Hunters: Born of Blood (WIP) (Update 20/10/23)

Hunters: Born of Blood

Everyone always told you that monsters didn’t exist, that your nightmares couldn’t hurt you. They weren’t real, you believed that. Or, at least, you did… until your nightmares entered the waking world and tore apart everything that mattered.

Now you know the truth.

Entering a world both new and yet disturbingly familiar, you realise that the shadows might just be holding monsters after all. So you’re trained to fight, to kill, to pursue the horrors that once haunted your dreams.

All the whilst hiding the fact that you might just be one of the very things you’ve been trained to hunt…

Features:

  • Play as male, female or non-binary
  • Embrace or reject your growing powers that you struggle to understand.
  • Hunt down Aberrations from other worlds.
  • Do whatever it takes to get your revenge on the man that ripped your family apart, or learn to let go.
  • Have your emotions rule you as you struggle to cling on to your sanity, or let the world tear them away completely.
  • Romance a sorceress, vampires or other humans and choose where your loyalty lies.
Warnings

Contains violence, death, swearing, reference of child abuse (not the MC)
Trigger warning - The MC witnesses the death of their parents
This story can get relatively dark with the MC being traumatised through the events of their life- but you can control how far they potentially fall/recover.

Romance Options

There are currently 3 male and 3 female options available for any MC:

  • (F) Tara Russo - Sorceress
  • (M) Alex Fraser - Human
  • (F) Ashley Conaway - Vampire
  • (M) Isaac Conaway - Human
  • (F) Skylar Coleman - Human
  • (M) Lawrence Blakewell - Vampire

I’m hesitant right now to add anymore details, but I can potentially add them in if that’s what people prefer.

Demo: https://dashingdon.com/play/aj/hunters-born-of-blood/mygame/
Currently the demo includes the prologue which contains roughly 11600 words and an average 6500 on a single play through. The prologue covers the MC’s childhood and Chapter One will contain the lead up to joining the Hunters.

I’m worried the prologue might feel rushed, since it goes through the years relatively quickly - but I also don’t want to spend too long there so I’d love peoples thoughts on it! Any feedback in general would be greatly appreciated - grammar, flow, errors, suggestions or choices you might want, if this is even a good idea, etc,

Thank you for your time! :blush:

Updates:
20/10/23
Chapter one has been added standing at around 23.5k words taking the total to about 35k with an average of 15.5k per play through. A few small edits have also been made to the prologue. Chapter one covers the immediate aftermath leading on from the prologue and basically covers the MC’s introduction to the Hunters.
It might be a bit messy at the beginning due to the amount of code jumping that goes on so please let me know if something doesn’t feel right for your character/you feel there’s a choice you want to make that’s not available :slight_smile:

324 Likes

This super interesting! I really like it so far :slight_smile:

5 Likes

This is interesting so far. I liked how many options we’re given regarding how the PC acts, it helped solidify them a bit more in my mind.

In my opinion, the prologue didn’t feel rushed. It’s nice as it is, as it allows us to dive into the main story sooner, which is presumedly what most will look forward to playing. There’s always the other side of the coin, and one could say that exploring a bit more of the PCs childhood could help build their character and make players more attached to playing as them. Maybe we could have some short flashbacks at a later date to make up for it, if it ends up feeling necessary. Well, to be honest, either a longer prologue or as it is, is fine by me, as I both like slower-paced stories as well as those that just dive right into the meat of it.

Anyways, thanks for sharing this story. Hope to see more of it :))

14 Likes

i’m intrigued so far, its pretty short but interesting. I;m curious to see where this story goes

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Thank you both so much!

@Rock Thank you! It can be hard to tell after staring at your own writing for so long so I really appreciate the feedback - I feel like flashbacks could potentially work, definitely something to consider for later.

Thanks again :blush:

4 Likes

I found the pacing to be fine, the way it flows currently.

The thing I recommend doing to help the rhythm of the story is to signal the jumps in time better. Currently, the transitions from one to the next seem a bit inconsistent to me.

Perhaps it is this that causes you pause?

I felt that a “stoic” type of choice for the different “how do you feel” choices would work well … perhaps they were there, but I did not realize that.

This is a good start, and I look forward to more of your writing.

1 Like

This is goddamn good. I was mad as hell when the demo ended, I wanted more! I’ll definitely be keeping an eye on this baby, you have my complete attention :saluting_face:

6 Likes

Sounds interesting

2 Likes

Okay, I just read this demo and I immediately loved the prologue. I think it’s written well. The choice where the MC can’t really ‘connect’ with other people is interesting. It put an emphasis on how the nightmares changed the MC’s mind as a growing child.

Or maybe it’s just my MC. Haha
Anyway, keep it up, dear author!

1 Like

I think you could be right there - at one point I changed the transitions so it had the passage of time at the top of the page in bold - then I scrapped it but maybe something like that would be less jarring?

Thanks I’ll have a look through and see what I can do! I did try and add more ‘stoic’ choices when I could but I can see a couple of places where they’re missing/maybe not so clear :slight_smile:

Thank you for trying it out!

@Facepalmcity Thank you so much I’m glad you enjoyed it!
@Harley_Robin_Evans Thanks :blush:

@Ashi Thank you! Yeah unfortunately the MC really has had it rough and that feeling of disconnect from everyone else will be a part of why they end up joining the Hunters

6 Likes

I think you’ve almost pretty much nailed the prologue, managed to make me care a lot about both the mc and the mother with so few interactions it almost made me feel a little silly at the end. It’s short but somehow still very impactful. And perhaps the interaction between the mc and mc’s mother at school depends on my choices there but I think that part specifically was extremely well written and very efficient character development.
The only criticism I would have is the part where you swap pov to the two girls, a bit jarring, maybe I missed something that makes it more relevant than I perceived it to be, but it just felt out of place in the moment at least.
Overall loved it and I’m very curious to see where you take this :blush:

2 Likes

Jist gotta say…

django-attention-curiousity

6 Likes

@Mercz94 @Thanatos Thank you both for playing, I’m so happy you liked it! :blush:

I’m genuinely so glad you think so, I really wasn’t sure if people would care what with doing a short prologue so it’s a relief to know at least one person did. :laughing:

She’s the girl from the MC’s dreams/nightmares if that helps? It’s meant to lightly link in with one of the earlier nightmares the MC had and introduce one of the ROs a bit more - but if it doesn’t work I can look at maybe changing it up somehow :thinking:

Thanks so much for the feedback!

8 Likes

I got a question. Is the powers we get something we can choose or something that’s predetermined? And if it’s the latter, then what is it?

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Soo good so far, cant wait for more
And i am interisting to see the MC hidden powers

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Pretty interesting, writing was ok but its too early and short to judge for now.

I personally would have put the “childhood” segments as a flashback in future chapters and start with in the middle of the action from the get go.

1 Like

Sorry for the late reply I’ve been on holiday!

They’re predetermined, I guess if I were to generalise them then the MC basically has ‘psychic’ powers which has currently been seeing glimpses of the past/future. You’ll be able to decide how much you want to explore and develop them in the future.

@Bretayal837 Thank you for playing I’m glad you liked it!

@Heartbreak Thanks for playing! At this stage I don’t think I’ll be switching the prologue around - but any further childhood memories will happen in flashbacks.

8 Likes

I really enjoyed this. I loved the pacing and I really look forward to developing the MC’s powers as the story progresses.

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Thanks so much I’m really glad you enjoyed it :blush:

3 Likes

This is a grand tragedy, how could it end so soon!!! Absolutely love what was offered in the demo and I’m greatly saddened that I finished it! Keep up the amazingly terrific work!

1 Like