Yay! Hmm…now that Ments can’t read us that means it would be safe to touch Gray. So will we finally get to touch Gray?
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This!!! I need this so bad 
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oh god. that would be awesome!!
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We’re gonna need an adult thread if we’re suddenly allowed to hold hands. 
On a more serious note, when Glitch helps Button get away from the hospital, certain “private thoughts” can increase K’s relationship% even if you had only interacted with Glitch so far. Like the southpark thing, which is hilarious because it indicated K was probably thinking something similar. That option probably let K see that Button is sincere about giving Glitch a chance. But all that begs the question… When did Nick arrive in Button’s head? 
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I feel like the strings attaching Nick’s consciousness to his body were cut and Button’s visitation complicated things because instead of those strings getting repaired or something, it just got latched onto the easiest vessel it could find- Button’s brain. Nick’s brain being a max security prison and Button’s brain being a public park could explain why Nick psyche couldn’t reattach to him or latched onto anybody else either. I feel like I’m talking out of my arse at this point lol
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Oh my gosh, I LOVE this WIP. I mean, everyone loves it, and folks over on Reddit keep bringing it up but please put down my name as the 846226th person who loves it. And I love Nicky Mouse too! And most of the other ROs (except for our lovely bestie, who very much belongs with Nick! In fact, I think now would be the perfect time to find out what our dear brother thinks about Sally.)
Having said that, I’m that annoying teacher who keeps seeing issues and then feels the need to bring them to people’s notice so here goes a rather lengthy post. (And I apologise in advance!)
How do you pronounce MIV? Because if it’s Em I Vee, then you must use “an” instead of “a”, right? But if you pronounce it the way people pronounce the name Liv, then maybe mention it somewhere? 
This says “Even he’s a Ment…” but I think it should be “Even though he’s a Ment…”? Or simply “Despite being a Ment…?”
I think the word “a” needs to be inserted before “janitorial closet”. And maybe a word after “a Bluetooth”? Or you could simply say “Bluetooth” and remove the “a”?
I think “proximity” is misspelt.
“its” is accidentally spelt with an apostrophe
I think it should be “broadcast”, not “broadcasted”, and “ways in which they would die”.
“how relaxed the other team appears” (rather than “teams appear”).
Umm anyway, I caught a few more but some people find comments like this very annoying so I’ll hold off unless you want feedback of this type!
Again, a wonderful, gorgeous book. And I cannot wait to read it in its entirety!
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y’know, nick turning up alive is nice and all, but it kinda seems like button takes it a little too much in stride if ya know what i mean. like if they were super depressed and guilty about nick possibly dying wouldn’t their reaction to finding out he was alive be to start crying bucketloads worth of tears of joy and running around yelling into everyone’s ears that nick-nack’s still with them?
i mean for the most part it’s fine and all, but most of the reactions we get are kinda…subdued compared to our previous grief. no relieved breakdown or anything
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Not quite! Could you elaborate a bit more as to what you’d like to see? One of the reactions is to start weeping, and then there’s a short time skip between that and the kitchen scene. I figured players would head canon Button’s and Nick’s conversation, with Button being as collected or wrought as they feel appropriate. (I tend to skim over scenes that repeats information readers already know.) Unless you mean Button is too calm when interacting with John? Because that part could potentially be expanded on.
@HappyPotato This kind of feedback is EXTRADORINARILY helpful and MUCH appreciated!!! Usually I’m an editing fiend (seriously, I’ve done it professionally and it’s part of my current job as an ESL teacher), but it’s near impossible for me to edit my own work without a gap of few months between the writing and rewrite. Otherwise, my brain simply inserts what I think should be there instead of what is actually there (perfect example, I recently taught a freaking class about the “an” before M when pronounced as “em” and yet still made that mistake myself!).
So please, please, please, everyone, share all the typos and issues that you notice. It makes my life immeasurably easier.
