Law-Abiding Citizens (WIP) -- Updated 23/08/18 (HUGE HIATUS)

Of course, that was my plan, I didn’t want to make the player kill people :sweat_smile:

I will write the romance routes very different to make it seem very real that your RO is a person with back story, personality and goals. Realism.

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Only two specific characters can be in a poly relationship, and they haven’t been announced it :wink:

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You’re very humble :grin:
I just wanted to thank you again since you did help in a rough spot. But I appreciate your hope that I will get better at it.

Though yes, the game is very romance based, it does have other story elements to enjoy besides romance (or friendship)
You will have to solve a case and etc.
I will try to not be based by the romance.

I get what you mean since I used to do this a lot when writing. But someone told me that that was annoying or something, so I stopped.
Should I edit it and make it like that again?

And here I was talking about the choices that would affect the MC’s personality… I absolutely get what you mean, and I think you’re right.
I think I was too focused on getting past chapter one by introducing the characters and the story.
I will see into this :blush:

Thank you so much for enjoying and spotting my silly mistakes.
I will go into fixing all of them :wrench:

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I’m not romantic either!
I just really reaaaaally like writing and reading romance…

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Thank you, I will see about this and correct them. Currently I’m on mu phone so I can’t really do anything :neutral_face:

That would be like a production of humans :joy:
Me: Hey, what’s your name?
Them: My name is Bob57295407. Nice to meet you.

Thank you for reassuring me though :blush:

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As a bit of follow-up to this, law school is about theory, whereas a police officer needs practical law education. While it’s true a police officer doesn’t go to law school, a police officer typically gets an education that focuses on specific cases, learns why those cases are important and why they affect their job as a police officer. So the police officer takes a few law classes, most of those pertaining to specific cases. Miranda v. Arizona is one of the first cases a police officer learns about, why it is important, and how it affects their job. Not long after that, they learn Terry v. Ohio.

That being said, there are (as far as I know) four ways to become a police officer. 1) Get a criminal justice degree (2 year or 4 year doesn’t matter - just has a difference in starting pay usually, and not much at that) then follow up with SKILLS. 2) Go to a police academy. This one is falling out of favor it seems, but it is still an option. Typically this is the option one takes after coming out of the Explorer program. This has SKILLS classes mixed in with the practical law education. 3) Join the military, do your 4 years, come back and apply. Most agencies have a military preferential hiring practice, and will usually send the new hire out to get the practical law education needed, as well as a few of the skills they’d get in SKILLS training. 4) Transfer from another department inside the agency. A dispatcher can transfer to corrections or patrol. A corrections officer can transfer to patrol (or dispatch even), and a patrol officer can transfer to either corrections or dispatch. Once transferred, eventually the transferee will then take SKILLS training and receive practical law education. (in some agencies, they also go to a police academy) Typically all four ways will at one point have time spent as a ride-along before actually being allowed to do anything other than ride with and do paperwork. Once they are deemed ‘ready’ they are allowed to start taking cases and going on patrol. For those with military experience, that point is usually reached after finishing the law education (Miranda, Terry, Mapp, Carroll, Whren, Chimel, Garner, etc.) and the SKILLS classes necessary for fulfilling the role of a police officer. (Handcuffing, de-escalation techniques, felony stop training, traffic stop training, etc.) For the academy kids, they ride-along until they finish the academy and SKILLS, and then a little further to make sure that this is what they want to do for a living. For the degree kids, they do a ride-along at some point during their education, then ride-along with their agency they’ve applied to while they get SKILLS training. Interdepartmental transfers will do a ride-along while getting the required education as has been mentioned numerous times already, then allowed on the road to patrol in a similar manner as the academy and college kids. When they’re ready is also highly subjective.

A neat side-note pertaining to dispatch, when a female officer is pregnant and is reaching the point where her pregnancy may be in jeopardy she is offered a desk job for the remainder of her pregnancy or she can work dispatch. After giving birth and after her maternity leave is up, she can then resume patrol duty.

