Mommy, We Created a Plot Hole! (A Slice-of-Life Fantasy Adventure) [+New Title Poll!]

Hello everyone! I know I made a poll earlier about whether I should split the update into two parts, but unfortunately I don’t think I’ll honor the results. :pensive:

I’ll be very busy once again soon, and all the editing I’ve made almost feels like writing a new chapter in terms of workload. I could delay the update further, but I won’t be able to work with a peace of mind knowing that I have a half-finished update lying around.

The update should come out within the next two weeks, or earlier if I feel like it. At minimum, it will contain just the edits, and at best, I will have the whole Chapter 2 complete and the Tumblr ready.

Anyway, here’s the incomplete change log to get you hyped (seriously, just look at how much stuff I changed):


📝 v2.2 (Level Twelve Update)

STORY

• Chapter Two is now completed!
• MC and Twin are now 12 years old. JM is now 11 years old.
• Lily and JM’s introduction songs are now available!
• To improve pacing and reduce filler chapters, the story is now set one day later. Choices and story elements have been adjusted to fit the new timeline:

  • The story now begins on Feb. 28, during Roselyna’s birthday.
  • Ma’am Bianes is now leaving LCU after the school year.
  • The reconciliation scene has been revamped to be more thematic. MC no longer fully forgives their twin, regardless of starting relationship. The fight is supposed to be an ongoing source of tension.
  • Added more reasons to hate B(?)
  • Wayne’s fieldtrip waiver now has a signature!
  • Wayne and Roselyna’s introduction songs now segue into their short stories.
CHARACTERS

• Roselyna’s parents, Kuya Patrick, and Wayne’s dad are now introduced.
• Adjusted character personalities:

  • Roselyna should now be slightly less childish.
  • Wayne should now be slightly less silly, and will no longer react angrily when telling Roselyna to be less childish.
  • JM should hopefully no longer come off as manipulative.
  • The locket choice also now has a more significant effect on the twin’s personality—they will be more silly and stubborn in addition to being emotional if they’re wearing the Heart Locket, while they will be more practical and down-to-earth in addition to being reserved if they’re wearing the Star Locket.

• Twin always trusts Lily now.
• Twin will now only be in the Class Top 10 if you have the [Competitive] Trait.
• Twin no longer wears glasses if MC wears glasses. This was almost never addressed anyway.
• Added two more seatmates(?)

CHOICES

• Moved the disciplined/stubborn student choice to the prologue.
• Added a ‘good ending’ choice to the list of endings you can choose to write for the bedtime story.
• Added two separate choices where you can choose whether and why you still love/believe/hate/resent Maggie.
• Added a choice where chubby and formerly chubby MCs can choose whether they like calling themselves ‘huggable’ and ‘fluffy’ as well. They will also no longer automatically gain bonus relationship with Roselyna.
• Added dream job choice which also determines you and your twin’s character class. Your short story genre and birthday wish will influence the suggested classes presented.
• Added an extra starting relationship choice with JM that increases Discipline & Silly.
• Added a choice where you can pick if you have experienced snow before if you were born in another country.
• Added a choice where [Acrophobe] MCs can choose to hold your twin’s hand when going down the stairs.
• Added a choice where you can select where the Friends 6Ever Headquarters is.
• Added a choice where you can tell Roselyna how to deal with bullies.
• Revamped various choice trees: Certain choices will now either help or hinder your friends’ character arcs, which are tracked via hidden variables.
• The seat position choice now also determines who your seatmate is.
• Removed the Silly/Sensible Twin and Disciplined/Stubborn Twin choices, as well as the choice of whether they trust Lily.
• Removed the Wayne and Roselyna LQ choice because it was redundant.
• Removed the negative/hostile deal choices after hugging B. Hugging B is also no longer possible if you pushed Roselyna away earlier.
• Removed choice about forging Wayne’s waiver.
• You can name your stuffed toy again(?)
• You can now select a bestfriend(?)

STATS AND MECHANICS

• Added a new phobia: [Arachnophobe].
• Added new traits: [Young Padawan], [Musically Averse], [Cryptolingual], a second [Genre Lover] Trait, and a class-specific trait.

