Monster Hunt WIP

Welcome to Mirrah! A prospering medieval land ripe for any man or woman to make their mark on the world. As long as your a dark elf!

For everyone else, its a land of torment and war. For the last eight years, the dark elves have waged war on the humans, and at this point, victory is all but assured. Our heroes disappeared when we needed them most and now everyone is just waiting for the dark elves to decide which race is next.

This story however doesn’t have you defeating an entire race and saving the day like a baddass hero however. I told you, our lands heroes are gone. You take the role of a human, freshly knighted, (out of necessity), trying to survive in hiding with some of the last of your kind. When a detective comes knocking asking for help, you find yourself in a situation that’ll have you dying to get out of! Get to meet funny people doing horrible things. Or maybe horrible people doing funny thing? Either way, being stuck anywhere near these people is sure to make your life hell.

And after all the dust is settled and you’ve fought, talked, or thought your way through anything or anyone that got in your way, maybe you’ll have the answer to the big question in this story.

“What makes someone a monster?”

Hi everyone! I’ve been a lurker on this site for probably about two or so years now, and have only recently even made an account. Ever since I read Mecha Ace years back I’ve wanted to make my own game, but wanted a very inspired story. Flash to 2018 when I’ve been playing dnd with my buddies for awhile now, and it hits me. “Hey, i already have a setting, characters that we’ve worked on for months at least. all I really need is a good plot.” Well after about a month of thinking I figured out what that plot is.

So I’ve been working on this project for a bit now, and although it may be a bit soon to be posting anything about it, I came to the conclusion that if there’s any problems be it spelling or just general feel of the story, I want to know sooner rather than later.

Here’s the link to the demo: Monster Hunt

A few things to note before you jump in.
Firstly its really short, about 5800 words at the moment. What I really wanted to get out there was the feel that i’m going for and feedback on the writing style. I have a very dogmatic mind so any nitpicking on anything you feel should be looked at please feel free to bring it up. Be mean if you have to if i’m not picking up what your putting down. Don’t worry i’m a big boy I can take it.

Secondly, and probably more importantly, this game has horrible people in it. I want to stress that I don’t share all the views of the characters in this book, as some of them are messed up. Now personally, i’m hard to offend or bug in general, but even I know that this book needs some trigger warnings. Every character in this book has problems, ranging from a horrible mouth to alcoholism to sexual abuse to being an actual murderer. If your easily put off from anything like those, you should probably steer clear.

Alrighty, now that’s all said and done, time for something I think you’ll like. The main cast is rather small and each one of them are romanceable. So without further ado here’s a small description for each of them. Keep in mind, I’m only posting the romanceable characters here, there are others, but besides Clive, you wont see them as often.

Isabel Deckard- An investigator currently working on a series of murders that has taken her to your doorstep. With fair skin, dark brown hair that comes down to her chin, and a slight build, shes not the most intimidating of the cast, but like most of the others, she’s got her secrets that make just as deadly as the rest. “Of course, there’s always a catch.”

Victor Moran- A mad scientist who cant seem to stop putting himself in harms way. His genius intellect is only matched by his insanity and his temper, and with his morals out the window, he is a danger to all he comes across. Generally off putting, what with the dark blue skin, demon esque features, and mechanical parts, he understands the racism you face, but that doesn’t matter. Fear is a tool to be used on the masses. “What does it take to be a god Clive?”

Tiri Drosera- Part of a tribal race of plant people, Tiri and her pet plant dog are a force to be reckoned with. The Forest is her home, and god help anyone who dares enter while she watches over. With a strange color pattern of white skin and silver hair, she certainly sticks out in a crowd, never mind the wood and leather combo outfit. Not that it matters what anyone else thinks, can’t be offended by someone who’s dead. " “Dog could smell your stench from a mile away. Look at him, his eyes are still tearing up.”

Red- The last hero known to be alive. Grief stricken and depressed, Red is currently just following orders from his wicked master, waiting for someone to come along and end his suffering… or to show him how to live again. With an injured leg, a missing finger, and a missing eye, covered by a torn up piece of cloth, it’s surprising to find that he is one of the deadliest people in Mirrah, and beneath his pretty boy face, what with the blue eye and perfect half elf skin and short hair, there’s a dark side to him just waiting to be unleashed. “I’m so sorry… for everything.”

Elle- Slave knight to a powerful dark elf lord, Elle hunts, not because she want’s to, but because she doesn’t know how to think for herself. Fast as lightning with her dwarven forged rapier, she might be one of the few who can take on Red in a fair fight. With ash black skin and boy cut silver hair, she has an air of nobility to her, but her perfect posture didn’t come from the slave camps… “A jobs a job. I was told not to worry about the why.”

Joey Freeman- A fire genasi with good looks and a permanent grin, Joey is the only one of our cast who kills, not for any higher purpose or goal. Not because someone told him to or payed him to, but because he enjoys it. A freed pit fighter from the desert wildlands, Joey survived orc gladiators and giant chimeras for a crowd, how is this hunt any different? “It’s always more fun when they bite back.”


Enjoyed what you have put down so far.

One critique I have is; you might want to have a blurb at the start of the story of how the world works; I found it hard to know the time the story took place. Is it midevil times? modern?
How did the humans become almost extinct?

