I’d always follow Misao… for research purposes…
2 Likes
Misao:
13 Likes
Oh no
6 Likes
Personally, if I found a magic pearl and a kitsune working for/with a god/s, I would go along with it based purely off of my scientific curiosity. Yes, it sounds weird that I would experience scientific curiosity towards theism. But they would be so interesting and would give a whole new perspective to my mortal understanding that I would join, with a whole lot of questions asked.
1 Like
I see what you mean!
Curiosity is a very valid reason to go.
It’s funny that you mention scientific curiosity in particular because in an earlier draft of this game that was waaaaay different, I had the college student background be able to pick their major and have some choices be unlocked because of that. For example an anthropology major would maybe know more about different religions.
4 Likes
I hope that one of the reasons to go has something along those lines. Just to learn about the way the world works or something?
2 Likes
I was just wondering If I poke one of Misao’s tail, Would they shoot a ball of flame at me?
1 Like
Yeah I can definitely include something like that!
They’d be slightly annoyed but would try their hardest to not show it 
2 Likes
Seems like the majority of you guys want me to go with option one!
I’ll probably have the vote open for one more day just in case.
1 Like
Uploading: Screenshot_20181206-231634.png… when I try to pick this last question i got this saying it wasn’t selectable option.
And I really love the story! 
1 Like
I’m glad you’re enjoying the story so far!
I would love to make fixes however the picture isn’t showing 
I’m sorry about that it when I ask “what causes the rifts and why are they bad” after I asked all the other questions.
1 Like
Ahhhh I’m sorry I’m still not sure what you mean. I went back in the code and tried to see if Randomtest or Quicktest could catch it but they both worked fine.
Do you think you could try sending another screenshot?
No worries! That helped immensely! It should be fixed now lol
Poll is now closed!
Thank you everyone who voted!
1 Like
The update was great, and I’m excited to read more. The chapter headers are also very pretty—nice job on those!
A couple coding notes
Misao changes pronouns throughout the chapter, going from male or female pronouns to they pronouns. I’m unsure whether this is intentional. A couple examples:
#While they're fairly attractive,
instead of #While ${m_he}'s fairly attractive
shock evident in their tone of voice
Instead of shock evident in ${m_his} tone of voice.
I also saw that you have some sections of code that you’ve copy and pasted a few times, like in this section
*if (height = 3)
As a fox, Misao towers above you. Being as short as you are, you reach only up to their shoulders. The six flowing tails that fan off behind them make you feel even smaller than you already are.
*if (height = 2)
As a fox, Misao is about the same height as you standing. You can comfortably keep eye contact with them, but though they are only slightly larger than you, you feel dwarfed by the six flowing tails that fan off behind them.
*if (height = 1)
On all fours, Misao is only slightly shorter than you. But if they were to stand on their hind legs that would change almost instantly. Their six flowing tails that fan off behind them leave you feeling small, something that isn't familiar to you being as tall as you are.
You can cleanup your code a bit by adding subroutines and gosubs whenever you have repetitive text like this. The ChoiceScript Wiki has an explanation about gosubs here.
2 Likes
Thank you for the kind words! :')
Again, thank you for the recommendations! I’m definitely going to try to implement those techniques going forward. It looks like it’ll save me a lot of heartache when hunting down spelling and grammar mistakes.
The they pronouns are on purpose for the most part. I’ve been sticking to using they/them for Misao when they are in their kitsune form and she/him for when they are presenting as a human, but I can see I missed a couple of cases where there should be a variable instead. I’ll fix it real quick!
Also I really appreciate how in-depth your reviews are!
You’re like my choicescript mentor 
That’s actually the end of the demo! It keeps processing like that because it’s looking for the next chapter which I haven’t uploaded yet! If it bugs people that much I can sneak in a *finish real quick to the file on dashingdon.
Thanks for letting me know!
4 Likes
Got some thumbnail sketches from the artist I commissioned for cover art. It might be a little early to be worrying about something like cover art but I wanted to get it done now to motivate me to keep going.
I decided ultimately on the first one 
The artist is @wrathes on twitter! Go comission her >:o
7 Likes