  • The [Young Padawan] trait gives you a 30% EXP Bonus, and is acquired if you don’t pick a class/dream job.
  • The [Musically Averse] trait gives you a choice to skip each musical scene.
  • The [Cryptolingual] trait unlocks a secret language exclusive to you and your twin.

• Adjusted how relationship changes are handled, so certain choices are more/less impactful than before in the long run. For example, a simple disagreement with a character won’t have a lasting effect anymore.
• Personality Stats can now decrease instead of giving points to the opposing stat to better reflect some choices, since “—Honest” isn’t necessarily the same as “+Manipulative”. This also means that some choices may be more/less impactful than before.
• Diary is now fully accessible!

ART

• Updated character art and cover art.
• Brandon/Beatrice no longer has placeholder art.
• Updated a few headers and certain heart locket gems.
• Added inventory and trinket icons.

CHANGES AND FIXES

• Increased XP needed to level up to 130,000.
• Playthrough codes are now more compact.
• Edited and trimmed down some scenes and awkward/tangential dialogue to improve scene flow.
• Doubled B’s starting negative relationship because it was too easy to increase for the first encounter.
• The airport choice no longer specifically mentions Lungsod City as Maggie’s hometown.
• The ‘Personality Stats Guide’ has been expanded and renamed to just ‘Stats Guide’, and is no longer written in first person(?)
• [Stoic] MCs no longer automatically give hugs in public even if they have Physical Touch as their love language. Trait description has been updated accordingly.
• Added emojis to certain choices. Changed star and heart choice symbols to emojis. Most star symbols have been removed from choices with variable wording but with no special requirements.
• Removed certain secrets that weren’t very secrety.
• Adjusted personality and relationship stats from various choices.
• Alternate text has been added to most images.
• Sprinkled in more references.
• And most importantly, Roselyna is now slightly more huggable.


I’m also cooking up some very exciting stuff in the near future, so stay tuned! :shushing_face:

27 Likes

Seeing everything from the change log, i’m super excited to play v2.2 already!

2 Likes

I noticed what i think are a few mistakes and one sentence I didnt think made a lot of sense.

Summary

I think it should be “has” here

Here i got the feeling it should be “We had” I could be worng in this one tho!

“Had” again I think

“Were” because its in the past I think


“Would” I think


Is Paddy Patrick? In the “wasn’t” I think it’s “weren’t”. Regarding him being like a father to them that is a litle strange since he is a kid himself.

I havent started chapter 1 yet but until now i’m really liking this book, i think its pretty interesting and well writen :slight_smile:

1 Like

Hello! I know it’s been more than a month since I made my last post, buuut now I’ve learned my lesson about making any promises. I clearly underestimated the stuff that I still need to write, and I’ll admit that I’ve fallen into the trap (again) of trying to edit as I write instead of just writing it all out. It’s also just draining to write different personalities at once, especially in first person.

On my last update post Chapter 2 was approaching 40k words (including code), but now it’s almost 50k! That’s already more than double the length of Chapter 1, although I’m pretty sure that a large part of it is because of all the variations… I hope so, at least. :sweat_smile:

I never really stopped writing, but I just want to make this post so that I can clear my headspace and permit myself to stop working on MWCAPH! for the next several weeks so I can focus on other stuff. :shushing_face:


@M_Trakar Sorry for the late reply, but I appreciate all the reports! I implemented some of your suggestions, but unless it’s a blatant error, I think it’s fine to leave most of them that way. ‘Me and my twin’ is grammatically incorrect, after all. I do agree that the sentence with Patrick is a bit awkward though!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the rest of it! Sorry that the update is coming a lot later than intended.

17 Likes

I gotta say, this is one of the most unique wips I’ve ever seen! I really wish you luck because I love this concept.

3 Likes

Hiii! I can finally get back to writing again!

Sooo, I’ve actually been working on an animation as my one of my final projects. I wanted to create a trailer for MWCAPH!, but unfortunately it didn’t get approved, so I had to settle for the next best thing and create the prologue instead. It’s complete, but it’s incredibly rushed, so I’m not sure I actually want to share it just yet. It needs an awful lot of polishing before it’s presentable, but I don’t think I can do that in the foreseeable future.

