How would you feel about an abusive RO?

doubtful . I mean , I personally said…I wouldn’t go near such a story .

The upsetting part would be if an author go out of his way , do no research and then try to turn ‘abuse’ to either ‘sexy thing’ or write it in a disgusting way that it’s a fun consensual thing . Or the victim ‘earned’ that one .

But boycotte ? nah .

it’s better to educate then to tear down . Unless the student is a bragging culprit…then , all bets are off :smirk:

By boycott I simply meant that they’d refuse to purchase the game or support the author.

Sincerely calling boycott. Not buying a game that represents absolutely all i despite in modern industry is stupid. I of course don’t buy something will cause me psychological distress … Lol. That is not boycott is called free market.

and anyone who write a story , know the risk right ? it will either soar high or fall flat .

I don’t think the word boycott fit in here . Making it sound like peoples who don’t like such a thing , are doing it out of malice .

wich isn’t the case .

I tried Mass murder but couldn’t get far due to trigger . I stopped and wrote to the author telling him so , and wished him the best .

It’s not for everyone and that is fine .

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Definition of boycott

boycotted; boycotting; boycotts

: to engage in a concerted refusal to have dealings with (a person, a store, an organization, etc.) usually to express disapproval or to force acceptance of certain conditions

In this case I meant it as expressing severe disapproval. It definitely works there and is a word I’ve used to describe my own refusal to purchase products in the past, though if you don’t like it it could be substituted with many other words. I don’t blame anyone for not supporting something they feel is wrong. Quite the opposite, I think that’s exactly what people should do.

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TRYING TO FORCE ACCEPTANCE…i don’t try to force anything. I just simply don’t buy something i don’t like. I don’t want they change a comma.
Boycott implies trying actively changing and erase something.

If i don’t buy an apple because i don’t like apples ai am not boycotting Apple farmers

I still think it doesn’t fit . Why ? because said author can write something else , and peoples would love it . They just won’t play X story cose of their own personal taste and reasons .

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@Punchysporkk For what it’s worth, I think you’re using the word boycott correctly. About the above, I’d like to just point out again that I think this thread’s concerns encompass far more than using games as escapism and wanting to avoid being surprised by or even reading misery and suffering. I know that’s one reason that has been mentioned here, but I really feel like the overwhelming majority of concerns here are more complex. People aren’t shying away from “realism” or wanting to escape: there are legitimate concerns about the greater ramifications of clumsily writing about abuse “just because” it’s different or “more real,” (which I strongly disagree with as well).

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Notably, badly handled abuse would run afoul of our “Grossly Offensive” guideline, and would not be published.

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Boycott seems like a bit much. You’d have no obligation to play if you don’t want to. This isn’t personally for me, but it’s also within my ability to simply just not touch it.

I think if the idea is to protest and boycott simply out of disagreement, it gets to easy to do it for more things, regardless of the severity. I don’t feel like just not agreeing with something is a good enough or even necessarily an actually valid reason to try and create a mob mentality over it.

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I only can say that Cog staff has been very supportive and banning many gross or anti equality posts and wips . So I will nevwr boycott anything. But of course if something i don’t like i won’t buy it.

Going back to the point above about escapism vs. realism: you can absolutely write real-world issues in a way that is still realistic but allows enough separation to not be triggering.

I write a rather serious assault in Ch. 1 my IF, where the PC’s RO can be attacked by an NPC viciously if the PC doesn’t de-escalate a confrontation. The assault is handled very seriously and there’s a whole section dedicated to checking on the RO after the attack (with several more sections planned for the next few chapters). If you want to strive for realism when it comes to harmful situations, make the results and character behaviors realistic. For example, if the player chooses not to check on the RO after the assault, there’s a huge drop in their relationship. But checking on them only affords a small boost because they’re still so close to the situation that they’re recovering from. (Also note that the assault occurs in a context [apocalypse] in which violence overall is more common)

Point blank, if you plan to write abuse in any capacity, writing it incorrectly is just extremely irresponsible and damaging to people who have been abused and anyone in an abusive relationship who doesn’t realize it.

When talking about the abuse fetish, please please please please please do not write an abuse fetish unless you research it thoroughly. I’m serious. This shit is not just simply “ha ha kinky stuff lol,” it can get really dark and serious and if it’s not incredibly obvious that it’s consensual through the way you’ve written it, you need to stop writing and research it more.

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I’ve clarified about my word usage and my feelings. I provided a definition. I’ve changed the word in my original post. I said absolutely nothing about starting a protest or riling a mob. It’s just how I talk guys, work with me. Please stop assuming I meant something sinister.

