Team Zero (WIP)

Update News

I finally got a chance to finish the next update for this thing :slight_smile: Please enjoy Damon’s dream sequence and a couple random minor fixes.

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/86817576/web/mygame/index.html

John looks you straight in the eye. “You understood what needed to be done. That’s rare. And you even had the guts to do it yourself.”

Except I didn’t do it. I let him do it.

@Dolphinzgirl
I just saw your post and shouted for joy which scared the crap out of my husband. It’s all your fault! :stuck_out_tongue:

Anyone else feel the need to bring up the fact that Damien’s worst nightmare is apparently his normal life?

@Dolphinzgirl Love the Poe reference !

Alex is my favourite character, he seems so sweet :slight_smile: And Damon is so, idk I just find him so mysterious and hot. I enjoyed the update, keep up the good work.

I got so excited when I saw the link that I nearly choked on my tea!! Anyway, I really loved it!! I feel like the people the Commander spoke to shows what he’s afraid of. People misunderstanding him or stereotyping him (like the reporter and the business person who said Damon’s not a listening type), people feeling let down because of him, etc. Or maybe that’s another one of his smokescreens. I wonder what Sarah is afraid of.

+1 can’t wait to see more.

Kat is the type of character that I’ll be trying the entire game to not see break, I can already tell, at least in the flashbacks. And then find out 10 years later it was all for nothin’ even if I succeeded. @-@

I hope Sarah’s is next!

Thanks for the update, it was really interesting. I wasn’t expecting this kind of nightmare and I am still wondering what all this means because as @stsword says, “apparently his normal life” is the key. Everything is in the “apparently”. So more guessing for the reader, but it feels right with the way Damon is pictured.
And @Princess’ comment makes me ask: does Damon have friends?

Love the update! I like that Damon’s fear is kind of ambiguous, it really works well for him since he tends to be kind of mysterious and closed off.

I suspect Damon’s fear is monotony, since the dream reflects his everyday life and he didn’t seem particularly interested in any of the people he had to meet with and none of it challenges him. For a man with his intelligence I imagine being literally bored to death would be genuinely frightening.

@Princess’ interpretation is good too. For all of his confidence, it seems like Damon knows exactly what people really think of him.

@BAPACop Thanks for finding that, I’ll check it out and try to fix it.

@piggleywinks Glad I could make your day :slight_smile:

@iceman262 Yeah, that line just seemed perfectly appropriate. Plus it doubles as a reference to Poe and one of my favorite movies.

@VampirePrincess I’m glad you like them. Nothing’s worse than not liking any of your potential LIs :stuck_out_tongue:

@Brian While you can’t stop Kat from ending up a bit broken, you can certainly determine the magnitude of the break.

@Crigley13 The plan is to do either Sarah or Kat next, depending on where inspiration strikes.

@Tehani While there are people who would consider Damon a friend, there is no one that Damon considers a friend.

@stsword, @Princess, and @Eriedanna Those are all awesome theories! Damon’s fear was meant to come off as ambiguous, mostly because Damon is obfuscating like hell to stop the PC from figuring it out. Although if the PC’s relationship with Damon is high enough, I’m thinking they’ll be able to get the truth out of him eventually.

Why do I feel that if you let the MC read a newspaper or something that they would see a headline that reads “Black Matter Declares Bankruptcy” or even worse, “Kanye West Proves He Has Larger Ego Than Damon Black”

just want to make sure i’m safe, i can still romance damon if i push the subject of his dream right?
it was a big drop in approval so i want to make sure

@Dolphinzgirl The update did not disappoint! ***Damon, you will be mine!!*** :slight_smile:

Just a couple little things I noticied:
~ Damon nods. “On that we agree. I don’t know what bothers me more, the idea of him invading the privacy of my mind or the idea that he wastes such a useful power on such trivial tasks.”
“What an utterly you answer.” (*Something is missing here in the MC’s reply.)

Damon, is that really you?
“In the flesh.” (*MC reply is missing here.)
A playful light comes into his dark eyes. “Be careful Commander, keep saying things like that and I’ll start to think you missed me.”

Great update! Good job!
A few things,

1: After I select my name and last name I have to pick again when I get picked up by the driver at the airport.

2: Why aren’t Alt and number keyboard keys not working for the choice selection?

