I doubt that rape victims in particular play this game Red and it wouldn’t be any different from an orphan reading about a guys parents that were murdered although I agree rape and murdered parents are overdone.
Also what happened to the mother in this story?
@Beelzlebub, there’s really no way for you to prove that, though. IMO it’s always better to be on the safe side.
As attolia says, you can’t prove that rape victims won’t be playing this. They like cyoa games too, and including something like that is really uncool, and both of those tragedies are not really comparable? Everyone has different experiences and rape is a very sensitive subject that should not be invoked in a story, period.
But yeah, please include a gender option. If possible, could you also add a gender neutral option, please?
I sufered a rape attempt so i dont like read rape attempts , but i could understand that real life vigilantes or people that think could make their own justice, reasons are 99% assassination near people, a attack normaly with sex involved Jealousy …I mean that is how world work. No one become vigilante because a rain of ponies and rainbowns . @Redrose i wont want read a rape i reported a wip exactly for doing a rape apology . But relate how a victim suffers i think is good to stop seeing rape as hot in that horrible erotic stories. Dont talk about jap hentai i want to kill some of this authors vigilante style.
I am sorry that had to happen to you.
However, I don’t think that that is a necessary aspect to incorporate into this fictional story. You can have bad things happen to the protagonist, but that doesn’t have to be one of them.
Has anyone heard of the term don’t like don’t read?
Besides the point I am sorry that you had to go through that Mara but as long as there is a warning before the story starts it should be fine to put in a story.
Yes exactly @Beezlebub a warning mature content and violence would be needed when character start kill and that .
Hey folks.
I’m reading the comments, but I’d ask for people to drop the rape talk, please? 
I think you can rest at ease knowing that if I do add a gender option, being raped won’t be a background choice (right now, I’m leaning towards having the background mostly pre-defined for story reasons with the choices you make during the story determining what you experience, but it doesn’t mean I will never include background choices). That’s not to say that if you play a female character (again if I do it), it won’t be a possibility, considering the type of world I’m exploring. You folks should really be careful regarding what you request as far as I’m concerned. 
My goal is to make you uncomfortable, to think and to potentially feel while adding social commentary. It’s very much an adult story, hence the note I left in the intro, though I doubt I’ll include sex (if a strip club is explored or something, maybe potential nudity will be briefly referenced but not glorified). Everything else is pretty much fair game for me, but I can assure you there will be a good reason for including whatever I do. If I do use the situation described, should I allow you to play as a female character, I can assure you that I’ll do my best to make it work. But it’s only ‘if’ and I wouldn’t assume I’m going to do so. The most you’ll probably run into is an abused female who you can help out. I do have that in mind already. (I do suggest you read the stories on Wattpad that I linked to. They’ll give you a real feel for what I might want to do with this story)
@Beelzebub I don’t think I mentioned a mother? I will try to explore the character’s mother at some point though, and other potential family members.
By the way, I will try to expand on the father’s death more as I go on. I’m planning on making it a pretty major plot point, though depending on if I make it optional content, you might miss out on it (I want to really include a lot of branching here). It could change anyway, especially if people really don’t feel it after I’ve worked on the story more. Currently, I don’t actually have a roadmap with being a pantster. I just have a broad idea of what I want to do in my head.
At the end of the day, I’ve got a lot of work to do with just starting this yesterday and I can’t believe the amount of errors I’ve missed in the text. I self-edit and have done freelance editing before, so . . . it really stings when I notice that I’ve missed things. I did a pretty sloppy job here.
Also, while I’ve not added new content, I have fixed some errors and outside of the intro, I’ve gone through the text and removed every instance of ‘my’, ‘I’ etc. and replaced it with a second person narrative. So, if you see ‘my’ or ‘I’ outside of dialog, please do let me know. It’ll mean I’ve missed it.
Edit: Also, one thing I should say is that while I’m wanting to do my best to keep it gritty and realistic, it is possible that it might take on a kind of super-hero vibe. Albeit a non-powered one, depending on how you play. I’m going to try to build in options for you to own assets, invest in things, and potentially put a group together should you so desire. After all, it’s pretty hard to wage a one-man war on crime, especially without any money or equipment. But if you’re going to try and get said cash, how will you do so and if you turn to unsavoury means, how does that reflect on you as a character?
K.
@DavidGil
Errors for your review -
When I Beat him senseless: “I’m fine, and don’t you worry about him. You should go home.” She nods. “All right… and thank you. The world needs more people like you.”
~ Go home, but on the way, dive into the nearest phone booth and call for an ambulance, realising it’s probably not a good idea to use your mobile.
~ Go home, but on the way, dive into the nearest phone booth and call for an ambulance, realising that it’s probably not a good idea to use your mobile.*(Same wording as 1st option But when I choose this one I DON’T call an ambulance.)
After choosing my alias if I Chose to go to Eaton I get this error - Line 131: invalid indent, expected at least one line in ‘if’ true block.
Verbiage:
You think about grabbing my (*your) baseball bat, but you opt not to.
Confident that your identity will hopefully be kept secret for now thanks to the hood and the darkness, you grab my (*your) keys, open the door and lock up, then think about where you want to go for your first ‘patrol’.
You just have you (*your) skills and experience to rely on, for the most part, because you know that you’ve brought the gun with you mostly as a cautionary method.
