Hey there, this is the alpha demo of The Passenger. In it you play as an eldritch abomination that’s about to be devoured by another unthinkable creature. Good news is you are pretty crafty and know how to jump dimensions to escape your ghastly fate; bad news is, you’re now stuck on Earth, trapped inside a dumb human larva.
As years go by, you realize the amount of energy you need to leave this horrible dimension behind is a lot more than you had expected. Not to mention the creature that almost ate you all those years ago never really stopped looking for you. But there’s no way it’ll pin point your actual location… right?
What you can expect from this story:
- Heavily character driven.
- ROs. As of now I have 4 (1 female, 1 male, 2 gender flippable).
- I wouldn’t say my story is a romance, but if you like talking to NPCs, well, there’s lot of that.
- Weird reality bending powers (eventually).
- Creepy stuff. I love horror, mostly the subtle sort that gives you goosebumps. Hopefully some parts will read like that.
- I’m still throwing things against the wall and seeing what sticks, just so you know.
What you won’t get:
- Micromanaging. I suck at those.
- Random outcomes. You have the prologue to build your MC’s attributes.
- A story that relies too much on its stats. Sometimes. Ok, I’m still working on that.
- Lovecraftian prose. I steal a lot from Howard Phillips, his prose he can keep.
What I’m looking for:
- People to read it, first and foremost.
- Grammar mistakes, coding errors (“it says he instead of she”), etc.
- Are there odd sentences? (answer: yes)
- Things you’ll probably find and I haven’t thought about.
Here’s the demo: https://dashingdon.com/go/3518
1/1/19: Demo’s date of release. Prologue and Chapter 1 (26.585 Word count/12.110 on a single playtrough)
1/3/19: Corrected punctuation (I think I got them all), misspellings, and that odd sentence that was pointed out. Polished Teen!Livvy’s dialogue (hopefully it’s a little less awkward now
but I’m an awkward person so). Took out the stat-based nonsense on that first conversation with Fiama; if you’re nice to her, she’ll be nice to you. Changed the color of the titles. Added the option to write down your own pronouns if you’re playing as a non-binary MC.
2/14/19: Chapter 2 is up. The WIP is now 59.131 words long, with an average of 21.900 per playthrough.
4/10/19: Chapter 3 is up. The WIP is now 91.630 words long, with an average of 32.632 per playthrough.
4/17/2019: Corrected grammar, added some of @sharknap’s suggestions—some others to be added later on—tweaked some variables; hopefully all continuity errors have been squashed.
TW: mentions of drug use; mild cursing; sex themes; it gets gory; descriptions of corpses rotting away (CH2); claustrophobia (CH3).