3: attacks in Yemen, Alexandria, and Mogadishu,"
I think it would be better if you listed all of them as cities rather than 1 as a country and the other 2 as cities. You can use Sana’a in place of Yemen.

4: I pointed this out some time back but still not corrected.
General Fields repeats slowly, as if to test it out. “A good choice, Commander.” With that, he turns and *dissappears down the hallway.
Remove one S

5: The man adjusts his glasses. “Well, it was nice talking with you, but we really must get back to work,” he says, turning back to his *compansions.

6: Damon shrugs. “I never thought he’d be so literal,” he says, sounding almost *dissapointed.

I don’t know, I think Damon’s fear may have to do with not knowing. Alex disappeared once he’d worked through the fear, right? He identified it and then the PC had the choice to comfort him and then he faded away. The PC is left chilling by herself with nothing left to bother her once she identifies that she’s in a dream, then she figures out how to manipulate the space around her and she works on helping out her team. Damon appears to have gotten to the point where he realized that he was in a dream, but he was unable to puzzle out how to actually leave. It took the PC to show him what to do and only then did he fade.

Then again, perhaps he already dealt with identifying/dealing with the fear before the PC showed up. Although I don’t know why he’d still be in the dream if so.

@Pieces - maybe he was just waiting for the MC

my journey through the mountains is finished and the legendary Girl of Dolphinz has released more stuff for this story.What a wonderful day it is!

@Dolphinzgirl YESYESYES

I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

M’DARLINGBBYDAMON

I’m gonna point out some errors first (both in Damon’s and Kat’s flashbacks) because… phew. Damon’s dream sequence was pretty roller-coaster-y for my poor little Blackened heart #lamepunsession

  • In John’s recruitment mission, when Alex and I are in the elevator after we left his office.

[“We already know John isn’t at his apartment. Why would he lie to his boss?” Alex asks, clearly intrigued by the mystery.

"“It probably has something to do with his nighttime activities,” you reply, leaning against the back of the elevator.]

One too many quotation mark before the “It.”

  • Still in John’s recruitment mission, when Alex and I are in the restaurant to pass the time while waiting for Sam to gather information regarding John.

[After you place your orders, you take the opportunity to steer your conversation with Alex.

(Choice1) “When where you in New York before?”]

“Where” should be “were”.

  • In Owen’s recruitment mission, when he, John and I are on the way to the airfield after picking Owen up from the jail.

[“So where are we going?” Owen asks casually, lounging in the backseat of the Mercedes.

“A private airfield near Sokol,” you reply. “It’s the fastest way for us to get out of the country.”

“How far away are we?”

“About twenty minutes.”

“Maybe you should drive a little faster,” Owen says helpfully.

“And what has suddenly caused you to start playing back seat driver?”

“Mostly the fact that someone’s been following us for the past five miles.”

“Why didn;t you say something sooner?” John asks.

“I wanted to be sure, Chuckles. Didn’t want to cause alarm over nothing.”

“I see you’re already proving yourself to be an asset,” John says dryly. He turns to you. “How do you want this handled?” he asks.]

John should’ve asked “Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

  • In my own dream sequence, after I managed to convince Capt. Murphy that he’s dead and Rajul shows himself.

[You turn and see Vasquez slowly stand. He smiles at you, and his skin begins to ripple and morph, finally settling in the form of a man with dark hair, olive skin, and the blackest eyes you’ve ever seen.

“Very clever, Commander. Locke warned me not to underestimate you. I see I should have listened more carefully. Your will is remarkably strong.”

With a wave of his hand, the rain forest around you begins to dissolve, replaced by an endless star-specked darkness.

“Now let’s talk, Commander. No doubt you have questions, and I think you deserve a reward. No one has ever managed to break through one of my nightmares before,” he says, giving you an appaising look.]

“Appaising” should be “appraising.”

  • After I ask Rajul “Why are you doing this?”

[Rajul’s eyes gleam. “Following orders with just a dash of sadism. If you’re trapped in your dreams than you’re not causing Locke problems, and if you’re trapped in a nightmare,” he pauses to give you a smile that would be altogether more appropraite on a shark than a man, “then I get to enjoy it.”]

Rajul should’ve said “If you’re trapped in your dreams then you’re not causing Locke problems,”