I really like the slow pacing of this, and the whole seemingly average normal atmosphere of the game makes the strange and magical things that more interesting. Also, if we choose to be a straight woman (picking the ‘ex boyfriends’ choice) will all the 6 ROs be male?
None of the ROs are gender-flippable from what I’ve seen. So if you pick to play as a straight woman you’ll only be able to romance the male ROs and get locked out from romancing the female ROs.
Hey, this is great! I almost forgot all about the fact that fairies would be involved LOL. This borders on slice-of-life, just you going about the motions until you can leave and go do something in your degree field haha. I’m very excited to get into the magic elements of the story
Once upon a time I also worked in an amusement park and this game has me both parts relieved I left and amused since I used to go though so many feelings the MC currently goes through while employed.
I can’t wait to see how the game continues!
I just wanna know what happens when trying to climb into your window.
Thank you for your feedback too! I appreciate hearing both sides of slower pacing vs faster pacing, and I think I’ll wait and see how Chapter 3 goes before cutting anything. As @Fay said, if you play as a straight woman, you will have 3 RO options of the guys. The genders of the ROs do not change depending on the MC’s sexuality.
Thanks for answering a question for me!
I’m glad you liked my demo so far! I feel like that’s my favorite part of magical realism - sometimes you can even forget that there are magical elements involved. I’ll see if I need to change anything in future updates, but lulling the MC into a false sense of security is a part of my plan.
Aw, I’m glad you found it accurate! I myself have never worked in a park, although many of my friends currently do, and I’m trying to use them as sources. I hope you continue to enjoy the game as I update!
If your MC has enough Athletics to climb the trellis, they realize that there’s no way for them to get in unless they break the window. If your MC doesn’t have high enough Athletics, they give up half way. Hope this helps!
Yep that helps!!
Hi everyone! It’s been a busy couple of weeks for me, but I just wanted to thank everyone for 3K+ demo plays and nearly 300 likes! I’m always happy to see how people respond to my work, and I hope you all enjoy the next update!
The next update will contain Chapter 3, as well as refining the stats page. My current draft for the Chapter is 4.5k words, and I estimate its finished state will be 15k.
Hello! August is here, and with it, Chapter 3! This chapter is almost 10k in length, and of course, picks up where Chapter 2 left off. The size of the playable demo is now 41k.
MC has an interesting night, and we finally meet the last two ROs! (Teddy and Bridget are eternally patient with me.) Warning: this chapter contains thriller/supernatural horror aspects and mild violence. Nothing too drastic, though, but better safe than sorry.
- Chapter 3
- Bug fixes, spacing errors, grammar stuff.
- Relationship stat refining.
What I’m looking for in terms of feedback:
- Spelling errors, bug fixes, grammar improvement.
- Thoughts on the chapter’s mood
- Feedback on my writing style
- Anything else you feel like bringing up!
I hope you guys like the update! (I’m going to go back to playing Fire Emblem now…)
I’m so excited to play it!! Have fun with your FE! (Three Houses?)
You’re using American dates right? Like August/fourth/2020 instead of fourth/August/2020
Love what I’m reading! All the little details help just make it! The new chapter was fantastic, One thing I did notice though, after leaving the office after searching the desks and lockers there’s the line:
“You draw your true a little tighter around yourself”
Thought that might be a typo? Sorry I don’t know how to post screenshots of it.
Edit: The page where you choose to head north to Promenade Plaza or west to Olympus if that helps!
Oh gosh I loved the update! I specially liked the way you introduced the creature and the attack! And I really liked that the MC is freaked out that they actually recognize the people around them. Or the moment where they get their keys and just straight up faint. I actually laughed at that, just imagining the scene from the outside. This person who has just been attacked by SOMETHING (is it a harpy? I feel like it’s a harpy but I’m probably wrong lmao) simply stands up, grabs their keys, looks proud af, and then passes out. Loved it. Keep up the good work!
Made me laugh too! Now I’m just picturing the MC after the attack when the others are staring at them just shaking their head slowly and blurting out “nope!” before keeling over. Also I just thought it was a really damn ugly faerie
I cannot get enough of this WIP. Well done!
Thank you so much! Yes, I’m playing Three Houses - Blue Lions right now. Annette owns my heart. I hope you liked my demo! I’d love to know your thoughts.
Yes, all of my dates are listed Month/Date/Year.
Thanks for catching that typo! I’m really glad you liked this chapter! Your conversation with Ceres made me laugh, because that’s pretty much how it went. More about the winged creature will be explained in the next chapter, but it is fae.
Thank you so much for leaving your feedback, it was great to see! ^^ Everyone that MC’s met so far has been a bit of a weirdo. Poor MC is going through a lot, and fainting after an adrenaline rush is definitely not making their day any better. (Imagine being Alejandro or another bystander watching MC keel over.) I’m happy to hear you liked this chapter!
Aw, thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed it!
Thanks for catching that error! I’ll have it fixed in the next update. Hope you liked the rest of your play through.
Super excited about this update! I want to officially meet everyone!!! What a way to reunite or meet with ro’s! Fighting a monster and then passing out! Whew, my MC needs to be held until she feels better. I wonder who she’d want to do that…
Nice update! The banshee/fairy appearance and build up were a ton of fun to read. Really drove home that we were out alone at night in a big park. I also liked that the different paths in the office (lockers vs desks) would give different clues (and more mysteries).
Just had to say this about my new favorite plotline:
Noooo. Say it ain’t so. Has he not suffered enough? (It’s probably bad that I laughed at this but that’s what I did) Truly, a man of many mishaps.
Really liking your take on the fae, especially the little lore crumbs we’ve been given so far. Hoping for more in the future!
Hi Dankman! It’s nice to see you again. Thanks for catching the typo, it should be fixed in the next update.
I’m glad you liked the update. I can’t lie, I love writing slice-of-life mundane chapters, but having the fae finally show up was a relief.
This is Mitchell’s story, fam. You’re just living in it.
I just got through this, and wanted to say that I really enjoyed it! It’s a cool premise, and I think you do a good job setting it up. Looking forward to what you do next!
lots of words incoming
I thought it was really cool that you got to sort of get a tour of the park yourself by watching the MC lead one, and interacting with the tourists was cool, and you did a great job of describing it.
The characters felt pretty distinct while all being likable. I’m looking forward to seeing how things pan out with them, and who else I have yet to meet. I did think it was a little odd that the manager guy Lawrence had a disposition meter separate from the others, but I guess it makes sense in the context of your relationship being more of a business one.
I personally tend not to like"you do the thing but have four choices of how you feel about it", but most of the examples in your story felt pretty natural and like they were meaningfully different interactions, so I’m actually really happy with how you handled that overall. For example, you always watch the silly TV show with Julia, but the different choices still felt like they framed a different relationship between them.
I played a gay male and I felt like the narration was going a little overboard on the “you think Alejandro is totally hot”, but only a little and it didn’t really bug me too much because it’s true. I also appreciate that I could play as being attracted to him without being super flirty and forward about it.
I didn’t notice any typos at all in my playthrough. The closest thing I can think is during the bits talking about the phone battery, I think it went up at one point? (from 18 to 23). I might have just misread/misremembered the values though. I felt like the scenes flowed really well, and I think you did a great job at handling the tones in both the normal day parts and the dramatic part.
Again, it was a great read and I had fun playing.