For a fun reading time, one could take some time to read about a few cases. The first time I read Tennessee v. Garner, was probably the first time police movies started to lose their appeal for me. After all my training was done, I couldn’t watch any cop movie because they always did things wrong. If it isn’t the procedure or the actions taken during something as simple as a traffic stop, then it is the law aspect of it. And do NOT get me started on Blue Bloods. That show is all kinds of wrong from the law enforcement perspective.

And off she goes to fix it. Fix fix fix. Fix fix fix. SmolPirate is now SmolHandywoman.

Titles are not copyrighted. If the title in question is trademarked ™ then yes, it would need to be changed or one would have to ask for permission to use it as a title in a different work. A title can’t be trademarked unless it is part of a series. This means that SmolPirate is safe from copyright and trademark law. At least as far as the US copyright and trademark laws are concerned. I don’t think it would be too much different internationally, so she should be good.

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Lesson time! Now i just gotta incorporate all of this into the game.
Thank you :T

All pirates are handy! :black_flag: :skull::hammer_and_wrench:

Great then, I’m safe :smiley:
Thanks for clearing that out friend!

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I’ve done a bit of research on this and I assume it’s “on” since"in" means inside something or with limitations. While “on” means on a surface or something. But correct me if I’m wrong.

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Definitely a RO :smiley:
And thank you very much! I will do my best in every character.

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Language is an abstract matter but you can rationalize it a bit

When you hold something with your hand, you’re grabbing it with the "in"side of your hand (your palm) and not laying it “on” anything. Therefore, we say something is in our hands not on them.

On a side note, on hand is a phrasal expression that exists but it’s just not used to indicate holding something

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Olay gotcha! Thank you very much for clearing that out :blush:
I will go into fixing that then…

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A small thing:
Can you change the order of the options when you confirm your name, so that the “that’s correct” is on top? That way, players can play trough faster.
The “obviously” part of the gender-selection options might be a bit offensive to genderqueer people? HG isn’t as strict on that as CoG though.

Grammatical suggestions:
Maybe your mother was against it, but your father had a totally opposite attitude. He was a police officer, so he was a source of support and inspiration.
Widen his eyes
I wanted
Standing in a throne- this is weird since a throne is a chair. Standing in a chair would be weird.
I wanted that power

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Thank you for the kind suggestions, i will see through this. Hopefully, you’re enjoying the game :smile:

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I LOVEEE THIS GAME!! Honestly it’s kinda refreshing to get a game focused on romance with a lil action in between. Raven is definitely intriguing :joy::joy: but at the same time Serena is soooo sweet. I cannot wait for any future updates! Good luck from one author to another :joy::joy:

I’m really glad you’re enjoying it so much and I couldn’t agree more in having more romance focused games.
I am doing my best writing chapter two but it is taking a while, I promise it will be worth it!
Thank you so much, your comment means a lot to me :heart:

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This seems interesting, but I’m having difficulty reading it.

When you start a new line of dialogue, you should create a new paragraph. Otherwise, it’s hard to tell who is speaking.

f.x.
This is confusing:

“Tommy won’t like that,” Sue said. “It’ll make him angry.” “You really think so?” Rob asked. “Yes,” she replied.

This is not:
“Tommy won’t like that,” Sue said. “It’ll make him angry.”

“You really think so?” Rob asked.

“Yes,” she replied.

It’s much easier to read and understand. If it’s all together in one paragraph, I don’t that a different character has started speaking, and I have to go back and try to figure out who’s saying what, which is frustrating as a reader, especially since the story itself seems charming.

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I agree with @Hannah_Minger. It was especially a problem during the ‘pineapple pizza’ scene, since Raven’s hilarious comments are bundled in with whatever Ricky says. It dampens the comedic effect.

Also, describing Raven’s hair as “midnight” seems a little overly flowery.

That being said, this is an enjoyable game so far. The intro pulls you in, and the character is a believably fallible, less-than-rational human (for example, daydreaming about marrying Serena is the kind of goofy, illogical thing some of us have done).