So here’s a preview instead!





@Nell Thank you! I hope you enjoyed reading it. I’m excited to finally be done with the next update!

33 Likes

Very Fun and Unique WIP! :smiley:

I like the plot a lot! As a Filipino, I’d say this is really relatable for me.

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Oh my god, this is totally off topic, but these previews remind me of these cartoons I used to watch on youtube or whenever I visited my family in Bangladesh. I’m looking forward to it!

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Please tell me there will be more chapters! I really loved this, I could make my mc exactly like me, like a annoying and cold girl (but deep down is actually a very sweet girl) who is mad with her mother because she left her, and doesn’t get along with her twin because he’s totally different from her. This. Is. Amazing. :rainbow:

1 Like

Hello everyone! Chapter 2 is mostly complete, but while you wait, here’s a little sneak peek of the revamped twin reconciliation scene. It’s all in code, unfortunately, but there’s no way I can show the variations in just a couple of screenshots.

For some context: Just before this snippet, you get to choose the reason why you still love/believe/hate/resent Maggie, with MC and Twin then deciding to fight the story’s villains (and unifying their short stories) together. The the/this/thim are the twin’s pronouns, by the way.

Summary
[i][b]${sibtwin}[/b] has joined the party![/i][n/][n/]
*if (heartlocket)
	*if (loveshugs)
		$!{the} scratches ${this} head. "Come on, I know you've been waiting to do it."
		
		And with no telepathy necessary… I close my eyes and throw myself towards ${thim}@{emotional , as my eyes start doing what they do best|}. And for the first time in a long while, ${the} doesn't complain.
	*else
		$!{the} closes ${this} eyes, when ${the} suddenly throws ${thim}self towards me.
		
		[i]A hug.[/i] $!{the} almost never does that. And that's when you know ${the} really means it.
		
		*if (hateshugs)
			The hug connects, and for the first time in a long while, I don't complain. 
		I @{hateshugs let ${thim} pull me|pull ${thim}} closer@{emotional  as my eyes start doing what they do best|, and close my eyes with a smile}.
*else
	$!{the} closes ${this} eyes, and throws ${thim}self towards me. 
	
	*if (loveshugs)
		We meet in the middle, no telepathy necessary. 
	*if (hateshugs)
		The hug connects, and for the first time in a long while, I don't complain. 
	I'm a little surprised it took ${thim} this long to finally hug me—usually it's the first thing ${the} does after we fight.
	
	I @{hateshugs let ${thim} pull me|pull ${thim}} closer@{emotional  as my eyes start doing what they do best|, and close my eyes with a smile}.

*if (loveshugs) and (starlocket)
	We both hold onto each other for a long while. Just me and my ${tlilbig} ${tsibling}, ${hugging} in a sunset-lit school corridor… at least, until we have to breathe.
*elseif (loveshugs)
	And so I hold onto ${thim} for a long while. Just me ${hugging} my ${tlilbig} ${tsibling} in a sunset-lit school corridor… at least, until I force myself to pull away to let ${thim} breathe.
*elseif (starlocket)
	And so I let ${thim} hold onto me for a long while. Just my ${tlilbig} ${tsibling}, squeezing me in a sunset-lit school corridor… Typical day, really.
*else
	It'd be barely considered a hug @{wordy according to ${Roselyna}'s standards|if you ask ${Roselyna}}, but considering neither of us are cuddlebugs, it's long enough for both of us.

*if (emotional)
	I take @{glasses off my foggy eyeglasses and wipe them|a moment to wipe my eyes} with the ${color} @{wordy handkerchief|hanky} ${the} threw at me earlier, and 
	*if (starlocket)
		then I wipe ${this} eyes as well.
	*else
		tuck it back to ${this} pocket. 
I'd say that it feels like something heavy was lifted off my chest, but I guess there's a reason why it's a cliché. 
*if (lovelanguage = "words")
	My ${tsibling} saying that ${the} wants to continue ${this} story with me? That's the best thing I've heard all day.
*elseif (lovelanguage = "touch")
	Getting @{(precocious_percent > 80) oxytocin from my ${tsibling}|to ${hug} my ${tsibling} again} does feel like that.
*elseif (lovelanguage = "time")
	I can't wait to spend time and continue our stories together, just like it's old—well, backstory times.
*elseif (lovelanguage = "gifts")
	My ${tsibling} wanting to continue ${this} story with me is the greatest gift I could ask for right now.
*else
	My ${tsibling} wanting to continue ${this} story with me is better than any gift or apology ${the} could ever give.
*if (acrophobe)
	$!{the} moves closer to the @{(height = 1) flower beds|railings}, and peers into the abyss that is the quad below.

