Unreliable Narrator (humor, fantasy)

Style: Dennis Miller writing The Chonicles of Narnia as posts on his social justice Tumblr blog.

This is just a small part of what I hope will be a full sized game. There are a lot of references and I expect most people will only catch half of them (but different ones for every person).

Warning: Swearing, Innuendo

https://dashingdon.com/go/2527

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It might just be me, but I found this really difficult to read. :sweat_smile:

I realise this might be on purpose, and a stylistic choice to go with the genre.
But, I’d probably give up rather quickly, if it continues on the same way. :confused:

Do you mean unfamiliar words or the sentence structure or something else?

I feel you nailed the unreliable narrator part of the story, with the seemingly smooth incorporation of contradictions (the Machiavelli part especially got me thinking), unfulfilled expectations, and parody.

I don’t think I understood half of the references, but they a) reinforced the narrator’s character and b) still had some stand-alone meaning, so it was overall quite enjoyable :+1:

Would be interested in seeing where this goes, since the tone doesn’t seem too sustainable…

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There is no otter way! :fearful:

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This is The Room’s level of absurdity where it’s so bad, it’s kind of enjoyable

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Heh this is new-ish. I do find your writing entertaining! Interesting at the very least. (When used in another format it could definitely make for great dialogue.)

Tightening the flow of the story some more would be wonderful as right now it comes off as a tad jumbled and messy.

I definitely want it tighter. Ultimately, everything should be as well worded as the description for MuleHan Luke.

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