Seven days in purgatory (2020 Sept 5th, Chapters 3/7) (ko-fi open: Jan 6)

So lol you’re like the main lead’s best friend?!?
And you’d probably be killed by (your partner) the one you (love) has a crush on according what you said
:joy_cat::smile_cat::smirk_cat:

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Gosh I’m falling for this one :yellow_heart:
I love your writing, it’s incredibly immersive
Literally can not wait for the next update
While the spouse is certainly not right in the head and potentially dangerous, I still want a happy ending for them :sob:

I don’t think the spouse is lying about their past. Omitting some truths maybe, certainly concerning the accident. They do know each other intimately. Their professions are as he says they are.
The spouse wants to…ease the mc into their true lifestyle perhaps?
Whatever it is, I think they were both in on it. Two misfits with an " both of us against the world" kind of mentality

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“can I trust (insert spouse)”

“I don’t know, I did”

aw crap is that the bird speaking? ohhhh no…
Auuuugghhh I hope for a good ending but I don’t know if that makes me a fool or not ahah

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Found a small pronoun error for a female MC

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omfg yea :sob::broken_heart::joy:

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I just devoured the whole demo within a day and I’m HOOKED! Really really love your writing style, it’s honestly such a joy to read it.

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okk so I’ve been thinking…

theory that's probably going to age terribly (SPOILERS)

the guy/gal the MC’s with is not entirely right in the head but I feel like they really do care about the well being of the MC… I also feel like they’re not really lying about the MC’s past , just purposely omitting crucial truths (but I do have some doubts about the whole “car accident” thing, the MC most definitely almost drowned but idk… I feel like something isn’t right about that and I see this as the only thing the spouse might ctually be blatantly lying about… I’ll get to that in a sec).

There’s a recurring theme of cannibalism and violence that seems to come from the spouse…

BUT here’s the thing: what if the real “problem” wasn’t the spouse, but the MC themselves? Think about it: anomie, nightmares, feeling of not fitting in and “weird desserts”… it does feel like the we’re hiding, but what if the spouse isn’t hiding the MC because they are doing something wrong, but because the MC THEMSELVES did something wrong?
What if the MC is unknowingly being protected by the spouse from the authorities?

What if, in the past, just before going in a coma, the MC did something terrible (COUGH shovel COUGH) that forced them both to leave in a hurry, crashing in the commotion and not even having enough time to go get the cat?

.

things that made me think this might be the case:

-why not go get Hannibal? (sure the MC was probably DYING right then but I mean, THE CAT.)

-the MC doesn’t feel normal in the sense that they feel like they don’t fit in, and this reaaaaally triggers them, they might throw hands.
“Not enough blood”, -the nightmare about the people posing weird

-gore in the nightmares. sure they were a nurse but still such violence is uncommon even in that line of work, and with what I referenced in the point above you might see where I’m coming from:
what if the MC themselves was the one causing such violence?

-“Funny, I was sure I was damned to Hell…”. Like, that could just be a bitter joke, but also an admission of some sort of guilt…

-If the SPOUSE was the one who did something wrong, unless they’re more insane than I thought (which could definitely be but whatevs lol) they wouldn’t really encourage the MC to get their memories back, on the countrary, they should fear the MC remembering something terrible about them, which doesn’t really seem to be the case tbh…

-and finally, our spouse feels greedy. Now hear me out on this one. this point could be interpreted as something that confirms that the spouse is guilty of something and not the MC, BUT things might not be as they seem…
In fact, keeping someone from getting arrested and maybe even getting the help they need after they’ve done something very wrong just because you don’t want to let them go is, technically, a form of greed.
If our MC is disturbed in a way that makes them potentially dangerous in certain situations, keeping them from getting the help they need enables them to hurt others and most importantly (for the spouse), themselves.
Sure an arrest might mean they wouldn’t be able to see each others for a long time, heck, maybe even forever, but if the MC actually was a danger, turning them in would still be the right thing to do even with their best interest in mind, and the spouse would know that and feel guilty cause they’re not doing so.

wanting to protect them and care for them might actually be doing them more harm than good, hence THE FRIGGING BIRD PARALLEL (poor birdie :,(

.