That makes sense! I don’t think I’d ever be able to write this type of dynamic, however. Not being able to know whom you’re in love with boggles my mind. Poly, sure, because then you ethically choose to romance both. But I’m from a chronically indecisive family (whom I love dearly, just in case they read this), and I became overly opinionated to compensate. It’s really hard for me to write options that I can’t relate to at all, and it’s also not that enjoyable for me as a creator 
Let’s just say that the stereotypical “Guess Who!” greeting of sneaking up from behind and covering someone’s eyes with your hands becomes surprisingly intense.
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Question for everyone willing to answer, because I’ve reached an impasse with my internal debate. When choosing from several major scenes (i.e. who you spend time with), would you rather see but not be able to select the choices that you don’t qualify for or have them hidden? Usually I keep them hidden, but with big decisions (like RO routes, etc.) I wonder if it would be better to have them grayed out so that readers know options are available that they didn’t get (due to not meeting someone or having a good enough relationship).
I’ll still hide the variation not available if it involves the same person (like Glitch, who has a date and a non-date option depending on how you interacted in earlier texts), but should I hide all of K’s options for people who never interacted with K? Or would you rather at least one be seen so that you know that you can meet K earlier in another playthrough?
Choices You Don’t Get (Involving ROs)
- Show grayed out.
- Keep them hidden!
0 voters
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Personally if I see a grayed out option, that would motivate me even more to do multiple playthroughs! It might annoy me for a little bit that some options aren’t immediately available, but it’ll be good for the game’s replayability hahaha.
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Must agree with Violet. Those are my exact sentiments when it comes to grayed out options being a tool to inform, even if you can’t choose them. 
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Agreed, sometimes there are just those hidden options that gets missed entirely when i play something, and if they’re greyed out I’m gonna be working hard to unlock it.(I still don’t know why i like playing VN and Choice game even though my indecisiveness and curiosity is frying my brain every time i play)
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Personally I’m somewhere in the middle. I like knowing they are there but not what they are. Like instead of a greyed out option it said -locked-. Or maybe even the stat that is keeping it locked. Example - relationship with Fred to low- give you more of an idea what to look for but not exactly what the option will be.
I’m probably strange though. I like knowing they are there to look for but not exactly what they are. Yes I made my parent wrap my birthday presents even when I knew what they were…
But between the options given, I would rather have them greyed out so I at least know they are there.
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This is good
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Honestly I prefer hidden, it kinda takes me out of the moment to see greyed out options that aren’t relevant to my MC 
it’s not a deal breaking preference though I’d be fine either way 
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I enjoyed reading this. I will look for updates in the future.
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I prefer hidden, just for immersion’s sake - grayed out options often make me put on the brakes and try to think what I did to miss the option, and it takes a minute for my ADHD ass to get back on the story thread. It seems I’m in the minority, though, and while mildly frustrating, grayed out options are far from a dealbreaker.
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I voted for having locked options greyed out! It adds to the replayability for me since it’ll allow me to see that there’s stuff I’m missing out on being able to choose (thus the fun of exploring how exactly to get those options unlocked). But I do understand those who say that it may break the immersion for them.
I wonder if there’s a way for the player to select if they wish to see these locked options or not? I’ve played CoG games before where players could toggle certain features (such as turning on the ability to see stat increase or decrease numbers, or skipping over scenes entirely if they had to do with content warnings the player didn’t want to read about). So maybe there’s a way at the beginning of the story for the reader to select if they want to be able to see greyed out options? Would result in more coding for sure, but it might be something worth looking into if it’s possible!
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It’d certainly break everybody’s saves, what with adding a new variable that’s set by the player on initialization of Mind Blind’s demo, but that’s actually very doable as a happy medium.
Might take two versions of the same choice scene to keep things easier to sort through, though. By this, I mean the version with the grayed out options would be simpler to wrap up, while the one with the show/hide functionality will need some more hands on nitty gritty.
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yeah kinda what i meant. sure button might have an emotional internal reunion with nick offscreen, but being externally emotional to everyone else and stuff would also be nice.
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