The Oval Office : READ LAST POST

Things I noticed:

  • Regarding the background of one of the VP candidates, no matter what Trump does, people born in this country are legally and constitutionally citizens and cannot be deported under any circumstances, even if their parents are undocumented

  • “OK” should be in caps

  • Everyone knows what the President’s name is by the time he’s been elected. You need a better mechanic for that.

*Secret Service: The phrase should be “‘Only for your protection, sir,’ she grins.”

*“She” should not be capitalized where the driver does so; the second option on that page has a similar problem

*Leaving aside how absurd this outcome would be, it’s “Green Party”, not “Green Party Party”

*In various places, you misspell “choose” as “chose”

*In the description of the Dems, it should be “welfare…to those who need it”

*There need to be some commas in the GOP description; it’s unreadable as is.

*The Libertarian description should say “government should not bail out any companies”.

*The first page of chapter 1 is a mess and needs a lot of work.

*In the justice system goal, “many” should replace “several”

*The bit with the ChoiceScript game is bizarre and not funny. If it’s a joke, it’s not a good one. I’d say get rid of that entirely unless it’s an important subplot.

*If you choose to do the interview in a T-shirt and jeans, it says you’re naked.

*LOL at #ReasonsToLoveRussia

*ISIS wouldn’t have a school for girls - part of their whole thing is that women shouldn’t be educated. Maybe make it a place where ISIS captives were kept? Not to mention that ISIS is quite likely to be destroyed by 2020 anyway.

*“Not thirsty”? I’m not sure how to phrase what you’re getting at there, but that doesn’t work.

*Replace “hub-hub” with “hubbub”

*Replace “Iphone” with “iPhone” in the kiss scene

*Finally, a suggestion: add goals to raise, or to lower, defense spending.

*I love the idea of a POTUS who has approximately all the sex and doesn’t care who knows it, like JFK without the secrecy. Win.

8 Likes

A little note regarding your observation about the Shcool subject.
Women according to Islamic culture do not need to study, but even so in some countries that have a large concentration of Muslims in the population, or who have the Islamic religion present in their history or culture, they have schools or universities where there are female students, despite that the most conservative part of society does not support it. Taking into account that it is necessary to know how to read and write at least to live in society, whether Western or not. So even women who are not graduates, also have at least a basic education too in the in most cases, especially if the country had an infrastructure for it, something that Syria had in better conditions before the destruction bring by the civil war, and something that places like Somalia or Sierra Leone does not have.
Examples: Syria (before the civil war), nigeria (where the boko haram terrorists kidnapped several students for that reason).
In the distant past was not allowed, but in recent times things have undergone changes, even if slow, an example of this is the activist “Malala Yousafzai” who has already been attacked by the Taliban for defending the right of Muslim women to education, in contrast of it, in Saudi Arabia women can not take a driver’s license for example. As for the ISIS school, I do not think that it is necessarily belonging to the group or founded by it. I have seen in reports that the radicals have coerced children and others into being human shields of places important to ISIS, try to prevent the US-led coalition bombing the area, which they did not succeed in, since there were air strikes in those areas and collateral damages for civilian casualties as well, an example of this was a hospital of the humanitarian group “doctors without borders” which was hit by a bombardment of these.
So I think it makes sense the part of the school presented in the demo

2 Likes

Will there be option to see seats in senate and house ?

3 Likes

And Governors and state legislatures etc.

2 Likes

It would be too complicated to create characters for EVERY senator but I should be able to make about 3-5 prominent ones in the storyline.

4 Likes

I knew this game would be too ambitious for me :sweat_smile::sweat_smile::sweat_smile:

1 Like

I would sugggest just to go with party leaders and not get to much further into senate house and such for people description.

6 Likes

Why not just use the options for VP that you don’t pick to represent the parties and opposition?

3 Likes

Omg I’m soooo dumb why didn’t I think of this! It’s obviously the most logical solution if any. Thanks a lot!

2 Likes

Jeez I wish I had like a team of writers man. I’m soooo swamped beta testing for other games in addition to school work and personal life that I keep finding time slipping from me writing The Oval Office. I’m already wayyyy past schedule and I fear it’ll take even more time to release the next chapter.

I promise I’m trying my very best guys to get it to yall ASAP but it’s kinda draining on my sanity at this point :sweat_smile:. Rest assured I’m not quitting the story… And am almost sure I won’t ever… but I am just offering a lil update. Sooo sorry guys :disappointed:

13 Likes

I just played the game.
First thing is about romance. I chose to be 35 yr old and not married.
In the speechments, some choices came upon and none of they were for me. They were too troll, too serious and too romantic. The choices might be a little easier.
Second thing is that if this game’s gonna finish, then you have a long way to go my friend. You must work hard to make a great game because you have to study on policies that you put to the game. I hope they be good.

Last thing, i was at the final of the game and i chose to hug Jack for a goodbye, this was okey. But then 3 choices came. And they were “really bad”. I do not want any romance in a politic game, personally. But lots of choices were pushing me into the romance. I hope you fix them.

Wish you good luck.

4 Likes

I’d certainly work on it for free, in exchange for an “Executive Producer” credit, and perhaps a pretty big cameo. :wink:

5 Likes

Are you kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?

Wow. Just wow dude. Thank you for your generosity! I’ll send you a pm to discuss it :sweat_smile:

5 Likes

waitaminuteeeeee

HAS ANYONE IN THE WHOLE DANG WORLD SEEN @DUNGEON_MASTER?!?!?

CALLING @DUNGEON_MASTER
CALLING @DUNGEON_MASTER

WHERE DID MY FRIEND GO!?!?

6 Likes

Planet earth, sol system, Orion arm milky way Galaxy.
For more specific…India…
For more zen… the destination and path dungeon_master Follows.

5 Likes

As a joke you should just Add a Vice president option of Sheev Palpatine

4 Likes

Good so far, but my kids call me ‘S.’ Besides being their father and the President, I am a grown-ass man. :confused:

Incidentally, can backgrounds unlock different title options?

5 Likes

hey spyder I read that you need help writing this amazing game, so if you want I could help. and only favor from you would to mention me at the end at the very least.

3 Likes

Do not worry, mistakes and time constraints is something that anyone who is developing something gets in their way, in games is no exception.
Titles like Lords of Aswick, The Great Tournament, Guns of Infinity, Zombie Exodus Safe Heaven and many others took a long time to complete, and improved over time. For example the successor of Swamp Castle that is The Great Tournament surpassed its previous one in several aspects, the same we can say of Zombie Exodus and his sequel called Safe Heaven. But for this to happen it took a long time, and in the end I think it was worth all the waiting and time spent on them to have been ready.
The sequence of Guns of Infinity did not begin until now, but this one that was sequence of Sabers of Infinity took two years to be released if I am not mistaken.
There is a lot of potential in your premise, and despite the mistakes pointed out in the demo, I still think that i have enjoyed so much of the demo as a sample, there are errors ?, yes, but that is what serves a demo. I like your writing and I say that, good authors are not born, they achieve this level, and i think you will become one of these, you write because you like and it is the begin of every writer.
I would offer my help in programming or writing, but I believe that I would be more of a hindrance than it would be, because English is not my native language and also because I have not programmed anything in a long time :pensive:
but I leave here the thanks for caring about your readers and also wish you good luck in everything that comes ahead. :smiley: :+1:

4 Likes

EPIC FORESHADOWINGGGG

3 Likes