Time Warden (WIP, Update 7/27)

How is gender gonna influences the story.

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That’s a very broad question. Care to narrow it down a bit? :grin:

I meant that back then men were warriors. So it would be interesting to see how they react to woman warden. I mean she’s big, but still just a woman in their eyes.

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Lol you might be surprised to hear that there were women samurai as well who fought and while not common their is documented in historical records of a few. Not to say they wouldnt face what you speak of I just suspect there would be issues for other reasons for more likely to be in the forefront.

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Actually there were plenty of female warriors in Japan at the time. They were referred to as Onna-musha. Here is a brief blurp on the topic.

Onna-musha (女武者) is a term referring to female warriors in pre-modern Japan. These women fought in battle alongside samurai men. They were members of the bushi (samurai) class in feudal Japan and were trained in the use of weapons to protect their household, family, and honour in times of war. They also have an important presence in Japanese literature, with Tomoe Gozen and Hangaku Gozen as famous and influential characters examples representing onna-musha .

There were also Besshikime ([別式女], lit. “other-style women”), female guards of the harems and residences of the wives and concubines of Daimyo and clan leaders.

So being a woman is not what they would be raising brows at. It would be more the glowing eyes, flawless skin, and just otherworldliness of the Warden in general.

Here’s a link to Wikipedia on the subject if you’re interested Onna-musha - Wikipedia

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Both this game and Knights of Evallon have made me realize that I’m really into ROs who are single mothers.

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sage nod We need love too :grin:

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hmmmm i feel like the mc is too much of their own character which is not necessarily bad but still a bummer for me. i also think that there are too few choices considering the fact that this is supposed to be, you know, an interactive novel.

the lack of punctuations in many places bothers me too…

but i like the plot and am excited to see where this is going :slight_smile:

I absolutely love it! This is the second project i encounter where the MC travel back in time while making ourselves feel like aliens in our own home planet. Too bad that it ends in such a cliffhanger, I’m looking forward to putting those arrogant bastards to their place which is beneath my armored feet.

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Wouldn’t exactly call the Takeda arrogant, stop putting modern standards on characters from a bygone era why can’t this forum understand that simple concept. Anyway I love the story so far, I disagree with the other guy about the lack of choices as well the choices all felt impactful and well placed. If you plan to use real historical figures I suggest you do some extensive research on whoever you plan to use, my personally suggestion would be Nagao Kagetora. He was a rather powerful daimyo in that time period and had a heated rivalry with the Takeda clan who seem to be one of the villains of the story. Of course this is just a suggestion feel free to ignore it or use it if you like I will love the story regardless.

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This is just Fumiko’s personal opinion on the subject, you get to know them later.

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Whew, just finished my first playthrough of the demo and I have to admit that I’m absolutely enamored with it ! The writing and pacing feels natural and the writing is lovely !

I can’t wait to read your future updates ! Keep up the good work :slight_smile:

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So far this was definitely a fun read, there were a few errors and such I noticed though
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Alright so is this supposed to be the Kiara in the post? If not having two characters whose names are one letter apart might be a bit confusing (reading through all of the game it looks like you just mispelled her name in the original post).

One thing as well is that at least the relationship stats jump around alot, in my opinion at least it would seem more organic if there were more instances where the relationship changes by a smaller amount. (Like kairas relatinship jumping by 15 on a 1-100 scale from one seemingly minor choice.)

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While I get the joke thicc is maybe not the ideal choice of words to describe someones build

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Should be entire

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should be while

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“act the way it did” sounds better imo

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tell should be telling

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Id say this could be phrased a bit better, maybe "she has been deemed so dangerous due to her intellect and disregard for human life
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Im guessing you mean either “and rub your temples” or “run your fingers through your hair” because it kinda sounds like you mixed both.
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there is an s missing after hope
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is should be it’s
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This one should be Nights instead of Night’s
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should be either “system finishes” or “systems finish”
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should be diminished instead of demished
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it should be before in
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Should be procession instead of precession but string also works

Hope this didn’t come of as too nitpicky I definitely enjoyed the story and am looking forward what else you’ll do with it and the world (I would definitely kiss Nobunaga) and Im also looking at my mass murdering inmate very respectfully :eyes:

A wee bit, but I am very nitpicky myself so I appreciate it :laughing:

I do appreciate the feedback so thank you :heart:

omg…I totally forgot that was still in there!!! I tossed it in as a joke for myself well I was making the choice list and totally forgot about it!

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Will you be making portraits of the RO’s in artbreeder and upload it here, author? And will poly be a option?

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:thinking:
Good questions. I have used art breeder before points to pfp but I’m not sure. I know I will be looking into commissioning some stuff once I find an artist I like.

As for poly, yes it will be possible, I couldn’t call myself poly and NOT include the option in my work lol

Current options will be
*Fumiko/Kai
*Fumiko/Haruto
*Fumiko/Lani
*Kai/Lani
*Kai/Haruto
*Annabelle/Lani

Edit: Before anyone asks, no Annabelle/Kai will not ever be possible due to story reasons

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By Kai you mean Kia right? Fumiko X MC X Kia poly romance route.:heart_eyes::heart_eyes::heart_eyes:

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Lol, yes, sometimes my fingers go to fast and hit the a before the i loool

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Oh yeah… Will the MC be able to have children as well in the epilogue too? And maybe could you please add “Brown eyes” in the options.

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Yep you got me in this too.

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