Golden: Book One - [Updated 8th July 2023]

Same i feel you girl. I too am a college student so late night studies and deadlines for submission are not uncommon to me. Plus the Covid-19 making it worse but still congrats.

#"Sorry," I begin. "I clearly didn't have the money to buy a watch." I say jokingly.

I read this as more of a self depreacating quip, didn’t realise it’d increase snob.

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It’s choices like those why the snobbish stat has been added in. The MC has a lot of money, so saying they can’t buy a watch is a sarcastic, snobbish remark - that’s how I saw it when I wrote it, anyway.

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Hm, I might’ve imagined the MC as overly complex, then. An MC stressed by their own privelege and the imposter syndrome and inadequacy that comes with it might comment on their privelege in a jokingly self deprecating way. Thought I suppose that’s outwardly a snobbish attitude as well?

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Hm, I suppose. Though, the decision on how the MC feels about their privilege and other aspects of their rich lifestyle comes in later chapters - that hasn’t been established at the time of that particular choice.

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Ahhh! I can’t wait to start reading this on the bus trip into work. Here’s to hoping that your writing doesn’t suck me in so much that I end up missing my stop.

6 months is a worthy wait!

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All right finally read all the routes! Thank you for the extra save slots! I really liked how you made the elemental guy meeting with the team longer; I felt like it showed us more of their personalities than the previous scene :3

Typo Report


Kinda felt like there’s some words missing? Could be wrong though

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My playthrough was an incredibly enjoyable experience that was well worth the wait. And I’m not joking around. This was some angsty business.

Your characters are very interesting too. The way that I see it, none of them seem to fit snug into a trope. They’re rather flawed, callous and kind of detached in their own ways—but it makes perfect sense because they live different lives. They’re not like the general public and they seem to just need one another and feed off of each other’s behaviours and banter.

I just found that fascinating.

However, that cliffhanger was honestly criminal! My imagination is running rampant, haha. And there’s so much going on behind closed doors that it makes me feel bad for my MC. Which just goes to show how good your writing is because I hardly connect with a build, it’s usually just entertaining. Now I’m going to make a bratty asshole build just so I feel less horrible about MC’s circumstances and the blatant gaslighting.

(Also, the world must know that I would sell my kidney for Walter and Jared better give him that raise!)

Good luck with future writing as well as your studies.

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I’m super happy you enjoyed the update, and the team’s dynamic too! And not only them as a group, but them as individuals too!

Ah, yes, the cliffhanger was very fun to write :smiley: .

Hope you enjoy replaying the game. Thank you for your kind words and feedback.

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Thanks for your feedback!

Um, I didn’t really see that as a typo. It’s the MC telling P not to worry as buying a few flowers isn’t a problem. But, if it’s a little hard to read, then I can rephrase that.

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Thanks for the suggestion, I’ve made those changes to chapter three.

Though, asking the MC if they are ‘someone who uses makeup’ interrupts the flow of the story; instead I added a choice asking whether the MC would like to add makeup to their look without the implication that ‘there are times when the MC does wear makeup’.

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Another great WIP I found :star_struck: It promises to be really interesting story, I already love RO characters

Although, one thing I’m missing - more fields of study to choose. I wish my MC was more into science (like physics) or computer science…

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Glad you’re a fan of the ROs already!

I’ve mentioned this before, the first demo only had four degree choices, and in this demo I’ve added an extra one.

Alongside that, the degree choices play a big part throughout the series. I also have to write separate dialogue/choice options for all five degrees to accommodate for the one people have chosen - so, that’s a lot of writing and coding to do there already.

I also have to pick degree subjects that I know enough about to write about, if I have minimal knowledge on certain ones, then I realistically can’t write about them.

Apologies that there aren’t any STEM subject options, but it’s also the reason why I’ve added a science and technology stat for the MC too :slight_smile:

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Looks like I caught a repeat bug.

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Thanks for pointing that out! Which choice did you choose when speaking to Erin Donahue?

EDIT: I made a small coding change and replayed the chapter myself and didn’t get the bug, so let me know if you still see that.

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My ENTP MC will have to romance the INFP and be bffs with the ESTP, it is meant to be

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Golden - Book One

by milaswriting

Returning home to the big city of Lehsa should’ve been an easy task. Especially when your father is the mayor. Though, when you’re immersed in the city’s supernatural secrets, you endure problems university students your age can only dream of…
Please i want play this game full version :rofl::joy::sweat_smile:

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A little bit of feedback. Could the choice about wearing a hijab be incorporated in a slightly different manner, perhaps? It was a quite jarring to see this specific item being offered as headwear - and this item only. Maybe go with a question like: “Do you have anything covering your hair?” - and offer a selection of items?
(with a note that some of them will be hiding your hair completely, if that’s what you were going for with that choice)

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I’m struggling to see what the problem is, or what’s actually ‘jarring’ with having the choice written the way it is. I think having the choice as early on as it is allows the third chapter to flow rather well.

Are you talking about having other head wear such as hats, bandanas etc? If so, then I wouldn’t put the option of a hijab with the items mentioned above because a hijab is for religious purposes; not a fashion statement.

Having a hijab is a choice that isn’t usually in interactive fiction game, and one that adds inclusion in the game - like I said, I don’t see what the problem is.

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A hijab isn’t a fashion statement. That’s not an opinion, it’s just a fact.

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