Mommy, We Created a Plot Hole! (A Slice-of-Life Fantasy Adventure) [Updated OCT. 4 +Story World Sneak Peek #2!]

Hello! I just wanna share a couple of things I’m changing in the next update.

I hope most people are okay with this since no one really asked for it, but MC’s twin will now have a different favorite color (and thus gemstone) from your MC, for the same reasons they have a different hair and eye color.

I will also be changing the star locket to gold instead of silver. I originally wanted it to be gold too, but I figured I’d give it a different color to more easily differentiate it visually from the other twin’s locket. I don’t think it’s necessary anymore though, now that the lockets will have different gemstones.

Not only do the gold stars look much nicer in my opinion, it was also pointed out to me that making the star locket silver instead of gold has some totally unintended connotations to the value of the traits it represents.

I hope you like them! And just because I’m curious…

What’s your MC’s favorite color/locket gemstone?
  • Red (Ruby)
  • Orange (Citrine)
  • Yellow (Topaz)
  • Green (Emerald)
  • Blue (Sapphire)
  • Purple (Amethyst)
  • Pink (Rose Quartz)
  • Brown (Smoky Quartz)
  • White (Pearl)
  • Black (Onyx)
  • Rainbow (Opal)

0 voters

6 Likes

I can appreciate the critique about silver being perceived as ‘less valued’ than gold generally is, but personally I find that change a slight shame, as I like silver better than gold. :sweat_smile:

In any case, the lockets all look really good. What metal they are made from is peripheral to their true value, and place in the story at large. Besides, the super powers they grant are more important. :grin:

3 Likes

I love this WIP. The intersection of slice of life and storytelling is so enthralling. The characters are a lot of fun, and I like that there are a ton of options, including ones that seem unique to your past choices (is that what the star symbol means?).

Also, thank you for including mythology as its own separate genre. It almost always gets subsumed into fantasy but they’re very different! I love all the unique genre related bits for mythology (which I assume is paralleled for the other genres too).

1 Like

@Franzinyte

I think the theme change into slice-of-life is a good direction to take. It really allows more connection between the npc/mc and your audience.

As of now, I think your biggest author issue to keep in mind is: more explored themes and less explored themes … something that has to happen, but if a person wants more introverted exploration, plot points like looking out on the courtyard are more important, where the extroverted seeking people would want a more in depth scene, teasing Wayne about his “old” friends…

I don’t think you as an author can do more than you already do, but I know how important it is for you to try to please as many people as you can. I do think you’ll need to keep yourself from trying to do too much.

1 Like