The Operative: Fires of Revolution (Scifi WIP) (Updated 6/28/2018)

gender-choice
science-fiction

#212

Which part is that? I’ll see if I can fix it?


#213


#214

When I press set us down it freezes


#216

Alright, so its fixed now, however i will release the fix alongside the update which should be in an hour or so! :smiley:
Sorry about that. :frowning:


#217

Should be fixed now.

For everyone else, first half of the update is out! The next one should be out by friday, then the final update for the flashback scene as a whole will be the following friday. I expect there to be issues you guys point out so the next couple days those will be my focus! :smiley:


#218

Hey, I tried this out for the first time! The premise definitely seemed interesting, and I think you have some potential here. There are a ton of small-scale spelling/grammar issues throughout the text, which make it sometimes difficult to follow. I’d recommend asking someone to proofread for you – if I tried to point everything out it would be really rather a lot and not a simple thing to do with just screencaps.

There’s a bug where I chose my own name and hair color (blonde), and the game renamed my character “blonde” instead of setting that as my hair color.

I think there might have been a continuity error when the governor showed me the photo. I said nothing, and I got a response saying that he “ignored” me and suggested I think about an offer he’d made, but I don’t recall an offer being made in the first place.

My game also seems to have frozen at the same spot @ThatsOk pointed out, so I don’t think the bug is fixed.


#219

Yeah, I need some proofreaders. How would you suggest getting some? Just ask on this post or the forums? As for the freezing i honestly dont know whats wrong, trying to figure it out. Edit: Might be fixed now. My playtests of it have worked.
Also that hair color thing? I messed up the code so it sets your name but its fixed now haha!


#220

Game freezes when I get to the Governors door and chose the option “kill them all”, there was also an error when I chose the first option “step aside or die” startup line 1193: increasing indent not allowed, expected 0 was 1.


#221

Found the indent issue and that should be fixed now, however the freezing issue i honestly am confused about. Ill mess around and try to fix it. Thank you.
@Kaiser Fixed it! YAY! :smiley:


#222

@spytim
I love the new title, certainly giving readers/players idea of what is this will be about :smile: (I notice in game it still just “The Operatives”, I assume it’s because you not add it yet in startup.)

These are what I found with some suggestion anyway (and I think I'm become too nit-picky... Again)

TheOperatives_UEDarchives_Rose_Noteableactions

TheOperatives_UEDarchives_Rose_Noteableactions2

I believe make “At” become “at” is correct one :thinking: or is after “year 196” and “year 199” supposed to have dot/fullstop/period?


TheOperatives_UEDarchives_Rose_Noteableactions3

Unless “Newly” is name, “Newly” should be “newly.”


TheOperatives

you”


TheOperatives2

I think “curiousity” should be “curiosity”. Correct me if I wrong though :thinking:

The capitalization here is inconsistent, my suggestion either make it

Love, Revenge, Greed, Lust, for Power, or just Curiosity.

or

love, revenge, greed, lust, for power, or just curiosity.


TheOperatives3

The wording feel off here. Say I choose “Im here to seek revenge”, it’s odd if it “You are here to im seek revenge”.

:thinking: my suggestion is erase “Im”, “I am”, and “I am here”(except “I am not quite sure what I want to do yet”). Or change “Im” and “I am” to “you”. This is just suggestion of course, you may can re-phrase it more better than me! (since I have little to no experience with writing :sweat_smile:) .


TheOperatives4

business


TheOperatives5

  • First one should be “Shut up”
  • Second one should be “…before I lose my…”

TheOperatives6

I think fullstop/dot/period should be comma since the one that speak still her :thinking:


Duel energy pistols


I try to report again later if it not reported by others yet :slightly_smiling_face:


#223

Awesome, I’ll start working on your list when I get home from work today. Thank you very much! :wink:
Any suggestions story or choice wise or are you just seeing where it is going? If you feel a choice should be there and it’s not let me know! :smiley:
Again, thank you very much for the time you took the find these errors. :slight_smile:


#224

When i get to the part that you said is mostly done but wip engage the rogue operatives while they’re busy with the soldiers it just freezes and won’t transition after selecting that option.