“Try it,” you say, and as he lunges forward, you bring my (*your) fist up on the inside of his outstretched arm and strike him on his chin.
You make up my (*your) mind to do something about the city’s corruption and crime for yourself because you’ve longed to do something about the rampant crime and corruption.
You make up my (*your) mind to do something about the crime and corruption that’s running rampant in the city, because it’s the right thing to do.
Thanks, @Piggleywinks ! I’ll have a look at what you mentioned. Working on it some now.
I thought I’d fixed the alley/old woman parts, as it’s what I referenced when I mentioned sloppy editing/writing and fixing errors, but obviously not, unless I just didn’t update the dropbox file. The other parts I wasn’t aware of though.
So, I’ll see about updating those errors now as soon as I’ve fixed them so people aren’t reading something that’s error strewn. But the next update will be as perfect as I can get it. I showed this way too early in all honesty. A mistake on my part. I’m guessing scenes may need a fair bit of rewriting too and hopefully that will help with people not liking the father part.
Anyways, again thanks! Greatly appreciated.
Edit: Well, the Eaton error is fixed. I didn’t know I had to indent the *if statement and the rest, with it just displaying text if you chose to beat the mugger.
Edit 2: What was mentioned should be fixed now. Again, many thanks!
Along with that there was also an error for the ganglands maybe that is eaton but also nowhere in particular love the game though
@BrandonbigK Thanks! I’ll have a look when I can. The next update might take a while, but it’ll be sizeable and I want to make sure it’s right.
There is a typo with having a first person article after you go home and refuse the bat you use me instead of you’re. also maybe there should be a flashback scene(s) that help to flesh out the character and his/ her relationship with father and what kind if man he was with some pro’s and con’s about him. Also can it be possible to get a sidekick like robin or unite the neighborhood under your rule if you are effective enough or are charming/diplomatic enough? Also how brutal can you be like punisher brutal or pissed Spider-Man brutal. Note one regularly kills and tortures criminals while the other beats them into near comas. Yes the fist scene may be used to justify how you act but that’s just one instance. Also for the mother I could suggest that she is still alive but was away or divorced and that could add some further development to the story. How comic are you getting with this I mean how much fantasy is there like are we fighting vampires and muggle crime lords or are we just fighting muggle’s which are already monstrous enough.
Hello, @Lubu343 .
First of all, thanks for the comments. I’m heavily reworking this at the moment and I was hoping no-one would bump it as I posted this way too soon (I’m basically starting after the funeral service has ended and going from that point onwards, removing the mugger bit). 
I can at least give some info on what I plan to do with the new version in order to answer your questions. (I should probably remove this file from dropbox too, so no-one leaves feedback as this version isn’t relevant, though I guess I could always upload what I have of the new version. It’s just that there’s not much and it’s very rough.)
Anyways:
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I intend to allow you to choose whether to be a lone wolf or work as a team. If anything, you might feel more pushed towards working in a team for story reasons. But again, my intent, if I can make it work, is to allow you to go solo if you wish. Of course, it would make things more difficult.
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It won’t be possible to unite neighborhoods etc. under your rule. You’re pretty much penniless at the beginning and it’s not your goal, but I hope to give the option to invest in things, so you can get an income stream and gadgets. Afterall, you can’t really wage war without money. It might just come down to setting up a business anyway, like a security firm, considering the main character’s skills. Failing that, you might have to resort to robbing at first (depends on how I go about it really).
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I intend for it to be an adult story, as it’s mostly what I write. So, swearing, violence will be present. Sex? No. Highly unlikely, unless there’s a very good reason for it. In other words, expect it to be gritty and no punches pulled when it comes to violence. But you can choose whether you go too far or not. And well, if you do go too far, you’ll have the police to worry about. You’ll likely have to worry about them even if you don’t, but they’ll be especially hard on you if you’re leaving corpses lying around.
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I’m not fully sure on fantasy elements. I might include the odd super-villain with . . . well, similarities to some of the villains out of comics. But my goal is to always keep it as realistic and gritty as possible. So, expect most of the villains to be human, if not all.
Well, that’s the end of the answers. Again, thanks for the feedback, but I’m just sorry that I’m heavily reworking this. I wish you could edit posts after 30 minutes as well.
I’m working on a fair few projects as well. One of them is a fantasy/horror/post-apocalyptic type western story, which is essentially a reworking of a story I have on Wattpad. With it, I’m looking to put the focus squarely on characters, relationships, story and choices, while removing stats (aside from the relationship ones). I’ll handle the branching by making use of a lot of true/false variables, and by using the relationship scores. I’m tempted to apply it to this story too, so stats like temper will be gone. I might strip the second person narrative from this also. I know people want it in and to be able to choose their character, but I feel a better story can be told with a set character. whose personality you can mold and guide while still being faithful to the character I have in mind.
The fantasy one is called Lockhart anyway. I’ll probably have it ready in a few days, but I’ll only post it once I’m happy with it and I have at least the first chapter complete. It’s written from the first perspective too, with a set character.
One thing I do want to stress though is that I’m very much working on games with a second person narrative, without set characters. So, I’m not totally opposed to it. It just depends on whether I intend for a project to be story heavy or not.