The Prophecy (WiP)

Hello so I’ve been working on this little wip for sometime called The Prophecy. I’m rather new to the community and choice script coding so It’ll be a while until I find my ropes around it.

I intend for this to have multiple installments. Around three books

At the moment there is only the prologue which is around 2000+ words.

The Idea

You awaken out of a dream that seems all too familiar to you. Choosing to ignore it, you leave your dormitory to head to one of your morning classes, noticing the bleak atmosphere that you had noted only looks like this, on this day, every year since you could remember and a peculiar feeling that surges through your body, like something is calling out to you.

In class, things start to take a turn for the worst and your campus is thrown into chaos. The weird feeling you had before comes back in tend folds and you end up deep in a forest where you black out. When you awaken, you are met with a world of fantastical creatures and people, but the weirdest thing about it is that you are being called ‘The Prophecy’.

Without further a due the demo

https://dashingdon.com/play/wonderinglily/the-prophecy/mygame/

Features
  • Dive into the (hopefully) lore rich world, discovering the distinct and unique cultures and traditions of the Fennec species.

  • Form bonds; both romantic and platonic, with an ensemble cast of characters.

  • Learn about your past life and their deep, dark secrets or stop the onslaught of the painful ‘memories’.

  • Keep the bridge between the two realms balanced, so as to stop both realms from eating away at each other.

Changelog

12/21/2021

  • fixed some typos
  • changed a certain scene in the prologue

12/22/2021

  • fixed some typos
  • changed a few more scenes in the prologue and added some more responses and reactions.
RO’s

Will update when they are revealed, even though you can find them in the Interest Check thread.

Other Characters

Will update when they are revealed.

84 Likes

First thing I notice is a lot of typos and lack of punctuation. Seems like you rushed to get this out for some reason? Was there a deadline?

I found it incredibly weird that the MC would think to ask if someone who was not wearing medieval clothing was cosplaying as someone from medieval times. What year is this game set? Is it super far into the future, where someone might confuse 1990s fashion with 1100s fashion?

Firstly, no I’m not on a deadline, I guess when I read it over I didn’t realize the typos and secondly the mc is supposed to be transported to another world/realm where some of the people of that time wear clothes similar to people of medieval times but not necessarily based in it.

Thank you for the feedback by the way.

6 Likes

@frifli found this:

Uncaught Error: SaveMod: Unable to *sm_save before *sm_init

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Hm, well, the clothing you described isn’t similar at all to medieval times. I read it and think “this is straight out of 90s high school.”

thank you, i’ll get that fixed

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Ok, I guess I’ll change up that little bit then

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Yep caught some of those things as well but it shows promise and I’m looking forward to seeing more of the world and game :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

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the republic will watch your career with great interest :smiling_imp:

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Too many personality stats/traits will end up become snowball of huge workload for you in the future if you planning to make those stats matters

You’re right, I’m probably gonna take out the ‘skills’ variables and the
‘Talents’ variables aren’t important after the prologue (so I’m most likely gonna take that one out too)

Oi there @frifli this is true, there are crazy amount of typos and grammatical errors too…

Also MC’ reactions to everything feels completely kinda forced something… It feels like to every situation MC reacts the same way but the choices simply showing them in different emotions (or lock off)…

I’m not entirely sure what you mean by that.

I thought I fixed that, can you point me towards those?.

First typo

With wide eyes and a shaken body Javais store as he watched the life slowly drain from the body.

stared as he watched

2

are already up and turn off the alarm
You n͟o͟r͟m͟m͟a͟l͟l͟y͟ wake up before the clock

normally

3

The Professor continues the lesson on ‘Men in History’ but I cant’t seem to stay focused as I feel my body getting heavy,

can’t seem to stay

These are couple of the typos and there are many punctuation errors too…

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Oh I see thank you for these

I’ve never been good with punctuations but I’ll try and see if I can fix those

Also are you gonna explain/MC gonna ever know (find out) what the hell has happened in their own world? What the chaos is and all that?

Also lol

This, I feel like that was a weird thing to ask…

And why did MC react like everything is PERFECTLY alright being in some unknown place? And they even followed the strange guy in the woods who’s wearing strange clothes without even thinking of being against it?

Yes but please remember this is only the prologue

Lol reading this makes me laugh. This is why feedbacks are so important MC’s reaction does seem forced and weird.

Thank you for these.

Outside of the typos that others have pointed out I think it was good. I do agree that the choices feel slightly static as no matter how we react. Such as when we first wake up it doesn’t matter if we call out or not the response from the person that finds us is the same. Try changing up the responses a little bit. This is just the prologue so maybe you’re already working on that for the later chapters but that’s just something I noticed so far. Other than that it’s both an interesting concept & I look forward to playing more on the next update

Thanks for the feedback and I’ll try to fix our include more responses.

Waking up late only affects some of the responses of the professor.

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I fixed some typos and ended up adding more :expressionless:

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