Things that make me think this might NOT be the case:

-if something terrible happened, the shoveling at the start is probably referring to that and not just coming from the spouse gardening. BUT IF THE MC was the one who did it, why aren’t THEY the ones digging?

-The spouse might be innocent but they’re still very sus I mean who the hell drinks blood?? But then again the MC also used to do that so wth what do I know lol

aaannd this is my theory, thank you

OOF I’VE WRITTEN SO MUCH JEEZ BYE

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Oooh gosh I really love this. The philosophical musings and poetic wording are an absolute delight to read. There’s undoubtedly a creeping wrongness to the whole thing and the spouse is obviously strange, but man am I endeared to the sweetness and domesticity. Leave the existential dread to me; my MC can remain blissfully naive :v:

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Hello! I just played the demo and I HAD to come here and comment on it because I was just so utterly blown away by the smooth writing and unsettling atmosphere! It grabbed me right away and there were so many moments where, despite knowing that this entire situation is shady AF and probably nothing can be taken at face value, I was falling in love with how charming and kind A was…only for certain pieces of dialogue to SMACK me in the face like a brick. Those moments were so genuinely shocking I found myself physically recoiling on at least two separate occasions, which just goes to show how immersive and gripping it was lol. This story is amazing and I am now so invested in this creepy but loving mystery! Your writing was smooth, the pacing was good, the mystery and hints were dealt out in the right amounts to keep it very interesting, and the atmosphere, as I’ve mentioned before, is outstanding. I’ve never read another Choice of game quite like it.

Got lots of theories but I’ll hold my tongue for now. Also at this point A can probably do anything to me and I’d just be like, okay honey, anything for you.

Thank you for sharing this with us! I look forward to updates, and am extremely excited to see what will come next!

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So the MC is similar to the nurse from Ratched and the spouse to Quinn from YOU. Interesting :thinking:

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Gaaah, this game is weird…
I’m hurting myself a little bit by playing it, considering I’m very upset with amnesia in fiction… It’s literally the only thing that upsets me about this story, can you believe that? :rofl:

Two details that bothered me:

Chapter titles:

If playing with black background, reading the chapter titles is impossible. I’d suggest to reverse the colors if black background is activated, or make a thicker white outline around the titles.

Siren questions:

Also, how come that, when you can ask the siren ONE question, you can’t ask about the CAT?! Come one, that’s the truly important thing! IS THE CAT OKAY?!

With that being said… I have another thing that bothers me, but that’s more of a preference thing. I don’t like playing characters older than 35 years old, unless they’re not human and have a lifespan that would be longer than a human’s.
Because of that, in my headcanon this is set in a world with a species that lives longer than humans, and that makes it all right.

But then, I started thinking about that headcanon of mine more seriously, not only as a convenient trick used to negate the age of the characters… And the reenactment of the vows really pushed me in that direction even more… :thinking:

Because of that, I started thinking - what if A was some sort of inhuman creature with some kind of powers? Well, maybe half human (or half normal inhabitant of that world if following my age trick), considering the story about the bird and the mother who thought they are a demon etc. Most likely a kind of predator in any case. In that scenario, I can easily imagine the MC as a different kind of creature, one without specific powers, or maybe just some dream/mind related ones, with what we see of them and the ways they use to recall things… In any case, because of how “abnormal” the MC is, or well, is seen as, they unexpectedly became closer. The MC being probably the only being able to understand and love A, which in turn made them the only person A could love.

Anyway, something would have happened, an actual car crash, sure, but maybe caused by “normal people” pursuing the duo after discovering what they are. A witch hunt, if you wish. And the MC died in the crash. A, thanks to their powers, finally managed to bring them back to life. But the ritual, or maybe the time spent dead or something, made the MC forget about their past.

And also, I’d assume the vows were another of A’s weird rituals, maybe some sort of binding between the two. For example to make it so the MC wouldn’t age anymore, or at least not faster than A, if their lifespans are different. And because of the resurrection, they had to repeat the ritual now, hence how nervous they were about the MC maybe not accepting. And well, the vows being a strange ritual also explains why the MC did feel so weird during and after it.

But on the other hand, they may consider revealing the truth about whatever magic and supernatural is in action to the MC right now, with how unstable they are, wouldn’t be a good idea. Not to mention, checking step by step how open-minded they are to things like that is not a bad idea, before deciding wether or not to proceed with the big reveal - or when.

