My Imaginary friend WIP and playtest

Well … Those damned puppins always give me a mini-heart attack XD

Zombies never scared me and they became really boring lately (the walking dead zombies specifically)

“I am legend” really impressed me with the infected in it (they were more of a threat than normal zeds, mainly because they do not move like drunks and growl like idiots)

The games that managed to scare me (even a little) were nosferatu alien isolation and until dawn (I hate the “standing still parts growling”)

Regarding rabbits are evil. Who remembers the pink bloody rabbit from silent hill? If that doesn’t convince you rabbits are creepy buggers I don’t know what will. It’s why my imaginary is a blue rabbit, I called him Donnie Darko.

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Why! … Why did you mention it
The one that is not to be named, it gave nightmares for weeks (I played alot of horror games as a kid … What is wrong with my parents?!)

I think both our parents wanted us to be scared if life

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Well I’m almost there, tying everything together at the end of this is taking longer than I thought, Checking rechecking and editing and then working in all the little details.

Its coming together well though I’ll have a decent end to the first chapter, well worth the work I think.

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Just double check any gender references :smile:

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Ah yes… my arch nemesis… genders…
Should be okay but then again seems to be a recurring theme. Will check these evil things. :laughing:

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I’m at 30,000 words in this first bit alone! I’m surprised at how this can baloon on a person wow.

anyway still chipping away.

BUT I managed a lil sketch:

It of pollly still working on the dress idea I’m thinking junkyard Victorian dd some ruffles, a dress she’s grown out of years ago, that kinda thing

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Is Polly a character we are yet to meet or did you slip a stealth update in when I wasn’t looking?

No ninja this time I swear. I’m waiting till the end is complete, it’d ruin the moment :innocent:

Polly is someone met in the second chapter.
Inspired slightly by one of my favourite song artists… that happens to be a strong influence on the story ideas I’ve had along this bit of story telling. lol

See imaginary friend root below, very sad song the way she sings it.

My nephew watches Puff the Magic Dragon :smiley:

You should come up with a full colour image for Polly btw :smile:

Facebook keeps giving me images in my feed appropriate for my MC too :slight_smile: :

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xaf1/v/t1.0-9/12345460_998329040208894_5410528658664084798_n.jpg?oh=2a8d2907d4c7fed8c6bbccb5bff2e150&oe=56E758D2

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I will color it when I decided on a finished outfit, still thinking on that one.:wink:
Just gotta juggle activities here and there.

Too much to do, not enough hours to do it in. Know that feeling :smiling_imp:

You and I seem to have the same taste in outfits if your DA gallery is anything to go by so I’m sure you’ll come up with a good one :smiling_imp:

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Your art is always so spot-on. This is my favourite out of the pictures you’ve shared so far. I especially love the 'ginary, Sox.

And I’ve finally had time to play through more than just a few pages of the game. I like the more surreal, casual style of writing you’ve used. I also think it’s brilliant that I can imagine my 'ginary however I please. Perfect.

A few typos:
It was beautiful and white cliffs and pale sand provided it’s namesake.
-That should be ‘its’ without an apostrophe, since the word is possessive, not a contraction of ‘it is’.

Knows 'most of your secrets… but not all
-Delete the inverted comma before most. Also it might be a good idea to end this sentence after ‘all’ and then start a new sentence.

“Go to hell!” You tell him with a wry smile of your own "You know damn well I ‘earned’ this thing
-That first ‘you’ should not be capitalised, and there should be a period after ‘own’.

Allen raises a brow at you. and shrugs inviting you to debate the pros and cons of a night out.
-Extra full-stop after ‘you’.

You’ve known since high school, the way you’re eyes lingered a little too long.
-Should be ‘your’ instead of ‘you’re’ since it’s possessive, instead of a contraction for ‘you are’.

It seemed Allen saw something too. Did {bf_he_gs} get the same feeling?
-Your code is showing.

I did notice a lot of grammar errors and typos, several per page. When you get close to finishing, if it’s possible for you, you might want to think about paying an editor - even if it’s just a basic proof-read rather than copy editing. The style is great and I would hate for typos to detract from it.

Your concept and characters are really fun! I look forward to seeing where you’ll take the story next.

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Ack! grammar my other enemy. My technical skill isn’t my strongest unfortunately.

BUT I will endeavor to hunt down these literary perpetrators one by one until my domain is free of their tyranny!
(Removes Abe lincholn hat)

I’m not sure I could afford the luxury of a paid editor. But I’m intending on making periodic sweeps through the story to check things. To be honest I haven’t read it start to finish beyond writing and correcting known mistakes :wink:

I love keeping myself in suspense. It’ll be like playing it for the first time. I don’t want to get sick of it. Call me crazy… actually… I am… a little. Hense the subject matter.

If you have access to MS Word or Libre Office Writer it may pay to dump your text in to those and use their grammar tools to help out.

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like what i have seen so far.
very interested too see where this is going.

there might still be spelling or grammar things wrong with it but seeing that both those things are not my strong point i`ll leave those for other too go true.

did i miss it or was there a thing that tell you what kind of party your going too? because that might effect my dress choice? or does dress choice somehow effect where your going? i don`t know.

anyway liked it a lot and good luck with the rest of it

I don’t have as much experience with it, but Google Docs is free and supposedly has the same features as word.

As a person that has used Google’s office tools: my advice: Word or Libre Office :smiley: