Lords of Infinity

gender-locked-male
low-fantasy
#4950

“Pfft, you pansy. I was close enough to get my head blown up.”
-Maurice Rose, probably.

I mean, US generals ran the gamut from “hiding in a hole under a mountain 100 km behind the lines” like Fredendall, or literally “too close for his own good” like McNair.

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#4951

Not his fault Bradley decided to do a parallel bombing against the advice of every single one of his officers and air force generals.

#4952

I’d argue that the Qing Empire was screwed since the Zhou Dynasty, personally. :slight_smile:

Every Chinese Empire before the Communist Party had to deal with the problem of trying to govern an empire the size of Alexander’s with pre-modern technology, and any united China would inevitably collapse under its own weight. Hell, the Chinese had known that for millennia. So I’m a little skeptical of both the Self-Strengthening Movement and the Macartney Mission as possible fixes for China.

I think that focusing on the Beiyang Army and trying to create a single modern sub-state in China instead of modernizing the whole thing was a good move on Cixi’s part, since the Beiyang Clique was actually strong enough to replace the Qing with a fairly effective hegemony. It might even have worked in the long run if Yuan Shikai’s kidneys hadn’t shut down right after a major blunder.

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#4953

That isn’t mutually exclusive with using the Macartney Mission as a starting point.

The “build a modernised state-within-a-state” strategy is one which both Jiang Jieshi and Deng Xiaoping ended up using. In both cases, it was more or less successful (at least, before the Japanese showed up and ruined everything in Jiang’s case). All I’m really saying is that by the time Cixi got her hands on the levers of power, China was already riddled with foreign legations, and possessed minimal power over its own trade and foreign policy.

I’d say that by that point, the Qing lacked the political legitimacy and the material resources to make modernisation work. If they’d started before the Opium Wars and the Taiping Rebellion, then their shot at building a modern China within China suddenly increase a lot.

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#4954

Touche, though I’m not sure that the Macartney Mission could have led to China not being overrun by foreign legations as you’re suggesting. Britain’s interest in China was not that great at this point, yet opening the country to the British would have had France and Russia knocking on the door as well. And, of course, I don’t see the Qing continuing to tolerate the opium or slave trades if they’d had any say in the matter.

#4955

I think Britain was more interested in paying for tea than selling Opium. If the EIC was able to do so by selling other goods instead (say, mechanical reapers and caplock muskets), then they probably would have done it.

The real issue would have been trying to ensure that Company political officers didn’t start embedding themselves into local governments the way they did in India, but seeing as the Qing already had some understanding of how European trading companies operated with the VOC, that might have been easier done.

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#4956

Some more Soviet jokes…

  • Three men are sitting in a cell in the (KGB headquarters) Dzerzhinsky Square. The first asks the second why he has been imprisoned, who replies, “Because I criticized Karl Radek.” The first man responds, “But I am here because I spoke out in favor of Radek!” They turn to the third man who has been sitting quietly in the back, and ask him why he is in jail. He answers, “I’m Karl Radek.”
  • “Lubyanka (KGB headquarters) is the tallest building in Moscow. You can see Siberia from its basement.”
  • Armenian Radio was asked: “Is it true that conditions in our labor camps are excellent?” Armenian Radio answers: “It is true. Five years ago a listener of ours raised the same question and was sent to one, reportedly to investigate the issue. He hasn’t returned yet; we are told that he liked it there.”
  • Vladimir Lenin, Joseph Stalin, Nikita Khrushchev and Leonid Brezhnev are all travelling together in a railway carriage. Unexpectedly, the train stops. Lenin suggests: “Perhaps we should announce a subbotnik, so that workers and peasants will fix the problem.” Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, “If the train does not start moving, the driver will be shot!” (An allusion to the Great Purge.) But the train doesn’t start moving. Khrushchev then shouts, “Let’s take the rails from behind the train and use them to lay the tracks in front”. (An allusion to Khrushchev’s various reorganizations.) But still the train doesn’t move. Then Brezhnev says, “Comrades, Comrades, let’s draw the curtains, turn on the gramophone and pretend we’re moving!” (An allusion to the Brezhnev stagnation period.) A later continuation to this has Mikhail Gorbachev saying, “We were going the wrong way anyways!” and changing the train’s direction (alluding to his policies of glasnost and perestroika ), and Boris Yeltsin driving the train off the rails and through a field.
  • An old crone had to wait for two hours to get on a bus. Bus after bus arrived filled with passengers, and she was unable to squeeze herself in as well. When she finally did manage to clamber aboard one of them, she wiped her forehead and exclaimed, “Finally, glory to God!” The driver said, “Mother, you must not say that. You must say ‘Glory to comrade Stalin!’.” “Excuse me, comrade,” the woman replied. “I’m just a backward old woman. From now on I’ll say what you told me to.” After a while, she continued: “Excuse me, comrade, I am old and stupid. What shall I say if, God forbid, Stalin dies?” “Well, then you may say, ‘Glory to God!’”
  • At a May Day parade, a very old Jew carries a placard which reads, “Thank you, comrade Stalin, for my happy childhood!” A Party representative approaches the old man. “What’s that? Are you mocking our Party? Everyone can see that when you were a child, comrade Stalin hadn’t yet been born!” The old man replies, “That’s precisely why I’m grateful to him!”
  • Stalin loses his favourite pipe. In a few days, Lavrenti calls Stalin: “Have you found your pipe?” “Yes,” replies Stalin. “I found it under the sofa.” “This is impossible!” exclaims Beria. “Three people have already confessed to this crime!”
  • The KGB, the GIGN (or in some versions of the joke, the FBI) and the CIA are all trying to prove they are the best at catching criminals. The Secretary General of the UN decides to set them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest, and each of them has to catch it. The CIA people go in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations, they conclude that the rabbit does not exist. The GIGN (or FBI) goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and make no apologies: the rabbit had it coming. The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: “Okay! Okay! I’m a rabbit! I’m a rabbit!”
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#4957

