The "Why Are You (Feeling Emotion)" Thread


#851

That’s another piece of really good advice, if you have a character you like, with a distinctive voice, they’ll often write themselves if you let them. Sometimes when I was lost for what to write I’d just say, ‘okay, these two characters are going to talk now’ and words would just fly by. It gets you writing, which gives you a sense of progress, which makes you feel better about attempting the tricky stuff.


#852

whispers we’re allowed to advertise our fanfiction here? Omg, I’ve been writing fanfic for 12 years!

I’m hot pink rose (aka ashestoroses018) on the pseudo-defunct Lunaescence Archives (is it ever coming back? I hope so. I have some unbacked up work on there), ashestoroses018 on AO3 (hey-ohhhh Star Wars, MysMes and kpop fanfic lmao not even ashamed anymore), and ashestoashes on AFF (NOT adult-fanfiction. The other one)

That being said: lmao i feel guilty. A guy I’ve been really enjoying texting asked me to grab lunch with him today…at like 10:30 this morning. I didn’t see it until 5 in the afternoon.

wOOPS THIS IS WHY I DON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND LMAO


#853

If you’re writing fanfic about real people, you might find yourself distrusted by the part of fandom writers who believe that is taboo.


#854

If someone wanted to start up a general fan fiction topic, where people could post links to their fan fiction I can’t see why anyone would have an issue with it.

Note that’s links to fan fiction and not posting actual fanfiction here (unless it’s Choice of Games/Hosted Games specific).

You can also add links to your websites in your profile if you want.


#855

Maybe one day I will wrote Tellius fanfiction under a false name… :pray::pray::pray::pray::pray::pray: brainfog please leave me i have so many ideas

Honestly I’ve written so many ideas for fanfiction for so many games and books but my brain just dies before I get it written down like. Thx brain


#856

And I’ve never once cared :slight_smile: (lol thats a lie. I used to, when I was like 13. Then I got over myself.)

I’m not writing it as if they’re real people, though they are. I use their stage personas. 99% chance they aren’t actually the way they act for fans.

I literally could not care less if people don’t respect it :slight_smile: i used to care, but now I don’t :slight_smile:

Oh also, this just suddenly reminded me: Zico, from Block B, is actually disappointed in his fans that there isn’t a plethora of erotic fanfic about him, so…lmfao


#857

I’ll get onto that. Count on the dragon with the heart of the moon.
EDIT: got it up and running here’s the link Fanfiction Thread


#858

I am feeling really lonely. Everyone who has talked to me lately has wanted something from me. To solve their problems, to sleep with me, to write more of my things tailored just for them.

I should be grateful that they see some value in me. It would be worse to not be asked for my opinions, my help, to be seen as someone that people don’t want to talk to at all. But whenever people demand more from me, I don’t feel wanted in that moment, I just feel more stress and it paradoxically makes me less able to deliver what they need.

And sometimes I try to help, and the one bad experience outweighs all of the good I manage to do. I can feel alone in a room full of ten admirers. And I know how emo and entitled I sound right now, but I can’t help suffering over pointless bullshit. I just need a friend. And I’m bad at friends. It’s honestly my fault I don’t have more.

I don’t know, I’m depressed. I want to get back to coding. I want more than anything to do that. I’m looking for someone to tell me it’s not just excuses, but it probably is. When I say I’m not suffering, I’m downplaying what the world does to people. When I’m stoic and say I’m doing okay, the people I tend to like say I’m lying about how bad it is.

I want to make games, but I’m just barely surviving. I’m an introvert, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want someone, somewhere to know and understand me.


#859

I feel isolated.

Things have been ‘bad’ for the last year or so but things are finally getting better. I have always had friends and family to lean on. I still do but i feel isolated and helpless. I dont think i should things are looking up as i said and i still have friends and family but for some reason now when i dont need help i feel isolated and helpless.


#860

Angry at myself, I suppose.

For being petty, for procrastinating, for not being smart enough, influential enough, and for just being plain dumb. I can’t even continue to write my story because I constantly put if off. And when I do get to it, I go into “hyper editing” mode. I know that major writing blogs say to let yourself write crap but I guess I just can’t? I’m doubting the field that I want to go into, after years of being absolutely enchanted with it.

I’m frustrated that I can’t drive but slightly happy that I’m getting off my epilepsy medicine after two years of taking it.

