The Aegis Project (spy/thriller) updated 9th January

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#21

I agree with @shettiejw it is an amazing demo. Detective stories are awesome. Hopefully we get the chance to actually finish this new case :wink:

But as for agent 100, his struggle with aging and getting old definitely makes him more unique in my eyes but it also completely kills any interested in him as a RO imho. I’m not a fan of big age gaps in relationships and to me… hes just too old. Kinda curious how you are planning to write that particular subplot.

As for Angel tho, I adored him! Always a fan of an unapologetic villain.


#22

Fair enough, I know that’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. It is a significant age gap (if anyone’s wondering, 180 doesn’t have a solid canon age, but the narrative will mostly assume they’re 30-something) and that is going to come up - it’s one of the reasons he might be hesitant about the romance.


#23

Looks like the backgrounds are pretty evenly spread, from the poll, that’s good! (Though thief is the most popular career - it’s the suaveness, right? :wink: )


#24

@Anathema You make a good point. I think it’s a really unique take on a character to have him deal with the universal challenge of ‘getting old’, but at the same time, I feel like the age gap is just too much. If he was in his mid 40s, I think he’d still be struggling with the idea of getting older and not being as physically capable as he was at his peak. The age gap would still be significant, but more manageable, I think. Ultimately, I will respect @Scribblesome’s choice as the author, of course, just my two cents :slight_smile:


#25

I might knock a few years off and make him early-mid 50s, but I feel like I want to keep him in his 50s … if you have a 40-something upset about being too old it seems more like he’s just being overdramatic!


#26

Ok, I’ve added Chapter Three to the demo now! Now you get the introduction to Hanson Industries and the other characters/LIs. Let me know what you think, if you find any errors, etc. :slight_smile:

Also I enabled the save system, which I did forget about before.


#27

Inadvisable is my middle name :wink:


#28

Well ok, but it’s your funeral…possibly literally… :wink:


#29

Like the new update. This is probably my favourite WiP at the moment. The cultural touches are wonderful, especially with the Markov/a choice. I hope you’re ok with me making a few comments, don’t mean to come across as nit-picky or anything, just things that seemed a bit jarring or incomplete.

During the casino scene at the beginning, the MC has the choice to charm Frau Bergmann into letting them upstairs. They talk a bit, Bergmann uses rather colloquial language at the end, and MC follows her upstairs. And then she disappears. I found that a bit disjointed since with the way things were going and the inclusive tone of “come on” I’d expect her to at least make some parting comment once there.

Would MC get a chance to tell the Director about the do svidaniya comment? It sounded like a threat, and would probably be rather vital and useful information, but MC doesn’t seem to think much of it afterwards.

typos

“Did I tell you about Petrovich’s crocodiles?” Angel says, pervesely upbeat.

The signal for both is routed through your phone, camoflagued by the mobile signal.

through the fanfare and self-aggrandisment


#30

No, please, nitpick away, it’s all helpful.

Like this - good catch, I did have some lines in the old version explaining where she went, I think they got lost in the revamp. So I’ll fix that up.

And I might give a line or two of the Director explaining what’s happened/going to happen to Petrovich (protective custody, essentially. I’d worry more for the crocodile goons - DIABLO don’t take failure well)


#31

I really want to put an LI poll up but I guess you haven’t seen enough of them yet. (And I have the feeling Angel would be in the lead, with all the sexy evil :wink: )

Still, any thoughts on the introduction of the characters so far? Do they make a vivid enough impression?


#32

So I replayed this again and now picked the dead fiance option and god that was genuinely sad! It was just a short text but you wrote it beautifully and I could feel my MC’s happiness. So my question is will we be able to play a MC stil in love with their dead fiance? Cause that’s kinda how I want to play honestly. A ruthless vengeful agent hell-bent on bringing down DIABLO.

Like will they be mentioned again or in flashbacks? Or maybe we could tell the other characters about them.

I just wanna keep holding poor Nick in my MC’s broken heart :cry:


#33

I’m so glad you said that! I actually rewrote that part already - originally it was more ‘you had a fiancee, now they’re dead’ which I thought wouldn’t have much impact on the reader, so the story of how you met is purely for the added FEELS :smile:

Definitely yes to both! There’ll be flashbacks coming up, and if you start a new romance it will be mentioned then too, or you’ll be able to say that MC is still too hung up on Nick/Nina to love anyone else.


#34

And I’m so glad you said that! Some games (and books, movies, etc) use the dead spouse/friend/family as a cheap motivation method and never talk about it again. I’m really happy you’re planning to treat it differently - I mean it’s a traumatic event, it’s bound to have long-lasting effects on people.

Oh yeah, the way my MC is she won’t be able to love anyone else for a very loooong time. Certainly not before she brings hellfire upon DIABLO - and Angel.

Can I just say how delightful it is to play as a ruthless character? I usually prefer to make suave, manipulating characters but intimidating people in this game is too good a time to pass! I feel like a badass :grin:

And last thing (cause I know I’m rambling) - Hercules Hanson is awesome. His name is great, his appearance is great and his temper is great too. Loved his introduction.


#35

Oh yeah, all the trauma backgrounds are going to come up, both in how they affect the MC and in some plot stuff. It’s most obvious with the hand background at the moment but they’ll be important for everyone.


#36

Speaking of the hand, if it’s not too spoilery, how much impact would it have on gameplay? I can imagine that it might raise some suspicion, because an “advanced prosthetic” doesn’t sound like something your average person would have. Also, would the MC be disadvantaged if they chose to take lock picks or knockout toxin? Say they hurt their right hand, or are fighting someone so their right hand is engaged - would the prosthetic hand have the necessary dexterity to use those devices?

They mostly appear to have distinct idiolects and personalities. Especially 100 - the seeming incongruity between his playfulness and the gravity of his presence made him the most vivid character to me. Valdez, on the other hand, wasn’t really, though that’s probably due to the limited exposure or her clipped speech.


#37

The game is supposed to be set slightly in the future (about 202-something) to account for the more advanced tech, so it’s not impossible for an average person to have a fancy prosthetic, though it would come with quite the price tag.

It has the necessary dexterity, it might be more of a problem that the MC can’t feel what they’re doing. But gameplay-wise, I don’t want to give the player a significant disadvantage that they wouldn’t have with other backgrounds, because that’s not balanced. So … it’ll only really be an issue if it’s plot-convenient/dramatic for it to be so. The PTSD’s going to come up more, but that’s all plot stuff.


#38

Right, sorry. It never occurred to my temporally-egocentric mind that the story might be set in the future, haha :grin:


#39

Doing some rewriting on chapter 4 so that will be up maybe tomorrow or Tuesday. I’ll update with corrections for the typos etc that people noticed in the currently available chapters then too.


#40

Chapter 4 is up!

I have to admit that this chapter isn’t quite where I want it yet. I’m not sure what else it needs, but it’s something :thinking: let me know what you think.
There is, however, a deceptively huge fight scene. Which I hate writing, but keep writing anyway :sweat: