the Sims mentality…generation later, someone is still asking ‘‘Who did they kiss again? oh wait…no, that was their great-great-grand Mother’’ …
wiggle eyebrows now that’s a legacy 
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Hence why I said that they are gender/sexuality player choice as with Weyhaven or Love at Elevation. You only need then to create three or four characters whose gender and preferences are up to the player. I realise that they might lose some things that way, but it’s definitely preferable to giving any player only one choice if that game only provides that.
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I have been thinking about this concept after a playthrough of Asteroid and, tbh, I have still not come to conclusions of what exactly I look for in ROs or friendships with characters in the CoG label. I am aware of their mission and am all for giving the playerbase to play how they want. However, I wasn’t satisfied at all with how any of the relationships played out.
For starters, I play to my orientation (straight male) and then I play to my worldview where I am friendly and show respect to everyone I come across regardless of creed, orientation, race, etc.
So, I start up the game with interest in potential ROs. My only options seemed to be the navigator, whose written personality was unappealing to me. Then along comes the other option who seemed like my pick at first because the mystery made her interesting, but then it just didn’t work out. At this point, I was willing to just be a little spacefaring family and be friends with my crew.
However, despite the game supposedly “knowing” my orientation, I still had two male characters come on to me. Which really muddied the waters of the “friends” narrative I had constructed for myself. See, IRL, beyond the fact that I am married, my mutual respect with my friends lets them know where I stand and that I am not interested. So, I never had a problem from unwanted advances. Here the situation was more or less forced on you, and your choice was how to deal with a kiss or confession after the fact. In short, those incidents killed the story for me and I have not been interested in future playthroughs.
I guess what I am trying to figure out for my own projects and in future game consumption is where the line is for being inclusive to all, but still respecting how the individual wants to play.
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That sounds problematic. I am certain no one of any gender or sexuality would want anything forced upon them that they weren’t interested in. I recall something similar years ago with a WIP where a male character who is a friend ends on top of my character and seems to suspect something should happen, which felt very awkwardly handled. That said I have played Moreytown where that sort of thing happened but because the choices about preferences were well done it wasn’t so much of an issue.
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FayI
111
It’s a real shame the game made you feel uncomfortable, that certainly wasn’t my intention! I was careful to make sure that after both male characters suggested a romantic relationship, after a no they withdraw gracefully and don’t mention it again. It’s also worth noting that unless I’ve forgotten something (wouldn’t be the first time!
) you never actually set your sexuality in terms of interest in various genders - only in terms of ace/aro/demisexuality. Totally willing to admit that I might have put something in a long time ago and forgotten though.
One of the reasons I did it was to help paint the characters as people, not just NPCs - they have drives and interests separate to what you as the MC ask of them. So we have some characters having romantic interest, others making mistakes, or having split loyalties. None of which makes you feeling uncomfortable invalid in any way, but I hope it explains some of my thought process!
Thinking about it, I have been super influenced by Dragon Age II - and with that game, there was a flurry of discussion about Anders coming onto male PC then. It might be a YMMV thing.
More generally on the topic, it’s so fascinating seeing how differently people approach it both as writers, and as readers. I much prefer reading games where the romances aren’t restricted by the gender choices of the MC, but I do get the idea that having NPC orientation identities is fun representation. A tough one!
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@FayI No in your game you don’t set your orientation reason i don’t found that scene weird.
However I have noticed many Straight people get really really angry when a fictional character from other orientation flirting or asking politely something. I am straight I don’t get it. You are not interested You simply say it and that’s it I don’t think that spoiling anything.
My problem with Dragon age 2 is not that is how a character Merrill that i HATE that i never used and i insulted calling her demon and monster for use blood magic. In a scene TRIED TO KISS ME WITHOUT LOGIC SAYING HOW GOOD FRIEND I AM…
SERIOUSLY BIOWARE… The delivery of that game romance has no damn sense Characters just charge at you ROMANCE MEEEEEE
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Laguz
113
And you can turn her down. In order for Merrill to try to kiss you, you have to have picked at least one flirt/romantic option around her. You dug your own grave there, Mara.
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I didn’t it was a launch bug. That caused most people complains the triggering in romance was broken and characters just jumped at you.
Don’t make me wrong I tried to fling Everyone else in game including all brothel people everyone except Merrill
Speaking as a straight male I think it’s likely the same thing as what can happen when a straight guy is unexpectedly flirted with by another guy - it’s effectively suggesting to us that we are gay, and we can take that the wrong way or find it a bit offensive. I think most people have learned to be polite about explaining no these days anyway. But I suspect there’s some elements of that when it happens in a game. As long as there’s a polite but firm negatory it’s okay.
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Laguz
116
Then… isn’t that your problem, not anyone else’s?
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I don’t see how if it’s someone else making an assumption, though I suppose if there’s some kind of mistaken outside context it’s less of an issue. Like I said most people these days tend to let it slide.
Laguz
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I mean, people who get angry or offended at the assumption that they’re gay are… homophobic. Because they associate being gay or being mistaken for gay as being seen as something derogatory, that’s why they get offended.
That it’s an insult if another man politely asks you out, or something, because you’re so obviously not gay, even though… anyone can be gay. They don’t have to wear flaming rainbow boas to be gay.
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Probably yes, but that’s not exactly going to stop some people from being annoyed, even if it’s just internally. People are still human beings after all. But we definitely have a better understanding of that situation now than we might have in say the 80’s or 90’s.
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Eiwynn
120
This is a gentle reminder to please keep conversations directed at the topic at hand and not at the individuals themselves. Focusing replies on the individuals themselves instead of the topic at hand can lead to friction between members and often causes the thread to derail.
Please also remember that it is often not so much what ones opinion is that causes friction, but how one chooses to express that opinion. Using negatively-charged value words are a good way to start friction, as is generalization and sniping. Personal comments lead to friction and flaming.
Sniping back and forth will often lead to the system closing the thread down, let’s avoid this if we can.
Finally, if you see disrespectful posts please do not reply to them. Rather, please use the report feature and let forum staff deescalate friction.
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I have been kissed by a girl and I just explaining her sorry I am not lesbian and telling the poor embarrassed girl that she had nothing to be sorry. I was in a lgtbq party in college so she just assumed. Why should be angry?
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Laguz
122
This is true. At least I can trust you, metal Derek. You get things. You get me.
@Eiwynn I don’t understand, there’s no animosity here. Me and Metal Derek are agreeing on the same thing here. I like him, I consider him a friend and ally?
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Eiwynn
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The warning is for those that might not understand that …
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Yes we all are saying same of different ways and perspectives. But @Eiwynn is trying to not let this becoming a battle royal drama. Even if we are all kinda saying same.
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Awwww thanks! 
I don’t personally know anyone NB but talking to you about stuff has been very understanding.
I would definitely hope that such subjects can be discussed and handled rationally, respectfully and kindly on all sides, I have always felt fine about things here.
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Laguz
126
Oh. I see.
There’s nothing wrong with being disappointed in people who can’t see that being considered attractive by another man, regardless of sexuality, is not something to be disappointed in. I have been hit on by both binary genders, which is somewhat flattering but not entirely my cup of tea.
If you need anything info-wise more specific, feel free to PM me. I may be slow or terse as certain heavy questions emotionally can take a mental toll, but I’ll try to respond when I can.
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