Shinsengumi Historical Game - Very WIP

I’m, with no doubt, one of those persons, I rather enjoy that particular kind of games/books.

@Johnny101,
Seems a good project. i will be checking this game’s progress. Good luck and Congrats on the excellent idea.

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Okie-dokie my fine wolfish friends. I’ve updated the first post with a (really) short demo for your enjoyment. I very much look forward to hearing your feedback. clenches in dread

@ruhenri Good to know, here’s hoping the finished product will live up to expectations.

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Cant wait to see more :grin:

I like the first fighting style choice

I enjoyed the intro. The only place I felt a little loss at was when deciding to go to the exercises or the group surrounding something - I knew neither word and had to guess what I was looking at.

I look forward to more.

I’m quite a fan of Japanese culture so seeing more of this kind of themes makes me so happy.

I’m not much farther into the story yet since I only saw this when I’m getting ready for work. XD So anyway, I appreciated it that we could choose to be a woman or man. This is going to be interesting since I know that being a swordswoman is quite uncommon during those times. C:

I’m looking forward to how this is going to developed. :grinning:

I forget sometimes that not everyone is such a massive nerdy Japanophile as I, at the time of writing I didn’t want to stilt the section with two quite long explanations, but looking at it again both do rather need at least some qualifier for those not up on their east Asian culture.

Well, I have something to do in the morning it seems.

Actually while we’re on the subject would people prefer this kind of thing be explained in the narrative or do we reckon it’d be better as a glossary in the stat screen?

If it isn’t done often, a word following in parenthesis with the English translation would be enough… Ceasar(Emperor) or Imperator(Emperor) one or two times. It is not usually needed more than that within the text and a glossary term would allow a quick look-up if needed.

Right, I’ve stuck in a couple of other choices which explain those two terms, I’ll be implementing a glossary of terms in the next major update. Cheers for calling me up on that @Eiwynn

@Terrell_Williams Haha, yeah I figured that would end up being the most popular, for obvious reasons. I might add in one or two more if I can come up with something decent, or I might add further customizations down the line. One thing I’m gonna do pretty soon is allow for customization of your sword and the ability to give it a name.

@resuri08 Well there’s not a great deal to it now and aside from a bit of flavour text it doesn’t really come up, since those in attendance couldn’t really care either way so long as you’re handy, I believe I’ve said already that a few of the Shinsengumi you’ll meet going forward will get shirty about the prospect of fighting alongside a woman.

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Just finished the demo. I’m fangirling at the moment because my MC was able to meet the Hijikata! C: I got a soft spot for him. Anyway… I’m looking forward to your progress. C:

The haircut, smithy and the guard encounter at the start were great. It felt personal, humorous and gave exposition in a natural way. To make it more personal, I recommend taking the opportunities for dialogue and active exchanges:

As he works he tells you more about the influx of Ronin coming to this quiet suburb, noble samurai and wild men alike, more besides as well.

I’m as guilty as the next writer on telling and not showing, but for reader immersion it’s crucial to feel like you’re in the MC’s sandals. You should hear what he/she hears, you should feel what he/she feels, and so on. Low-level senses are very important.

The amount of Japanese is intimidating, and it will overwhelm the majority of your readers. I know this is a historical piece, but for example: using ‘shaku’ instead of metric or imperial systems is probably not a worthwhile complication. You need to find a balance between historical accuracy and coherency.

For coherency I’ve found that reading my sentences aloud helps more than anything else. You’ll find that many of your sentences can be broken into several:

He raises the massive sword above his head, adopting a ready stance you know well, jodan-no-kamae is pretty much the standard high posture in kenjutsu despite the recent popularity of Jigen-ryu and its modified hasso stance.

Overall the story is off to a good start, and I am looking forward to how it develops.

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@resuri08 It’s not a party without the demon Vice-Commander, glad you approve.

In the writing of it I think the idea was to speed on to actually getting inside the compound, but reading it again you’re absolutely right that those scenes would benefit from having a bit more meat on the bone as it were.

Mm, I think I was trying to sprinkle it here and there just for colour but I may have gone a touch hog wild. Amusingly a shaku isn’t that much over a foot anyway. As for the stuff about coherency, I must admit I am guilty as sin. At this point I wonder whether I’m the Al Capone of run on sentences.

Thanks for the input guys, I’m sure I’ll keep on saying so but having just come in to this I can’t emphasise how much it means that people would make the effort to help make this project better.

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History nerds gotta stick together … its unwritten code :rose:

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Shinsengumi? Definitely an interesting concept. Have you heard of Hakuoki? It’s a Visual Novel (a very good one) that deals with the same subject matter but with a bit of a magical twist.

That said, how accurate and/or realistic are you planning this to be?

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I’ve actually seen some of the anime based on Hakouki, but never played the visual novels myself.

As for my game it’s going to be a lot more realistic and about as accurate as I can manage without getting in the way of the story. For example in the demo Takeda Kanryuusai is already a member of the Miburo when really he shouldn’t be there for another year or so, but I wanted to introduce him here cause he’s important.

In short, I’ll bend history while trying to stay close to it. Admittedly some elements will be exaggerated. Swordsmen the like of Saito and Kawakami will be incredibly strong, but not supernaturally so.

I loved the plot and the short demo so far. I’m highly interested now because I love stories about samurais, plus I love the Japanese culture too. :smile:
I’m looking forward for more of this wip. :3

So like, Yamazaki will just be a really good doctor, like, not a ninja like he is in 38939922 adaptations because everyone thought he was cool and also spied?

Wow, I just picked Shinta as my name and got told that it was too gentle for a swordsman ;). (wait, I’m fighting with the shinsegumi?)
Anyway, I really enjoyed the Wip, and the Japanese words just add to the feel of the game. It may be a good idea to add a glossary so that it’s easier to understand.
Keep up the good work!!

@Nexus Always glad to have pleased someone besides myself, not sure that there’ll be an update any time soon (RL is being RL and slowing me up) but I’ll certainly try.

@Bagelthief Not a ninja but certainly a spy, Yamazaki’s espionage is a(n admittedly debatable) matter of historical record, same as Saito’s numerous assassinations. I’m not sure at this point what treatment I’ll give him, but he’ll certainly be more than a simple doctor.

@Joey_Lai Many of the MC names are puns or references of some kind or another. Fujita Gorou for example was the name which Saito used after the Bakumatsu, the implication of course being that he got it from the MC. Kuwabatake is the name used by Toshiro Mifune’s ronin in Kurosawa Akira’s movie Yojimbo while Juugo is a numerical pun on the characters age. (Juu - Ten, Go - Five put em together whaddya got? :grin:) In the film Sanjuro jokes that he’s actually closer to forty since his name can be written as “thirty years old.”

Shinta is indeed a reference to Rurouni Kenshin, as is its female variant Hotaru (Firefly) which references Kenshin’s departure from Tokyo in season 2.

See, told you all I was a nerd.

Also if you know anything about the Shinsengumi there’s nothing to say that you’ll stay with them, but that’s for later. Much, much later. :wolf:

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I mean it’s like, was he? Was he? No one will tell me and there’s no like, sources in English.

And all Japanese media likes to paint the Shinsengumi as tragic flawless martyrs of an age gone by, so you can never be sure what they’re making out to be cooler than it historically was (or more tragic than it historically was, cough cough hint hint).

That said, about emotional embellishment: have you decided on ROs, if you’re having them? Is it up in the air? Is it waving around like it just doesn’t care?

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Ah… ROs … If there were one, Hijikata has always been my favorite. XD