The Judgement of Tarkar [WIP Updated 1/4/2019: Poll #51]

gender-choice
high-fantasy

#21

So I’m not sure if it’s a good or bad thing I haven’t gotten any feedback since the last update, :worried: but a big thanks to those who liked the previous one! :hugs:

And now, for this update:

Average Playthrough: ~19,000
Total Word Count: ~140,000

Fixed typos/grammar/spelling/continuity up to month one, week 4. I finally fixed the typo that @niisan saw, so thanks again!

Fixed an issue where Harja wasn’t giving any money for the week. I like to think they were stuffing the money under their mattress, the cheapskate, but now they will actually give you the money on day seven.

Added another “heading home” scene for week 4. Let’s just say that particular farmer is now banned from bringing his wagon into the city.

Added a few scenes for week 5, including meeting the potentate and the judge. And at last, we have met all the major characters!

If you have any thoughts on them, or anything else, please do tell! I really do appreciate all your feedback! :hugs:


#22

Played the demo. Was a lot of fun and was very original take on this kind of mythological stories! I also like how the city is like a Republic and not just another Kingdom. Is the Potentiate and the Judge like co-equals with their own spheres of power? Also, will there be ROs? I think earlier you mentioned is is possible to romance our roommate/God.


#23

Thank you!

Yes, although the city is part of a kingdom and subject of a king, Tarkar itself has divisions of power. The potentate is actually elected by the people, but because he has the most clout in the city and is considered to be the official leader, he gets the title of potentate. The judge is normally chosen by the previous judge before their death, and she usually has a mix of legislative and judicial power with less obvious recognition by the people. I say usually because there is often a power struggle between potentates and judges, and who really has the most political power, and what sort of sphere that falls into, can vary.

Something to keep in mind if you try for an ending where you become the next judge or potentate. :woman_judge:

Yes, there will definitely be ROs! Your divine roommate Harja, the potentate Manahen, and the judge Terentia are confirmed romances. I would like to have at least seven, so I was thinking of putting up a poll soon I can see who everyone would like to have as an RO.


#24

Seven sounds like an ambitious number. I can only speak for myself but I actually prefer less but more developed ROs.

Either way I look forward to reading =)


#25

Thanks for your response! Always like endings where you can end up running the show :stuck_out_tongue: Also interesting about romancing the members of government, I am not entirely sure how I feel about either of them as we only have really had one scene with them! Anyways, excited to explore the functioning of the city!


#26

Just finished my first playthrough of the new demo. What a ride! So many possibilities, I had trouble deciding what to do next. Lots of replay potential, which is great!

This

Knowledge: Your head’s full of important information and useless facts.

cracked me up, thanks :smiley:

Something I noticed was that A) my character knows quite a lot of people, B) I keep mixing up who is who, sorry!

Harja was enjoyable as always~ Not sure if they share this sentiment, though.

's not really grammar, but close?

Ah, one thing - the phrase “the people” appears often and in some cases, like

“You have heard our words, Aelia of Tarkar, now let us hear yours. Why is it that the people must wield a farmer’s sickle in one hand and a soldier’s bow in the other?” asks the Goddess of Art,

maybe just “people” would work better?

image
last line: “can make me weep in …”

I’ll be back later with more :sunglasses:


#27

I figure I’d aim high, especially because certain endings will lock out certain romances – Terentia, for instance, will completely reject you if you take her position as judge from her. Likewise with Harja, who will reject you in certain endings if you’re still alive.

There are a couple of endings where you’ll find yourself in a leader position… some more honorable than others. :wink:

Thanks! I’m glad you think there’s enough possibilities and you found some of it funny. I feel if was completely serious it would become too depressing and make the reader apathetic.

Yeah, there’s a lot of characters. I tried to divide them two at a time each week so the reader doesn’t get bombarded by all of them at once, but I know their introductions aren’t much. Do you think it’d be helpful if I put a list of characters and their descriptions in the stats page?

The gods (at least in this instance) are using a more formal and legalistic language, as well as using “people” to less mean a direct “you people” and more an indirect “the individuals that make up the group of mortals” if that makes sense. Although I’ll definitely check again, because I would agree with you otherwise! (And I’ll change the can make me weep line, too.)


#28

Do you think it’s possible to add a save system? Three times already I had to exit the website page while playing on a phone and lost my progress. I still haven’t reached the end :sweat_smile:


#29

I’ll have to look up how to add the save system, but I’ll try! I also put a checkpoint system in so you can go back to any previous month, although that’ll appear in the next update.


#30

Definitely! It’d make for an interesting read too.

Save system is also a great idea, especially with a game as complex as yours :slight_smile:

How many gods will we encounter in the story?


#31

All right, I think I figured out the saving system and the checkpoint system, so there should be an update tonight! :relaxed:

The other gods may be mentioned – like the Goddess of Love, whose festival is held during the sixth month – but otherwise the only gods encountered are Orihark, Sarpet, Ilatsal, and Harja. If too many cooks spoil the broth, then too many gods spoil the city! :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


#32

Thanks to everyone who has commented or liked! :hugs: Here’s the next update:

Average Playthrough: ~21,000
Total Word Count: ~156,000

Fixed typos/grammar/spelling/continuity up to month one, week 5. Thanks again to @niisan for pointing out the wording issue! Also, I completely goofed and had too many days for month one – it was supposed to be 31 days, but I had 35! That’s fixed now, and because of that the amount of rent you have to pay is lower, too.

