The Wight King(WIP - REVAMPED) cliffhanger intensifies mini-update - half of chapter 1 done (12/05/2018)



I got DEBUG:7 …


DEBUG: 7 with pure brute force is what I got


I also got 8 with finesse


Debug: 7

Brute Force


Debug 7 (more letters)


Debug 8 with finesse


Debug 7 with brute force


If I’m not mistaken, it’s 9. So, eight or seven are very nice damage, but some paths also inflict more damage against you. The only path that gets you nine also heavily wounds you.



heck yes.


DEBUG:8 This number indicates how grave the damage you inflicted to Asterius were. If you could communicate me this number, it would help me, and also you can compare how well you did with the other readers :3
I don’t think it’s possible to deal 9 damage by the way, 8 is the max.


DEBUG:4 This number indicates how grave the damage you inflicted to Asterius were. If you could communicate me this number, it would help me, and also you can compare how well you did with the other readers :3


Debug: 7 is what I got. Having a great time so far.


I got debug 8. Looking forward to more.


Will the MC learn to use magic spells/enchantments? Also will it ever be possible to learn holy/light magic like templars? It would be amusing to see people react to an undead using holy magic


Debug 6. Danggit! But very nice fight scene! I loved it!


Magic, yes. But not usual magic, the Wight King is not a mage, they haven’t been teached to use it. They have an innate understanding of primal magic. During their life the Wight King was always magically active, but magic manifested late into them and it took the form of a powerful but very rough use of it. At first, they could only use their magic to enhance themselves as a warrior.

Holy magic is typically unusable by the undead, it would be counter-nature.


Is the berserk ability a part of your magic? Will you have any sort of ability that can match Asterius


Your revision is coming along nicely, the fighting scenes writing is top notch! Although I didn’t quite understand to what stat apply “fast movement” choises. Skill?
Another thing I wondered is if in future chapters you could play as a merciful char without leaving a ton of corpses in your wake? :upside_down_face: The ruthless and more neutral paths are a blast to play though.

Not sure if you want typos, but here you go anyway:


And just as I struck, the darkness cracked, filling with it’s incoherent fury.


every bone and articulation emitting groans of disapprovement and worrying snapping.


The stone groaned cracked, accompanying the screech of metal being bent and torn, it must be what kept the lid shut. It was getting too noisy for my liking, And the sound would grow even more if I continued to go slowly.

“groaned and cracked, accompanied by the screech” ?
‘A’ in ‘and’ in lower case.

And even as it cleared, my voice still was dry and hissing, unrecognisable


I’m not your enemy. Let me pass and I won’t trouble you any more.

One word adverb referring to time

WIth my strength even a sword this size weighed nothing.

second letter lower case

The highly defensible way this place was built would maker it much harder


in the screech of benting steel, the door caved outward.


onto the faceplate of his helmet, spewing sparks as his face grinded against the it.

no need for “the”

I swung the wheel around before loosing it from my hand


The templar only add the time to loose a “Holy shit!”

had the time to let loose

And just as his two halves fell, It turned to see one of the two left charging at me.


Ready to tear apart even an helping hand
An hecatomb

I swept at the templar’s legs with my sword forcing him to jump back.

There are multiple instances of this.

Okay, standing against his assaults put me into a position to the choose the ground

+In a position?

Even veterans tend to forget that their is more than a pointy end on their sword.


feinting and using his shield more as a second weapon than a for his protection.

I think you can safely remove highlighted section

but I denied each of his strikes with once of my own … … Even though her replied for each strike with one of his own

One/He. How about “parried each strike” here?

British english forms are intentional, I presume?


I don’t think you can be merciful when they keep attacking you. My MC was very diplomatic and let the survivor go (and also didn’t kill that girl) but I still killed a whole lot of templars. And fast attacks are based on the power stat I think, basically power means your physical abilities (strength, speed etc) and skill means outsmarting your enemy, throwing things, using distractions etc


Ah, alright. That makes sense then, stats wise.

Yeah, at the beginning of the book, I’m okay with that. What I wonder about is later down the line, maybe you’ll begin to find ways to tactically avoid large violent confrontations and/or use some other methods to achieve your goals. Not sure if it’ll go well with the theme, but who knows.