@rinari Thanks for the word choice support. As I said, there are serious concerns with this subject. I don’t feel sufficiently versed in them to be comfortable discussing the more sensitive ones, but I do understand desiring an escape with fiction so that’s the part that I chose to address. I agree that it would have to be very carefully handled (and not used for shock value), but I feel like the right person (preferably someone who’d experienced it first hand) could write something very impactful that could help people understand better and connect more to the issue. I definitely wasn’t trying to minimize the other issues being discussed, I’d just rather do the reading than the talking on those.

@RETowers For this reason I’m less worried than I’d otherwise be. I have a lot of faith in this company.

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@Punchysporkk That makes sense: I didn’t think that’s what you meant specifically (about realism/escapism) but I just wanted to re-re-reiterate for anyone reading the thread who felt that way (that those who would be against the concept are simply because they can’t “handle” something that happens in real life)! I agree too that really any subject can be broached in fiction–especially by the right people and writers–but that scrutiny and examination of their intent and execution must be applied.

I really think “boycotting” can be used colloquially as synonymous with “not buying a product because you don’t like or agree with it or it’s not to your personal tastes,” not a political movement meant to damage someone–but let’s all move on from that topic and agree that it’s just a difference in usage!

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Well, if you mean ‘don’t like don’t play’, say it. Using ‘boycott’ in its place makes you sound as if you insist the company publishes truly despicable games and no one bats and eye. And that people who ‘don’t like’ it are the ‘bad guys’ for ‘not liking it’, not the people wanking off to hurting, insulting, degrading, manipulating and generally harming people for one’s own ego/out of one’s own issues that one thinks are no big deal/don’t need treatment/can’t be helped. (hey, several people have already stated it’s their ‘kink’)
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Okay, good, I just wanted to make sure. :sweat_smile:

That was what I meant by this thread making me think. The idea I’m working on would probably involve some rough moments in a rough world, but I’ve been unsure exactly what situations I want to include. Now I’m asking myself whether this or that would serve a greater story purpose or just be there to showcase the brutality of the world- and if that’s a good enough excuse. It’s difficult to know where to draw the lines, but I feel like I have a better idea now.

And yes, “boycott” is correct in the way I used it, but I will make a mental note in the future to take care when using it- particularly on a forum with people from so many different parts of the world!

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The answer is no.
When the question is what it is here, the answer is no.

Can you bring up the topics? Sure. Should you let the player carry them out, and/or (worse) leave those scenes as they are?

the thread stated before how a ‘abuse bad’ statement at the end won’t do, because it ridicules the people who have went through it.

And you kinda use boycott in a way to shift the blame on people you as author would be alienating and insulting…

Funny, that is something that constitutes as abuse.

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I myself having experienced abuse in real life wouldn’t mind to see it in CoG games, as long as it’s not romanticised and there’s a trigger warning at the beginning. Also, I wouldn’t mind having the option to be an abuser either, as long as there are consequences.

I’m all for being realistic and authentic (maybe tweak that a bit so the abuser doesn’t get away with everything), plus I think many of us play characters they find morally despicable at times. I certainly do.

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Just thought I’d throw my two-cents in…

Having grown up in an abusive household, and watching my mother be verbally, mentally, and emotionally abused in my early years I hate nothing more than when the media romanticises this… It makes me sick to my stomach actually. Knowing that what I went through, and my mother, to some could be seen as desirable… I don’t mean to sound like a bitch, but honestly please don’t.

Although I’ve been away from that situation for almost 5 years now it has still left scars which I’m still struggling with through therapy and medication. And I regret nothing more than letting him take away my teenage years. I sat locked inside my room and pushed everyone away, and now when people ask about funny teenage stories I’ll have nothing to say because I never properly experienced my teenage years. I threw them away. I lost myself because of abuse.

However, there is one extreme situation I would be ok with having an abusive RO - only if it were to showcase how not ok these behaviours were, and how destructive abuse can be. Abusive love interests shouldn’t be rewarded for acting like a monster…

Oops, gotta little too deep there so -insert stupid cat meme here-

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I wonder what type of abuse. Thanks actually a problem when I’m trying to write characters with a bad backstory. My go-to is the unforgivable kind of abuse. But I’m sure there are plenty of fathers who only slap or smack their daughters and not go to the unforgivable place. And smacking around and molestation aren’t the only kinds of abuse out there. What ROs could be considered abusive in any degree in fiction. Not Just the extreme " you walked into a door knob" type.

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