years on.)

In my games until now I was firmly in the camp of “not making a huge deal about gender because I want to show that the setting treats nonbinary people as unmarked”. For Honor Bound, partly because I feel better-equipped to do it, and partly because I want to include opportunities for recognition/kinship which isn’t possible when it’s completely unmarked, plus more explicit intimate scenes, I am including:

  • some details about a non-cis MC’s transition (whatever that looks like, medical or otherwise)
  • chances to talk about it with other characters if they want to
  • unique interactions with non-cis MCs
  • optional intimate scenes that describe characters’ anatomy in more detail than I did in previous games, including for nonbinary characters, and nonbinary MCs if they want (basically attempting to avoid either physical blank-slates or cis/binary-focused descriptions in explicit scenes for nonbinary MCs and characters)

I am not including moments of misgendering, inconvenience, talking an NPC through confusion, an MC explaining their gender to an NPC, the MC having to explain to someone what their body is like, or transphobia, because I’m not interested in exploring that for this project. Of course, I am writing in a setting where I’m not restricted by concerns about historical authenticity. (but - I am a broken record on this, I know - researching queer life in historical periods will likely turn up some fascinating people and communities that will bring authenticity and, dare I say, realism to games in historical settings!)

None of which is to say this is the right way to do it, or that I’ve done everything (or anything!) perfectly - @ChibiKittens may be referring to Honor Bound when talking about games which include character customisation that doesn’t get followed up on enough. I am certain there are plenty of gaps and places for improvement. But I think it’s important to bear in mind that when writing about these characters and subjects, escapism/realism is not equivalent to positive/negative and does not have to be… drumroll… a binary.

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