Lightweaver: Chosen (WIP) (50k words) (Newest Update 01/04/24)

wow, your writing is wonderful, both in terms of grammar and story. i could picture everything in my head as it was happening, which is no small feat. well done! really looking forward for updates.

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Pretty sure the “her” is wrong as I chose male pronouns for him. Or did I misunderstood something?

Here is another one:

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Nooo beaten before I even had a change to start dig into the code.

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Sounds interesting

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I love both the concept and the execution, this is looking really good

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I have a feeling this story will hit me hard right in the feels. but so far im loving the story as well as the characters. I wonder if its possible to have the headmaster/mistress adopt the MC? I’m feeling the the mommy/daddy vibes practically rolling off them.

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@furyleika Thank you for spotting that mixup! I fixed it now :sparkles: I’m glad you enjoyed it. It can get quite heavy yes… but things can get better! Or not. :crazy_face:

@FabulousBlasphemer I realized that it’ll give me better opportunities to write more potential interactions with all ROs—if they just lived in the same coed dorm building. Thanks for stopping by! :grin:

@Valixon I’ve expanded the world a lot since then, so I changed some things to make more sense :smiley:

@H_J Thank you! I’m glad they didn’t seem too out of place :smile:

@herikkkkk I’m really happy to hear that! I appreciate it a lot :heart:

@Weisskralle Yup those are definitely wrong, thanks for spotting it! Also, I had to ! They’re way too spoilery :smiling_face_with_tear:

@Harley_Robin_Evans & @ls00jb7 Thank you! Hope to see you again on the next update :heart:

@Bulk_Biceps Perhaps. The headmaster will play a big role in MC’s journey :wink:

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Love this!! I don’t usually comment much, but since this was just recently posted, I figured I might as well tell you that I’m looking forward to more!

Ngl, I was waiting for an angsty moment to happen lol, but so far, the story has been sort of bittersweetly wholesome imo and I love it :ok_hand:

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noooo it ended and it was getting reeeeally good!

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Oh angsty moments are there, you just have to be spiraling quite a bit to unlock them :wink:

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recently just gotten back into IFs again and i gotta say, this is one heck of an IF to read after a long time. its so mesmerizing. like you give enough words that its at that right balance where its not overly long nor overly short. love it a lot. also sigh J, oh J. im already smitten. cant wait for more!

have a nice day/night! take care of yourself!

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i enjoyed the demo , i like it

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Finally found some time to get around to this, and I must say Well done @Dakimomoe this is definitely going to bloom into a great IF. I sit in suspense for future updates, as both the characters and writing is French kiss worthy :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::kissing_heart:.

Me finding a lightning user, as the MC
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Me meeting the RO’s
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My poor MC after playing a spiralling life. :worried:
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Me and ever other reader who enjoyed LC.
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Seems like Moddy don’t like me always an error when loading that site. Playing the demo I tried to do my typical MC who is thrust into something without their consent being broody and angery at everyone else that approach them.
I really liked to make my MC give a cold shoulder to all the kindness this new peeps are giving to them at the start. Overall definitely an interesting premise will keep an eye on this in the future, goodluck author. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts: Most importantly I love lightning powers :zap::zap:

Also that one statement of L seeing us fall from the sky made me cringe hard like “I think it was fate”, like wdym? MC’s fate is to suffer and almost fall to their death? Haaay, but anyway L doesn’t know better I understand.:eye::lips::eye:

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“It was fate for you to end up here”
“No it should have been fate for me to get of this miserable ride known as life.”
“What?”
“What?”

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I love this!

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I just noticed all ro’s are all split from short to tall. U can only shorter or taller then all of them.

Also it’s funny the deity that saved mc dyed the mc hair white. I guess they didn’t like our natural hair lol

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Hi! Loved your demo. Literally cant wait for the next update! Great writing style, sympathic MC, and interesting and likeable (and cute) ROs. Thanks for this!

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Ooh, this one is good, was ready to write it off as yet another magic/superhero school setting but no this is too good!

Still have some questions about the world though, what is the overall tech level? The opening bits when mc is getting struck by lightning feel downright Dickensian to me but the magic school has electric lights and the clothes mc has to change into practically scream modern/contemporary plus there’s Leo’s smartphone. So my question is this, is the world/kingdom a place of schizo tech or was the place mc came from particularly backwards and the mc particularly deprived even in that backwards place? If so it’ll be hard adjusting, like a North Korean refugee from the countryside there escaping to the South. :thinking:
And of course there’s the mc’s new “powers” making handling anything electrical potentially that much more of a challenge. :worried:

My mc doesn’t find it funny at all. Expect him to try hair dye, if we’re ever offered the option. Eyebrows are a pain to dye though, you’d need beard dye for that. :worried: Or is mc’s hair magically resistant to hair dye now?

I’m not sure my mc would like that. It kinda feels like to mc like people only want him for his supposedly rare new cosmic consolation prize. I mean if anybody really wanted him they’d have adopted him from the orphanage, right? At least I could easily see his adolescent reasoning go that way.

Ouch, kinda hurtful, though kudo’s to you and a good potential line for mc if they ever get in a serious argument with Leo or Alec.

My mc is a bit less sanguine about it. But the game fortunately provides more reluctant options, my mc is currently on the line of thinking that it is just another thing forced upon him without his consent.

And it seems from some lines in the game mc does not have a positive history with Weavers and powers:

Spoiler

Of course the mc now finds themselves stuck amongst them nonetheless. :worried:

Surprising there were Weavers at all in the orphanage of a podunk village, they seem kinda valuable but it does imply they were treated better than the rest, whatever much that means in the Dickensian hellhole the mc apparently came from. Almost makes me think there’s recently been a big war or something to cause even very valuable kids to become unadopted orphans. :thinking:

Otherwise you’d think they would at least be taken to the kind of fancy place the mc is in now even if they are orphans too.

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The fancy places have tuition, and given who and where they are, they may not be that strong or that rare a talent. Even if the ability itself is rare, say about the same incidence as curly red hair, there are still going to be plenty around to choose from. And an elite school is only going to choose the best and brightest and rarest when it comes to scholarship opportunities. So even if those orphans are known about, they might not raise any of the right kind of interest. They’re likely to be more adoptable because of it, but even “more adoptable” is a relative term. Boys are considered more adoptable than girls. That doesn’t make boys more special than girls, it just makes them more likely to get adopted. In this case, weaver kids are more adoptable than non weaver kids. They’re not going to get some special advantage out of the norm for it though certain things will be easier for them. MC is special not because they are an orphan and a weaver, but because of their type, arrival, and semi-direct contact with their god.

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