I just hope it was truly A’s blood, not Hannibal’s… :scream_cat: - but I will assume it was A’s, since it would hold more power, surely. And probably be required for the binding, anyway.

And that’s my crazy theory which I consider to be absolutely perfect, really. Not to mention, any other theories I could have would be so mundane and things I’ve already seen in movies. This is something I’ve never seen before!

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Great story! I haven’t really seen a CoG/HG game with this kind of premise before. I loved it. It was well written, and when A says “I always get you back.”
Right there I knew something was up. Your ability to make it feel like there’s more than what’s on the surface is really good and you don’t overdo it aswell which is great. Also, the relationship with MC and A is sweet and doesn’t feel forced even with the MC’s amnesia and all the crazy shit. It just feels right and like it was always there. I liked when they (in my case, cuddled) fell asleep together like a normal couple and the next day A makes blood chocolate.Then, its all sweet and normal when they re-enact their vows. This is easily in my honourable mentions for WIPs and would probably be in my top 20s when its fully released.

I just hope the conclusion is rewarding in like a “What a twist! I can’t believe i didn’t think of that! All the clues were hinting at that! I’m so dumb.” type of way.

I just think that if the ending was that the MC and A were cannibals/serial killers and the reason for MC’s amnesia was because they crashed in a police chase. It would be obvious and in my opinion a tiny bit anti-climactic. Nevertheless, I loved it and will definitely be watching for updates.

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It’s missing-Sel-Lee hours for me right now :pleading_face::pleading_face: time to replay the demo!! :blush::ok_hand:

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Very interesting setup! I adored the reference to Tom Lehrer, love that guy, squealed like a little kid when I saw his name pop up. ^^

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I. Am. Terrified.

Don’t know why, because A was so sweet and I was so accepting about it all so there was no friction whatsoever but in my gut, there was such a pain when reading the vows scene, like, it was telling me to run, but at the same time, I didn’t want to poke the bear, like the siren referred him as.

Also, you can’t do this to me! You can’t present me chocolate, but then add blood to it, like, you’ve hated me enough with chocolate, now I can’t say no. T^T

But anyways, that aside, this is reaaaally good, like wow the ambience of it all was great, especially the eerie undertones of it all. Not gonna lie, if A or MC turn out to be a serial killer, I think my MC wouldn’t be bothered? Don’t know why, maybe it’s the fact when MC woke up form his coma, he handled that knife like a seasoned pro, flipping it in the air and catching it like it was nothing, yet he can’t walk because he’s weak. Makes you question where he got all that skill to handle a knife like that.

Oh, one more thing, when mentioning the fact that the MC was diagnosed with not feeling like he belongs, aka abnormal, I really liked the touch about his childhood, when you play a queer character, that your dad sees you as bad or unnatural because you want to play with dolls and makeup, or wear a dress and that just ties so well with the whole not feeling normal, or not having a “guide” programmed into you like everyone else, it really made me feel the vibes.

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This is legit the best WIP i have ever read.

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I love this wip and all the subtle creepyness and red flags in it lol. I especially love that depending on the choices made( I assume at least, I simply could not resist choosing all the wierd/creepy/ kinda foreboding choices I could because not only am I weak human being when it comes to being able to make scary or weird mcs but I also just love choices like that) the mc can also give off a few warning signs themselves lmao! This is the perfect game when it comes to building tension! Very well done

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The author really did a very good job, I could honestly see this going in so many different and scary directions! It’s given me several theories ranging from cannibals to yandere behavior to straight up serial killers(I would love to go in detail on how buuuuut I’m wary of spoiling for anyone in case I’m right or they haven’t played yet and I have no clue how to physically censor it on mobile), I can’t tell which way it’ll go and that’s especially great for story telling cause it makes you cling to the edge of your seat to see what’s next! I can’t wait for the next update, bravo

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I feel like I’ve stumbled upon a very precious gem.

This WIP is so well-made and hit the readers in all the right places in such a wrong way. Just enough to be off-putting, yet mesmerizingly making me unable to look away before I finish it.

So I did.

And I played it again.

And again.

I am looking forward for more <3

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getting strong hannibal and will vibes from this, i love it

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