First time I’ve read through this wip and I have got to say that was both sickeningly sweet and absolutely heart-wrenching. Like God damn, you are on to something here Sophia. I am all aboard the Melissa-train, even if it is just my conniving mother’s machinations
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I named mine Callen.
Wilhelm. Because German.
Let see the meaning of the name(according to Google)…
Gentle
Who is he?
Welcome to Team Melissa then
Powerful in battle
will, determination
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Ooh, that’s awesome. Geralt is the witcher.
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Ah I see, because when I search that it’s result is one of knight in Arthurian legend, which I doubt it’s what @No_This_Is_Patrick mean
When I search name Karlos, it’s name mean “Free Man”, seems really suiting to his personality
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my main MC is called Maximum while the 2nd is called Machiavelli.
Nice. I don’t really go by meaning when choosing names, just by feel. If it feels right, then we’re good.
I don’t know. I played Wolfenstein: the New Order a while ago and the name
Wilhelm just kind of stuck so now it goes on everything as a last name or
whenever I play as a male, as a first name
Seven7h
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“Greatest”
I know where you get that from but I search it nonetheless, and it’s meaning is “battle, fight”
I just found name meaning is fascinating since it’s like putting hope to to the one that get the name
It’s result some German figure when I search it
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I did it! I finished spell checking the game 
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Congratulations, must be eyes tiring. Is there many mistake though?
Ehh, see for yourself. I’m about to post my report xD
@Sophia @Vattena Here it is. This should be all.
Summary
gatehouse in the advent that the castle needed to be shut off
In the event.
The beauty of the castle did not stop at the walls, Darius wished to continue his theme of peace within the grounds itself,
Period after walls and itself.
barracks where the guardsmen stayed.
Where the guardsmen would stay, or where the guardsmen slept.
at the top of the barrack roof.
‘In the roof’ might be better.
Finally, near the forge was the castle kitchens.
Were the castle kitchens.
The fountain was made from marble brought in
Made of
The ground is covered in grass with many flowers that have various colors, although not as many as the garden. Guards and servants walk by the stone path that has a fair amount of tree each side.
PT. (Was, had, walked, had)
You leave her alone and played by yourself
Play by yourself.
He wears a black armor,
No a in that sentence
His scar across his face was intimidating,
The scar.
You still stand between your legs
I think you were reaching for ‘with your tail between your legs’, but it’s not necessary. Just leave it at ‘You still stand shivering in fear.’
employ more than one of these with any given movement.
At any given moment.
A character who wears light armor facing a more
I think you meant ‘A person who wears light armor’
binding has its uses; for example, you are fighting in a confined space without
Might want to use a period instead of the semi-colon. And add an ‘if’ before ‘you are’
Unless you are confident of your speed
Confident in your speed…
If skies are blue, our love is tender - two people living in the sun.
I don’t know if this is how you meant this, since it’s poetry, but I think you meant ‘two people loving in the sun’
You see another set of books interesting to read.
‘Another set of books that look interesting to read.’
hid it for the mortals to never suffer anymore and for anyone who seeked to aquire these for evil intentions.
'…So the mortals would never suffer, and so anyone who sought to acquire these with evil intentions would not find them.
- King Alain I the wise one.*
I think that ‘The Wise One’ goes in caps, since it’s part of his title.
Some may say he’s too naive,
Some may have said he was too naive
which was passed down by generation to generation.
‘By’ is not necessary there.
It was given by the King when they first got married.
‘…Given to her by the King…’
Mess up with her bed.
‘With’ isn’t necessary there, either.
unacceptable thing, you’ll get an ear or a two.
‘An earful or two.’
the Duke would be occupied with his duties. I would like you to entertain her daughter
‘Will be occupied’ and ‘his daughter’
A place where there are full of bushes.
A place where there are full of rocks.
A place where there are full of flowers.
A place that is full of…
It is peaceful and quite
And quiet
You looked and see a girl collecting flowers.
Looked around and saw
royal garden can have you locked
Can get you locked
exact enchantment, and casted
And cast. I think you use ‘cast’ no matter the tense.
and saw your mother
And see
Melissa curtsies on the Queen
To the Queen.
asked questions to the Melissa, making her uncomfortable throughout the period of time.