#226

Should be fixed hopefully, still no clue what actually causes it but i messed with it and it work now so. Fingers crossed.


#227

So I have changed the stats and the stat screen a bit, I would like your opinions on them both. I will explain the screen in more detail at a later date. Note this update does not take the place of the Friday update.

@SabrinadizaLS Fixed those grammar issues. :smiley:


#228

Well, just some wording(which I listed below, I’m afraid it’s can a bit too… specific, sorry :sweat_smile:), I also found many things, but it’s may a bit mixed up since this combination of my previous female play-through and recent male play-through. So I’m sorry in advance if there some that confusing!

Summary

TheOperatives_e

All “i” should be “I


TheOperatives8

…were assigned together. You all spent…

Just need space.


TheOperatives9

  • Diplomacy the only reply he…”

:thinking: Small suggestion, it would be nice if there comma though, like this:

Diplomacy, the only reply…

  • "…stop you as you step through the…

TheOperatives_c

Ive only seen…

Just missing one apostrophe.


TheOperatives10

"Other than that nothing, the…


  • I found the “He ignored you” is odd. Because it’s feels like my mc say something, when he/she just stay silent
  • Since the one that speak after this is still he, I think dot/fullstop/period should be comma.

TheOperatives_f

  1. “…large suitcase. Turning to you…”

Need space, and capitalization.
2. Just some suggestion for this part to have possible suitable wording and comma, like this:

…secure line to be Admiral", putting the…

  1. …or camera’s. You doubted there…

Again, just need space.


There inconsistent use of quotation mark, either add quotations mark here:

Or erase the quotations mark:
TheOperatives12b


TheOperatives13

At here, my mc is female.


TheOperatives14

Turning slowly you can’t help but…


TheOperatives15

…together"

Just missing one quotation mark.


TheOperatives16

I assume when *set the eyes color, it’s "Grey", so you may want to change it(and other colors as well) into "grey". If you want to capital it, let say in startup.txt it’s *create eyescolor "", to capital the first letter make it have exclamation mark like this; $!{eyescolor}.


TheOperatives17

Since it is after dot/fullstop/period, it’s should be “One”.

(I think there something about this line that I want to comment or bring up about :thinking: but I forgot what is it :sweat_smile:).


Unnecessary dot/fullstop/period.


…their heads respectfully, the others…


Okay this is really long :sweat_smile: sorry if I’m being too specific!


Certainly neat :thinking: but there is opposite stats that a bit odd
TheOperatives_stats

I found it weird the opposite of “Honor” is “Cunning”, because I think it is actually possible to be both cunning and honorable (correct me if I wrong though), I just don’t think “Cunning” is suitable opposite of “Honor”.

This is of course just my personal opinion, and not to mention I didn’t see how the stats determine things yet (or I miss it).


#229

Holy smokes that a lot!

Thank you very much for pointing those things out! I just finished going through it and fixing them. :smiley:
The stats themselves have not really come into play yet, this is the molding phase for our MC.
As for the Honor vs Cunning I am not too sure about what to change honor to, but you are correct in believing that it does not fit very well. Again, thank you very much for the specificity, without it I would miss so much stuff… 0_o

If I may inquire, what do you think about the characters so far? (Yes im aware we have not gotten to actually talk to them very much if at all since our characters are in a warzone but that is soon to come. As in either Friday or the update after that. :wink: :smiley: )


#230

Blatant vs Cunning, Honor vs Subterfuge. My suggestions for replacements.


#231

@Jinx_the_Atomic_Cat I might use those… :smiling_imp:

@SabrinadizaLS the update tonight (est time) Makes the stats start effecting outcomes of the battles.
More info to come!


#232

I’m waiting until things get interesting before I get testing again


#233

The update will drop at 11 pm est time tonight, it will add a few things to the scenes but nothing that is worth a playthrough honestly, the big one should come the following friday, however if things go smoothly i may drop the next update sooner… :wink:

@Classified Understood, the update that will most likely make things really interesting is the one next Friday the 1st of December.