Have you by chance considered adding a save system? It helps a whole lot when testing, especially as the demo grows in length.
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Um, no, I didn’t even know that was possible. That sounds like something I should definitely do though! Right, off to the “Choicescript help” forum with me!!!
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OK, I just added a save system. And it seems to work! That was easier than I was expecting …
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Played it again. The stats part looks more clear and balanced now, and the save system works perfectly fine.
By the way, I also caught a few typos.
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Dammit! Thanks, should be fixed.
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hey quick question are you by any chance a fan of Louis L’Amour by any chance the name of the ship is the same as a favorite story of his in a similar setting
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No, that’s new to me, although I just Googled “Louis L’Amour Semiramis” and the parallels are pretty strong. Just a coincidence, I guess! I chose the name because I’m an ancient history nerd (go figure), and Semiramis was the name of a semi-legendary Assyrian warrior-queen who the Greeks (wrongly) believed had built Babylon. I just thought her name would sound cool as a ship name - simple as that!
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Makes sense to me- A cool name is a cool name I’d still recommend the series if your interested it’s a solid read and it might give you some ideas for the future there’s a second one with a character named Turk Maden that would also be worth checking out
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This was an absolutely fantastic read! I’m immensely enjoying it so far. Your writing style matches this wonderfully. Every turn had me exclaiming aloud, be it in humour or despair. I grew up watching Indian Jones, and it’s wonderful to find something that captures that adventurous energy but still gives the option to address the “actually, we don’t own these relics” matter. The characters are an absolute blast. I’ve already got a soft spot for Sam. That moment inside the Bull’s Horns where they call me a smartass for doing my job? Pricless. Esme and Abdul have a really great energy too and I can’t wait to see more of the two of them.
Also, the option to be an archeologist who does parkour is something I never knew I needed this much. It was an amazing mental image.
I do have a quick question about Sam though. There were a handful of times they were referred to as “he” in the story. Was that intentional? In case not, here are the times I noticed it.
Anyways, this is a really great start. I wish you all the best as you continue!
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This story is genuinely amazing. I cannot express how fun it is to be a super flippant and sneaky, but ultimately good, archaeologist. And having three things that I was really good at meant that I always felt like I had variety of choice. I really felt that my decisions impacted the story. And the WORLDBUILDING? Oh my gosh. It was amazing. Seriously seriously impressive work, you are a great writer.
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Thanks so much for your comments, I’m really pleased you like the work so far! And no, those pronoun slips really aren’t deliberate (sorry, Sam). I’ll fix them when I get home from work, thanks for pointing them out.
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Thanks, that’s high praise! I’m so pleased you had fun with it! 
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I love the game so far, but there’s something bugging me. I find it hard to believe the breast plate would be safe in Amman considering there isn’t any Jewish community left in Jordan at that time, even less a synagogue.
The only Jewish community In Transjordan was settled in 1930 at Tel-Or for the construction of an hydroelectric power plant, and depopulated in 1948. Since I’m really not a historian, my sources are Wikipedia, so I might be wrong.
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Hi, thanks for reading, glad you like it!
My understanding of the situation is that Tel-Or was the only predominantly Jewish settlement in Transjordan at this time, but there would have been Jewish communities in larger urban centers like Amman, as a minority population. A lot of Jewish people moved from neighbouring areas into Palestine during the period of the British Mandate, as one of the goals of the Mandate was to lay the foundations for a Jewish homeland, but I don’t think it was the case that every single Jewish person moved there from the neighbouring region, so I’m imagining there would have been a Jewish presence in Amman around this time!
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You’re explication is coherent. I should add that it’s fiction, so I shouldn’t be so picky. Kudos and keep writing a good story 
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Thanks, will try! And having readers who will pick up on details like that is definitely a good thing! (But I’ve always felt that, with historical fiction, it’s more important that it feels authentic than that it is authentic!)
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Happy holidays to all my lovely readers, testers and commentators! Just a couple of quick points:
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I made a number of fixes last week, including to the cube puzzle thing, but I just realized I forgot to announce them because I’m an idiot, so consider this the announcement.
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Chapter 2 progress is going well. There’s a good chance it’ll be up by the New Year, as a late Christmas present!
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MAJOR UPDATE, 28/12/2019
Chapter 2 has just gone up! We’re at 90,000 words now, roughly a third of the way there.
Here’s a little info on the new chapter:
Chapter 2: Shambala
Inner Tibet, 1934. Our intrepid hero has been summoned to a mysterious meeting at a remote military airbase in the high Himalayas. A Nazi expedition party is scouring the mountains for a fabled artifact from Tibetan folklore, and Dr. Spillane must get to it first at all costs. But soon they find themselves snowbound in a high mountain pass during an unremitting blizzard, with a dying friend, hostile guides and an increasingly unstable new ally, facing the worst that humanity and nature can throw at them. Do you have what it takes to find the Stone of Shambala, to keep your friends and allies alive, to negotiate the perils of a rapidly fracturing alliance and to get to safety before the merciless mountain can devour you whole?
This is one for those of you who like your ROs tormented, unstable and deeply problematic. (I see you!)
Hope you like it. As before, any feedback appreciated.
(p.s. the forum doesn’t seem to be allowing me to edit my initial post to indicate that the WIP has been updated. Any insights into how I might do that?)
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I’m very excited to see an update already?! I haven’t even had time to sit down and give feedback. (Short story: I LOVE IT.)
Edit: I updated the title. Holler at me if that doesn’t work for you.
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Thanks so much for changing the title, that’s very helpful. And yes, this was a super-fast update, because I already had much of Chapter 2 written by the time I posted Chapter 1. There’ll definitely be a longer wait for Chapter 3, which I haven’t even started yet!
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