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Could there be a option to play as a dark elf

Ohh since there are horrible people involved will we get the chance to punch said horrible people in the face? The writing’s pretty good and I’m interested in the characters already so I can’t wait to see what else you’ve got in store for us especially personality types and skills of the MC. I’m hoping for a completely badass MC that can kick ass, take names and gives no fucks about what people think like the conviction MC from Deathless city’s thirst just cause I think they were awesome.

Super minor thing but I felt the need to add it so I feel like I’m helping, I think “owner” was misspelt on chapter 1.


Gotta love the way you wrote that.

Haven’t played through it yet (I will in a minute), I just needed to get out there that I actually enjoyed reading your intro, which rarely happens. Very witty and stimulating. :clap:t2:

So the funniest thing happened while I was asleep. I posted a half asleep blurb on the site inviting people to try out my story and, get this, people actually did! It’s still mind boggling to me! Anyways to answer your guys’s questions,
@Damean_WightFlame unfortunately no, that wouldn’t work. I originally wanted people to have the option to play different races, but think of it like this. The dark elves are loosely based off of Nazis. In this case, i’m having you play a a Jew in Nazi Germany. Part of the story is the heavy racism you’ll face and playing as a German in Nazi Germany just wouldn’t be the same.
@WA2000 You know, I actually saw that typo, said I’d get it later, and completely forgot about it. Thanks for the catch. As for the punching people thing… Yes, yes you can. Don’t expect the best outcomes though, you don’t punch bear and expect a hug. As for the kicking ass part… That’s hard to explain. While your character is a knight and has good combat experience, the main cast is composed of cold blooded killers. Each one could take you in a fair fight. But that’s the point, your gonna have to find a way to play dirty. But for most other people yea, you can kick their asses. Wouldn’t be fun if everyone in my story makes you feel small.
@Megus Saved your question for last because I actually have a question for you. I agree with you, the story needs more about how the world works and why its a hell hole. I was planning on adding a intro explaining things but I thought it might flow better if you learned as you went through the story. So here’s the question, which would you prefer, a wall of text at the beginning explaining whats going on, or would you rather find out as you go along?


I am reserving judgement for now since it is so short but I definitely encourage you to write more. :slight_smile:

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I do like to have the story of what happened to be told over time.

But I would also have a brief hint of the time period. For example if your story took place in an apocolyptic the modern age:

The gaurd watched as the horse passed the wreckage of rubber and steel of a bygone era.

But if it is in the midevil age; you might not want to use modern terms like: detective

@AbbyMCGonagall Well that’s an ego booster. Thank you, I really appreciate it.
@FutbolDude21586 Hopefully you’ll be able to give me your thoughts soon, i’m trying to push through the first chapter a fast as possible to get to the good stuff.
@Megus That’s a good idea. I’ll do a bit of rewriting to make this make more sense. To answer that for now though, yes, it’s a medieval era, but its a mix between eras. The world itself is a bit crazy and not everything makes sense, such as Isabel’s cigarettes and Clive being a robot. I’ve taken ideas from different eras and used magic and the intelligence of different races to explain the reasoning’s, but for the most part, you could probably still call bull on a lot of things you might encounter.


@Scarytaco35 Psst. You can summon ppl with their username.
Just like Discord, wthout the user-number thingy.

:thinking:hmmm hrrrmm uhh I’m gonna need you to explain what that means. This is the first time i’ve ever used a forum like this, or even talk on the internet in general.

It’s interesting I wish we could choose race

Just put a @ sign before someone’s username and it will notify them of it like this @Scarytaco35 :stuck_out_tongue:

@Djone1 Well would you look at that. Alright cool. Super, thank you.:grinning:


Great! @Scarytaco35 I would recommend doing the discobot tutorial to learn more forum tricks, also to go back and @ everyone you were replying to in your old posts so that they can see you answered them :stuck_out_tongue:

I’m pretty sure you’re going to have to be really careful on how far you push your characters with their horribleness since if it’s too bad then it’ll be a no no. I’m fairly certain sexual abuse won’t be accepted

Small update, just fixed a few things mentioned and added couple extra pages. Don’t worry, You’ll all get a proper demo soonish.


One way to escape from the wall of text would be introducing us to the world when we are a child in the story.

Interesting characters! I honestly thought Clive was also a human being, but I guess not.


You’re no human, Celestial

should be a comma between those two words.

“I’m”, there should be a comma between those two words and the last highlight is the ending.
Starting quotes, “you’re”. Also, who’s Chris and Jenny? Are they the guards?

@Umbreonpanda Awesome, now that’s what I’m f***ing talking about! Catch all of my spelling errors! Yes! And yea, they’re the guards. Might add a bit more to them. Kinda forgot about them myself to be honest. They become more prominent as the chapter goes on though. Clive being a robot isn’t important yet and the prologue is intentionally vague. He gets explained a lot better as the story goes on. He’s a major character after all.
@Nomad33810 You know I really like that idea. The problem with it is that I would have to completely rewrite what I already have. But if people can’t seem to grasp the larger picture that’s going on, I might do that to help ease people into the setting.
@Vic Ah this is an inevitable issue. Now before anyone gets mad at me, sexual abuse won’t appear right in front of your character as of now, however it’s part of three of the main characters backstories, and I don’t wanna shy away from exploring the topic because it is a major reasoning behind the mentality of the characters. If anyone has questions about any triggering content, I would be more than happy to explain what I have planned for those topics to an extent. Don’t wanna give away too much.