	I don't follow, of course. I'm perfectly fine staying here, where I'm safe and—

	$!{the} reaches out for my hand. "Come on, I'll hold you."

	I grip ${this} hand reluctantly, and inch closer towards ${thim}. With another hand on the railings, I follow ${this} 
*else
	I move closer to the @{(height = 1) flower beds|railings}, and peer into the quad below.

	$!{the} doesn't follow, of course. $!{the}'s always scared of falling off no matter how many railings you put in front of ${thim}.

	I reach out for ${this} hand. "$!{cmon}, I'll hold you."

	$!{the} grips my hand reluctantly, as ${the} inches closer towards me. With another hand on the railings, ${the} follows my 
gaze towards a pair of students with their arms open rushing towards—I assume—their mother.

And for a moment, it's just the noise of the other students being picked up by their parents—both literally and not literally. Some happy their suffering has finally ended, some of them getting the scolding of their lives. It's funny how dismissal can both be the best and worst part of school.

@{acrophobe My heart almost jumps when|Then I} feel a gentle weight on my shoulder. "@{oldlocketpic I don't think I'm|I'm sure you're not} ready to say sorry to $!{mommy} yet, but… I'm sorry for being a terrible ${tsibling}."

I take ${this} hand off me and look at the floor, our own shadows stiff and steady against the fluttering fern shadows. I'm glad we're @{starting_rel ${bestie}s|friends|siblings} again, but I'm not ${gonna} apologize to ${thim} for @{mommy_feeling still loving|still believing in|being angry at|being resentful of} $!{mommy}.
*page_break "Then that's good enough for me."

Any feedback is welcome!


@Hector.Jones I’m glad you liked it! And just wait for Chapter 2 – there’ll be a lot more familiar things to see!

@Kethmos Thank you! Unfortunately I won’t be working on it anytime soon, but I hope you enjoy reading the story!

@Kimotski Hi there, welcome to the community! And yup, Chapter 2 is almost complete, so just sit tight!

10 Likes

That’s great to hear! To celebrate, here is my coloring of the Valdez twins, Remy (left) and Ryan (right)! i hope you folks like my OCs.

12 Likes

super excited!

1 Like

As a born and bred Filipino, I love this SO MUCH! You perfectly captured the feel of being a kid of such tender young age. As someone relatively young with those memories fresh in my mind still, you’ve really struck a chord with me here.
(And of course, when upon reading, I noticed Tagalog being spoken, I couldn’t help when given the option to model the twins after me and my own sister)
With all the well-written choices, you can really act like an actual 12-year-old grade-schooler. I could really easily just act like I did when I was 11 or 12: act just like I did (and, well, do) with my sister… everything you put into this just makes me think ‘wow’!
Basically, I loved it and am supporting you 100%!

5 Likes

rtpassed
:eyes:

11 Likes

v2.2 update

New word count (including code): ~130,000+
New average words per playthrough: ~40,000

Ver. 2.2 Highlights

  • Chapter Two is now complete! The story is now set one day later to improve pacing.
  • MC and Twin are now 12 years old. The reconciliation scene has been revamped to be more thematic.
  • You can now choose the reason why you still love/believe or hate/resent Maggie.
  • You now get the option to skip songs if you choose to skip the first song.
  • You can now select your character class/dream job.
  • Adjusted stats and character personalities according to feedback.
  • 10+ new traits, 1 new sidequest, 1 new trinket, and 3 new secrets to be discovered!
  • Increased save slots to 12.
  • Roselyna is now slightly more huggable.

The full update notes can be viewed in the demo.


The update is finally here!