Added save system. I hope it works!

Added checkpoint system. I have it set up so that, if you’re on month seven for example, you’d be able to go back to any of the previous six months. You won’t be able to jump back ahead, though.

Added a scene for month two, week 1. Raine’s back and he’s here for the rent! I hope you were counting how much that fancy outfit cost…

Changed choice method when first meeting characters. Before if you selected a district it would randomly choose one of the characters within that district, so if you chose the Slums you might get Agatha or Aquila first. Now the choice list is a bit longer but you can decide who you want to meet first.

I also added a character list to the stats screen. I’m thinking of turning it into a choice option, and breaking it up so there will be a list of minor characters too, but for now I hope it’s helpful.

If you have any thoughts on the new update or anything else in the game, please let me know! I appreciate all your feedback! :hugs:


#33

This is just something minor but I would like for my mc to thank Harja for the outfit at Plotina’s, so can there be an option to thank him?

Typos




^^I think the previous two were on the same page


#34

That’s a great idea, and something I’ll definitely put in!

I just noticed the typos – thanks for pointing them out. :relaxed:


#35

Thanks to everyone who has commented or liked! :hugs: Here’s the update for today:

Fixed typos/grammar/spelling/continuity up to month two, week 1. Fixed the typos @Morphine saw!

Added birthday customization. This will have a couple of effects, including a scene at the beginning of the week your birthday falls on, but for now it just alters your traits a bit.

Added options to thank (or not thank) Harja. Thanks @Morphine for the suggestion! :relaxed:

Added scenes for month two, week 2. Harja’s curious about the Housing Council, but of course they want you to do all the leg work for them.

Added six more jobs to be unlocked. Become a thief, or a hunter, or a sorcerer! I’m thinking I’ll have it so you can unlock them by raising your stats and/or visiting certain places multiple times.

Added ability to travel to Chestnut Forest. The sorceress is an elusive figure…

Added first minor event. If you go to the Chestnut Forest at the end of month two, week 2 you should be able to see it.

Added shopping district and five new clothes to buy. Depending on what you wear, the characters may start to react differently.

And once again, if you have any thoughts on the new update, or anything else in the game, please let me know! :hugs:


#36
Typo

Kind of afraid it was a spoiler.


#37

Thanks for pointing out that typo! That’s one of those that Word doesn’t catch and I tend to glance over.

So I was considering if I should put hair and eye color customization into the prologue. The thing is, nearly every choice so far has had an impact on stats (except for your name, which instead has an impact on what choice Harja’s mortal name/gender can be). I’d probably just have eye color effect etiquette and let the hair customization be descriptive, but I’d like to hear everyone’s thoughts on the matter.

  • Only add eye color (with stats)
  • Only add eye color (no stats)
  • Only add hair color
  • Add both eye color (with stats) and hair color
  • Add both eye color (no stats) and hair color
  • Other (please specify in comments)

0 voters


#38

If those are going to be mentioned somehow in the book like

  • Some character comments on them
  • Or description during a particular moment
  • Or something else

then i would like to see. But if its just for the sake of having the option then i dont really care that much, it would be cool, i love char creation, just wont impact immersion that much.

Anyway.I forgot the rest so thats it.

:fox_face:

Also @expectedoperator what do you mean when you say eye color affects etiquett?


#39

Yes, if I do add hair and eye color, there will be character comments and descriptions. One minor one I can think of right now would be when you shop in Plotina’s store, she’d compare the outfits to your eyes/hair.

As for eye color affecting the etiquette stat:

Originally I was thinking if you choose say brown or green eye color, you’re etiquette would go up to 15%, but if you choose blue or hazel it’d go down to 5%. It’s not that big of an amount, so even if you want to go for an ending requiring etiquette but still want blue eyes, you can make it up easily and don’t have to choose – but if you want an easier time in getting that ending or have etiquette choices open in the beginning, you can choose those eye colors that’ll make it easier.

Another option that I’m liking the idea of, especially since the poll is so close, would be to have choices like “a noble look in your blue eyes” which increase etiquette, and then the next choice be “a natural look in your blue eyes” which would decrease etiquette – and all the other colors would be like that. That way you still have the choice of eye color, but you’re also actively deciding your etiquette as well. Perhaps that’s the best way to have it. :thinking:


#40

Second option is cool

What about

Blue eyes increases charisma, since some think blue eyed people prettier?

Green eyes smarter just cuz

Brown eyes enhances stealth or somestats like this cuz people pay less atention to brown eyes. Unlike blue and green

:blush:

:fox_face:

Lemme take a look …

Blue charm

Brown knowledge

Green etiquette

Something vitality

?

I was going to say green for wonder. But i dont think its going to much use early on. You know cuz green eyes are rare and all.