I initiate and elongate pointless arguments. I focus too much on myself, and though I recognize this, I rarely do anything about it(I know I probably shouldn’t be complaining about this when I realize what the problem is, but idk.)

You ever get that feeling where you just want to grab a pillow and scream?

Wow. It’s a wonderful time to be 18.


#861

Feeling a few things, mostly more happy and more…secure I guess? Still exploring my gender, but got to the stage now where I feel comfortable enough to go out in my neighbourhood dressed, in an androgenous female way I guess?(sorry if I got the wording wrong) As in women’s clothes, but nothing overtly traditionally feminine such as a skirt or what not, most feminine sort of thing I wear is jeggings :stuck_out_tongue: . But feeling happy as finally have an end goal in sight. Aiming to eventually dress in that way all the time, as I still feel more comfortable dressed like that, though this also makes me feel anxious/that I have to be ready to anticipate a negative reaction and be able to handle it, I haven’t gotten one yet, but I’m sure I will eventually, even if it’s rare, but it at least feels like a realistic goal, where as before it didn’t. And although I still feel comfier yet when dressed in more traditionally feminine clothes , I now feel sure that I wouldn’t want to present in that way in public unless I was 100% sure of my motivations(E.G wanting to transition, just prefer to dress like that but no plan to transition etc)as I have a short term end in sight, but not an eventual/long term one if that makes sense? :stuck_out_tongue: Still want to push myself to present fully at trans groups though, as I feel it’d be easier to get across that I haven’t got everything figured out, but this too seems achievable now :slight_smile: .

Still not sure how long it’ll take for me to figure things out though. not sure if I said, but kind of a hypocondriac thought I’ve had cancer, autism, a heart attack(my panic attack) and broken bones before(though my paranoia does ironically keep me in good health :stuck_out_tongue: )so still not sure if this is a permanent part of me or just a symptom of that :confused: especially as I didn’t get therapy till late in life.

Because I now feel I have a definite end goal and know where I want to go at least somewhat, where as before I was just exploring not knowing where my exploration would take me at all, even seriously considering opening up about this issue with my dad or aunt now, though how to do so is another issue entirely :stuck_out_tongue: , but I at least feel confident I know what I’d want to get across :slight_smile: .


#862

Recently, I get easily angered and frustrated about certain situations at work. I’ve been working at that place for 4 years (5 in the coming months ). I think it always starts around later months of year to the early months of the new year. These were quite a busy season so I guess we could factor it in.

One office mate told me I might be suffering from depression due to my mood shifts but of course, he’s no psychologist though. One time I read that it’s a sign that I’m unhappy in my current situation. Of course, I want to manage my emotions but how do I do that? I feel really lost at times but my unhappiness evaporate once I get home though.


#863

That moment when you suddenly remember that “bloody” is a genuinely offensive word to many (real, not just by-marriage) Brits… after you’ve just used it about four times in conversation with a rather traditionally minded British missionary?

Yeah, I’m feeling mortified.


#864

Immense pain. Sprained my knee while bending to get something while exiting a vehicle. Somehow. Long story. My first ever injury, wasted on something stupid like a wrong twist of the knee while going out of public transportation.

Anyway, I can’t walk right now. I had to limp for a kilometer from the terminal all the way home, and no one at home wanted me to go to the hospital in front of house…because it costs too much. Plus, it’s just a sprain, they said. If i want to get it checked, better do it tomorrow at the university infirmary because it’s free. So it’s just the RICE method tonight.

But still, friggin’ hurts, man.


#865

Livid because I botched our performance of Hallelujah. It was meant to be a tribute to the man, and I botched it.


#866

Happy because I got to play BoTW on my new Switch. Sad because I spent 12 hours in line waiting for that damn thing and now I can hardly keep my eyes open. :confused::grin::cry:


#867

Ecstatic.

Tomorrow’s gonna be the official ‘Ditch Day’. Basically, we’re all gonna give our school the middle finger, and take a trip to the beach.

I’ve already skipped a shit ton of school, might as well skip some more.


#868

Super bored.

My computer went kaput and all I have is my phone and my dad’s shitty laptop. I decided to upgrade to a desktop and now I’m waiting for all my parts to… slowly… slowly ship to my house.


#869

Happy. Back to writing my entry for the comp after some difficulty.

Also, rainbow outside the window right now!


#870

Almost human again…
Bottoming out between prescriptions is something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

So hard to be motivated or even be moderately pleasant… I tend to be grumpy and moody and I really don’t like it.