Just a few things before I go:

  • Please report any bugs, typos, missing images, or formatting issues!
  • The diary entries are still missing, but I hope to include them soon.
  • I haven’t updated the survey results at all because of the huge backlog. I probably won’t update it anytime soon, but the results and the feedback have been very helpful! If you’ve answered the survey before, I’d appreciate it if you can send me your playthrough code again!
  • Lastly, let me know what you think of the update!

…I should probably go sleep. :zzz:

25 Likes

Wow that was a long update
First things first my code is 13114710-NAJ-HD-FQKR
EJ-XP-5N-3J-1G-2G-1Z-L
AABDFQ42ZMD2R-6YNIGX

Also there were a couple of bugs

Stat Screen

Once I opened the diary and left stat screen, it saved the screen on diary, which is good. But after some time when I went to check my stats it was not possible to return to the MAIN stat screen. Even after going to family page and clicking return to character stat screen it gave an error

Black Background

From chapter 2 onwards some of the headings in both the Diary section of Stat screen and the Game itself do not invert to white which makes it difficult to read. This is probably a quick fix so doesn’t bother me that much but it sure was annoying whenever I went to the stat screen

I loved all the quests and secrets that we can find. Is there a guide on where to find the trinkets, I managed to find 2 out of 3 while the secrets were even less - 6 out of 11. I wonder if it is possible to optimise to get all of them in a single run. One question I had was if the stats were being used yet in the story. So far I don’t think I had any options that I could not choose due to my Stats( Personality stats specifically) . I wonder if that is something that will be more prominent from Chapter 3 onwards. Another thing, Is it possible to have the character drawings in our diary as well? Looking forward to solving all the subquests.

1 Like

I noticed some choices are grayed out. Will they be selectable in the final game?

1 Like

If i remember correctly, some choices are dependent on certain stats (like you can’t skip class if you value conduct) while others are for the New Game+.

1 Like

@Abe Wow! This is a very nice surprise! :blush:

I’m not sure how they’d react to being called cute, but I love them! I especially like the detail of Ryan not wearing his locket (but Remy’s locket is nice too!). Thank you! :blue_heart:

@Deerdoe Sorry for the late reply, but thank you so much! I’m glad you can relate to the MC really well. I hope you enjoy the new update!

@ielle I appreciate the interest! Let me know what you think of the update.

@Big_fan1231 Thank you for the bug reports! I think I fixed them now, but I don’t have time to manually test them right now.

Reply to your feedback

I’m glad you liked the quests and secrets!

No, there isn’t a guide, but I will probably make one in the future once there’s more content. My goal is to make all trinkets obtainable in a single playthrough (there’s an achievement for it), but some of them are intentionally placed out of the way so you’re encouraged to stray away and explore a little. Not sure about the secrets, but there’ll be achievements for discovering all the secrets for each character.

There aren’t very many choices locked due to personality stats, since I don’t want to restrict them based on your personality unless it really makes sense (like you not being able to pick “Maybe it’s time for us to go on different schools” if you have a high Reliant stat). Personality stat checks are checked frequently though, they affect the MC’s vocabulary and how they react to most situations. My favorite one is the MC skipping over the colored tiles in the library if they have a higher Naive stat). If you have a higher introvert stat, some choices actually appear first in the list.

Special interactions are marked with a star (and sometimes hearts), but they are more often unlocked with traits, not personality stats.

Anyway, sorry if that’s a little long, but I’m glad someone else is interested in the mechanics! Feel free to ask more questions about them.

This is a good idea, actually! I’ll include it when I update the diary. Speaking of, do you have any theories about the sidequests (Aunt Julie’s secret will be a sidequest too)?


@Kelly_Seastar Grayed out choices most likely mean you didn’t meet the requirement, but some of them are part of the MC’s thoughts and intentionally unpickable. You can’t decline the first quest, for example.


v2.2.1 Hotfix

  • Diary headers now properly turn to white on a black background.
  • Fixed the issue where you can get stuck reading the diary (may require starting a new game).
  • Fixed the issue where some of the hugs didn’t increase your hug counter.
  • Fixed the ‘fantasy’ typo.
  • Clarified some text in the street food scene.
11 Likes

Update’s great! Also, did you revamp the character art? I noticed it looks nicer, or maybe it’s just my imagination

1 Like