The Golden Rose (WIP) - Updated 6th of April, 2020

Real ones know Billy has a lot of character and appreciate him.

20 Likes

OH MY GOSH I LOVE THIS😍 Definitely looking forward to next update

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The MC is not a rich noble or a knight. Why would they need an expensive destrier or warhorse? Makes no sense to me.

Billy was available and you can buy the lovable steed at a low price. Besides, it’s a narrative choice - we can’t always get what we want can we? :woman_shrugging:

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Geez, that issue was days ago and already addressed by the author, time to move on guys.

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A bit off-topic, but happy birthday :cake: :cake: :cake:

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tenor (2)

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I’ve read the demo many times already and am finally leaving a comment haha!

I’m not that good with writing long, insightful reviews but let me just say that I really, really love this story. The plot has this underlying mystery to it that keeps me on my toes, the characters (even the background characters!) are charming and full life. Alessa is my bestie. And Hadrian…baby you are my angel!!! And Billy is best boi.

Super excited to read more in the future!

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No matter how many times I encounter her. I really love Beka. She’s really well written and I love her characteristics and attitude. I really like to see more of her. :+1:t3:

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Writing has been going well, I’ve finished the fourth time event and are about half-way through filling out the Harbor. But I do have a question for you.

Initially, I was going to update with the rest of Chapter 4 and the third Interlude. That means the Harbor and the Gates paths, the Ministry Building, and the Interlude. Each of these sections is the length of a chapter, so the next update would pretty much be 3 new chapters to play.

I already have their first drafts done, meaning I have already written the “linear” version on paper. But even so, because of their size, I reckon it will still take me over a month to finish writing them to completion.

So, I wonder if I should update with the Harbor path once I’m done? The early feedback would be valuable, and then the wait wouldn’t be as long. Plus, because there are so many diverging paths, the inevitable continuity errors would be much easier for you guys to detect and for me to fix.

It would still be a substantial update - the fourth time event alone is almost 18k words and so far I’ve written 70k for the Harbor. But it wouldn’t be as dramatic as if I update the whole of Chapter 4.

I’m torn on this, so I’d like to know your thoughts.

  • Update after the Harbor is done.
  • Wait until Chapter 4 is completely finished.

0 voters

Thank you in advantage for everyone who votes. Keep safe! :rose:

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Not sure if someone has already asked this, but was the name the White Company inspired by the Black Company in some way? Or is it just a coincidence lol

I’m late to the vote, but here are my thoughts…

If you update as originally planned, your feedback might be more organic, since there will be the natural flow of the game. If you are most concerned about pace, flow and the other elements of story-structure, this is the way I’d think you want to go.

Finding the continuity errors would be a great benefit for the Harbor release, but would you be giving up the benefit of what I pointed out above? I would be afraid of doing so, since most forum readers seem to not want to replay content a lot. They like to do a single pass then save and wait until the next update comes out.

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Finally played through the whole demo and man is it awesome! I had a lot of fun, some choices actually made me laugh. The characters are absolutely lovely (even Billy, I fucking love him) and your writing style sucked me in quite well.
Please keep up the good work!

Not sure if mentioned before

My MC is clean shaven but in the first screenshot he has a beard. The sentence is also repeated.

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It was actually inspired by The Golden Company, from George Martin’s books! :smile: I’m not familiar with the Black Company, but a quick google search tells me it’s a fantasy series? Seems quite fitting.

Ahh that is exactly my conundrum! :tired_face: I do want more organic feedback, and the original plan definitely came to a more dynamic end. But at the same time…

You’ve given me food for thought, Eiwynn. Thank you for your input.

@Ninja1 Thank you for catching those! Hopefully, they will be fixed in the next update.

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Someone on tumblr suggested having just a few people test out the Harbor path to give feedback on it, then releasing the rest to the public later on like you initially wanted. Seems like a good compromise to me, have your cake and eat it too. :cake:

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The thought of showing the update to just a small group of people is terrifying :grimacing:

I think, for now, I’ll just keep working on the update and see how I feel once the Habor is done. It’s going along very smoothly, despite my inability to control myself and not add more branches to scenes that were supposed to be linear. :weary:

38 Likes

I enjoy your story including the parts where heresy technically I’m not religious guy but I like to know what the object is not to burn it so I might be killed if this was my life back then killed by the traps by my ancestors or killed by the crazy church and inquisitions but to me it’s all fun reading this story made it more fun to read I hope you keep going😇

1 Like

This is most certainly tied for my favorite wip right now. I love the interactions with every single character we meet and awkward phrases/grammatical errors aside the story is well written and well structured thus far. Really love the setting and world building you’ve put together. Really can’t tell you how enjoyable this demo was and I can’t wait for more :grin::grin::+1:t3:

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How come the MC did not bring any real armour with them kind of weird since you are mercenary’s.

i think the simplest answer might be: “plate armor is heavy and also Expensive” :sweat_smile:

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Full plate armour is not really that heavy plus it is worth every penny when you are nearly unkillable.