Nothing left (to burn) [WiP] — Updated June 7

Nothing left (to burn)

Alternatively named “Say my name/Who I used to be,” although, truth to be told the title is something I’m still pondering.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: sensitive themes such as suicide mentions, discrimination (mentions of bullying), violence and strong language. All the awful things you can expect from High Schoolers, but nothing too graphic. I would say the story is suited for audiences that are at least 15+.

In Nothing left (to burn) you take the role of a teenager in their junior year who learns of the death of someone important to them. The media dismisses it as a suicide, but you know better; the only way Drew Moore would have jumped from the school roof is if they had been pushed into their deaths.

Having dropped out from River Grove High School at the end of your second year because of the harassment suffered, you finally decide to come back as a senior to uncover the truth of Drew’s death, this time as someone who has remade themselves and is no longer anyone’s plaything.

You have a faint idea of who’s responsible; the same people who made you leave River Grove. You could blame most of the student body and the teachers for covering their eyes when the abuse happened, but out of all of them, there are 7 names that deserve retribution.

The game: Nothing Left (to burn) <---- It’s better if you scrub your cache!

ROs

Olivia “Livvy” Haywood: senior. As the class representative, she only has the best of intentions. Livvy was meant to act as a mediator between teachers and students to make their communication easier, yet most of the time she takes the brunt of both sides.

Rami Moussa: senior. You remember him from your sophomore year, but back then he was a grade ahead of you. You’ve gathered that he was held back a year after getting expelled for violently assaulting two members of the football team.

Chadi Khan: sophomore. Chadi identifies as bigender and prefers feminine pronouns. You don’t know much about her, but she seems to be terrifying good with words and too smart for her age, having managed to gain a position in the debating club.

Kiyo Miura: junior. You think you’ve heard about her before leaving River Grove; an emerging track and field star. Yet for some unknown reason, she has stopped running indefinitely, and seems to be mingling with the wrong crowd.

William Tate: senior. He has transfered this year. Although he seems friendly enough, he’s reticent and quiet, preferring to be left to his own devices. There are rumours of him being a goth who thinks of himself as a vampire, due to his pale complexion and never seen eating.

Alexis Payne: senior. Identifies as non binary, but refuses to tag themselves further, finding labels too restricting for their liking. A free-spirited soul that believes in the innate goodness of people regardless of how many times they are let down.

Changelog

Update June 2 (2019): Finished Prologue

June 3 (2019): corrected some errors and changed the files to UTF-8, should work in Chrome and Firefox.

June 7 (2019): added 1/4 of Chapter 1 and information about the ROs.

I know I have been absent these past two years, but a lot of stuff happened. I have had a lot of unpleassant issues in real life, both mental and physical health problems, and while I’m not going to elaborate much on that, it has been a ride. I have other projects open, but after some time, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m not ready for them. I didn’t abandon or scratch them; I just need to take my time with them because I started them when I wasn’t in my best headspace.

This story is meant to be a lot of bad things in my life handled in a way that won’t hurt me anymore, so I need to get rid of them first to improve. I hope that in the long term, this can be cathartic for you too :smile:

109 Likes

I really like this so far, can’t wait for more

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Good work :+1: Keep it up.

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First of all welcome back! :tada:
I liked the beginning very much, the whole theme of bullying and their victims touches my nerve hard. Though I hope we will get chance to investigate before render judgment.

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Looking forward to this :blush:

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It’s awesome work and can’t wait for more! I always hated bullying and will be the reason I will go all revenge on them! Glad you’re back and hope your day is great! :heart:

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hope you keep on going on this it good read

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Very interesting indeed.

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I barely read anymore, but I will poke my head in to say that that your WIP has an extremely intriguing title and premise. I look forward to ugly crying when this comes out as a HG.

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Get an error when I go to the link:

Error: prologue line 1: invalid character. (ChoiceScript text should be saved in the UTF-8 encoding.)

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I am sure where the scalare is should be escalate.

So far, it looks pretty good. Interested in seeing more.

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I got say this base on how this story going for how do we get are deserve retribution taking it high or low note get these called getting them in prison or :skull_and_crossbones:

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You cover your mouth, unable to mutter a sound.
Would it better if here be I and my? Since other choices are first person narrative perspective.

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After several attemps, I knew that she would never listen to me, so we didn’t talk about the issue anymore.

Throws up an error for me

prologue line 528: Non-existent variabele ‘dtheiy’

But so far a really awesome WIP with a interesting premise. I’ll keep checking it out :slight_smile:

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Thank you for your kind words of encouragement! I’m happy to see you enjoyed it! :smile:

@Langre yeah, the MC will do some detective work before deciding what to do, and also investigate the truth about Drew’s death. In fact, the MC will spend their remaining junior year and summer before their senior grade doing some field work.

@kekexterror yeah, bullying is an awful thing :confused: This is somewhat of an outlet for me, for all the unresolved things that I’ve had to deal with over the years. It takes some time to heal, but that’s the goal.

@Samuel_H_Young thanks! Although 'till project is finished is going to take a while :upside_down_face:

@Taylor_Enean are you using Firefox? Unicode works with Chrome, but I’ve changed the files to UTF-8 coding, so it should work with Firefox too. Scrub a a little your cache or use an incognito tab and let me know if you can play :slight_smile:

@Dpwjeremy thank you! I’ve corrected it, clean your cache and you’ll see the correction.

@Takashi_Shin the initial idea is to take revenge through whatever means necessary; with some, death or prison aren’t required, but who knows, sometimes things get a bit out of hand.

@Runbunnyrun you’re right! Thank you. Sometimes when you write you kind of forget these things :sweat_smile:

@Yippie I squashed the bug, thanks!

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It works now, thanks. Will try it later when time allows.

I don’t know how it happened, but I realized that I was crying over my friend’s death :cry: Good luck with your game, I liked it and felt it

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Oooh, really interesting concept. I like it. :grin: Probably half of your readership will be transported back to the good old days of being bullied, so also definitely a relatable topic there that isn’t often explored in COG (at least as far as I’ve seen).


Also, I found a few grammatical mistakes for whenever you next edit…

“You’re even surprised they had the decency to keep you[your] friend’s name a secret; nowadays the journalist[journalists] that make it to the top news are hyenas”

“you are chocking[choking]”

“And like with most cases of abuse, it escalates, to the point it’s untenable [.]”
(forgot a period)

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That was… short. :thinking:

I’d like to see more, though, and it reads easily and clearly, so I guess I can say that, at least. :relaxed:

Yay? :grimacing:

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@Mei_Hiroshi thank you! My intention was for the player to connect with the MC’s friend (Drew), since part of the plot (and their motivations) revolves around their friendship :smile: You’ll see more about Drew in the future, too!

@buggygirl11 hey! I’m sorry for being absent for so long, we have a lot to catch up, don’t we? Thanks for the mistakes, I’ve corrected them. And yeah, the reason I’ve wanted to explore the issue of bullying is because not only it’s about personal experiences, but something that is rarely explored in detail, so there’s a lot to deal with and unpack.

@Taylor_Enean thanks! Since English is not my first language, I try my best to be clear, although I’m a messy writer (which means a lot of mistakes and sometimes sentences that don’t make much sense outside my head) :sweat_smile:


I’ve updated the demo with a bit of Chapter 1; remember to clean your caches to avoid playing the old demo :upside_down_face:

9 Likes