Im surprised its not Konstantin Konstantinev Konstantinovich.

My name is basically something to that effect.

Soviet jokes? Soviet.

What was Stalin doing to the invading German troops? He was stalin.

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#4958

I’ve seen a comic version of this one. The bear comes out bruised and bleeding in the last panel declaring “I am rabbit, my mother and father were rabbits…”

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#4959

@Cataphrak There should be a mention of our valour during the 12 years of war, when we meet the lady to whom we are engaged, or atleast her father should commend us for our gallantry service. We are the gryphon of rendower, TWICE!

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#4960

Now, this is just me, but I probably think the bethrowed is more interested in getting to know us as a person rather then via our reputation. Sure, we won multiple medals, we’re a war hero, but she’s more interested in “if we are a right match for her”, hence why her interest in us grows if we successfully bond in our first meeting.

But that’s my point. I don’t want to be liked because “Hey, he got the Gryphon of Rendower, twice I might add.” I want to be liked because “oh, he’s a charming lord” or “oh, he’s knowledgeable” like any other normal baneblood person engaged to another baneblood. I personally wouldn’t hold it against the bethrowed or her father if they don’t acknowledge my military career. I rather be acknowledged of that in appropriate settings, not all the times.

Hence my ‘appropriate settings’ phrase.

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#4961

Either it’s charm or the intellects, in which the mc, I’ve tested needs at least 60 or above in intellect to make a good impression.

The Gryphon won’t be of much uses, except for the part of gaining a certain amount of recognition within the army and if possible: ARC.

#4962

I guess anything’s possible but Castroite nationalism had anti-Americanism as a part of its core, so I think it unlikely.

No, Ho was a better bet for a second Tito, so to speak. But still long odds-Ho in 1946 thought America might help him stop the return of France. Would he have changed his tune after Mao won his war?

That would’ve required a lot of luck, and some pragmatic, long term thinking on the part of people in Washington who really hadn’t demonstrated that at any step, at least not with regard to East Asia.

And that brings us back to Harry Truman. :thinking:

#4963

Questionable. Vietnam has a long history of dealing with Chinese imperialism, so I’d imagine Ho would have seen the PRC as an even more immediate threat - something which did get bourne out when it invaded in '79.

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#4964

You know, I almost entirely disagree with you here.

But it would be hilarious if Cataphrak added a “Brag about my military accomplishments” option with the betrothed, which always had negative effects on the relationship. For obvious reasons.

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#4965

I pretty sure Tierra society have entire humanity thing in the nobility. It does not look good to be a braggart.

#4966

“Oh, so you’re a soldier. Eww.”

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#4967

If I become Councillor-Militant this will be the rule I give to our military attaches.

“Write as if your letters were about to be intercepted.”

Because they will.

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#4968

As the Man Emperor of Mankind Decreed it is a good idea for every single unit from squads to armies to create self referencing idiomatic codes for communications.

That will not backfire in any way.

#4969

“Don’t you worry Sir, I never put things down in writing”

1 Like