‘asked Melissa questions making her uncomfortable the whole time’
Duke of Blanchard came afterwhile
After a while.
while leveling you arms
Your arms
Shutting one eye close your aim
No close goes in there. And 'you aim.
have become a real shock for her to know that her bestfriend
Have been a real shock for her to know that her best friend
You ran to the other side, and finally caught the glimpse
Caught a glimpse.
You felt relief at her smile
Feel relief
The flowers blooms
Bloom
developed into a woman
Woman’s
It came to a shock to
As a shock
The foods were already placed on the table, drinks were given
The food is placed, the drinks are given
for the last time, and went away.
And goes away.
Instead of arguing, they simply had a quiet conversation
Have a quiet conversation.
has strike midnight. The King rise and raise
‘Strikes midnight.’ Without ‘has’. ‘The King stands and raises…’
he looked surprised as much as you do. Your eyes met with Melissa, who covered her face, full of shock.
PT. (Looks, meet, covers) Also, ‘shocked speechless’ might work better than ‘full of shock’
fate turned the two
Turn
where my brother stands, every step she makes reminds me that she will be bound for life to my brother.
‘Your brother’, ‘step she takes’, ‘reminds you’, ‘your brother’
caught the Melissa’s eyes.
‘Catch Melissa’s eyes.’
couldn’t forget her look
‘Can’t forget her face’ or ‘the way she looked’
Melissa kissed Prince Marxus, thus bounding
Kisses, binding.
You remembered the kiss you shared
Remember
You participated a magic aptitude test.
You participated the Grand Hunt of Duke Jerome.
Participated in
convinced all the people in your theory.
Of your theory.
caught your interest and participated in it.
And you participated in it.
regarding on politics. You learned a lot of things happening
No ‘on’ after ‘regarding’. ‘…A lot things about what’s happening…’
hunting with fellow nobles, and attending his duties as king.
With his fellow nobles, and attending to his duties…
see your father sitting on his desk. He has grown a beard like most kings had. King Andus looks at a couple of documents sitting on his desk. He sees you, and signals you come near him.
“You asked for me, father?”
“Come closer.” He says, and you took a few steps toward him. “Have you heard of the problems arising in the kingdom?” King Andus asks.
PT. (saw, had, did instead of had, looked, saw, signaled, said, asked)
King Andus looks at you
Looked
You asked, fearing something horrible about to happ
PrT. (ask)
You loved her before, but your feelings has died out.
Have died out
You didn’t felt attracted
Didn’t feel attracted.
and bound thy
Bind thee
I hope that this marriage would come fruit into something
I think you mean ‘come into fruition’ or ‘bear fruits’
Melissa, How have you been?
No cap H in how
The Feast Has ended.
Same, no cap h.
that you managed to talk through with her
To get through to her.
words thank you.[i/]
The italic code snuck in there xD
You are out in her room.
Ouside her room
that… Vicious princess
I don’t think the cap v should be there
and sent your farewells to her.
Gave your farewells
has been busy so busy
Period after the first ‘busy’
- Sophia sees you coming*
Saw
She rolls her eyes on you
Rolled, at you
he wears a plate armor that defines
Wore, defined
That person a woman, an extremely attractive one.
Was a woman
The knight states
Stated
I’m sorry my prince
Capital P in prince
The king did that?"
Same as before
You asked him.
Ask
tapestries beside fireplace was lit
Feels like you skipped a part of the sentence. You were going to say where the tapestries were, or what they were like, before you jumped to the fireplace.
until the diners
Dinners, if you mean the people who are going to eat, maybe ‘the guests’ or ‘the royals’ or something similar would be clearer.
She did swore to protect you, didn’t she?
Swear
You drank all the water
Drink
Her beautiful, green eyes look at you with shock and horror
I think you meant blue eyes
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My eyes are tired and it’s 3am. I’ve got church at 10.I’m going to 
I just checked it and I think you right mostly, I still not understand English that far though. But good job, many that I should see but not there(probably because I see the code instead), I glad you check it (and no need to tag me, just tag her I probably going to see it anyway and maybe read it when thread in peace)
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I figure you should get a look at them too, as Sophia’s Right Hand xD Besides, you do this much more often than I do. That way we can hold a grammar council 
“Grammar Council” on serious note, it does needed
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Yeah. If you or Sophia need nitpicking-at-grammar help, I’m here anytime. Anyway, sweet dreams. I’m going to sleep. By the time I come back from church you’ll be sleeping, so see you soon. Don’t work too hard.
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Nah I just doing forum exploring now, hope you have good sleep 
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