Looking for Beta Readers--read most recent post! (WIP) Interstellar Airgap -- Steal the most secure data in the Universe!

Especially everything that relates to Duke is extremely weird and creepy…
That guy acts like a super strict super cop and super loyal to the Panwestia nation and when the chance comes to go to space he agreed to MC’s plan to betray the said nation without even literally half a second to think?!?

And like I mentioned (more like nagged) many many times in a female and/non-binary route flirting constantly with that guy is incredibly creepy…
Thought 'bout it a lot and if it does not heavily impact on the story you could make Duke the cop’s gender according MC’s (sexual) preference (doesn’t need to be introduced as Duke when met MC, instead with lastname) and then teasing and flirting wouldn’t be as creepy as now…

Lol Duke acting like a little kid when he got the chance to go to space with MC was cute, but at the same time- isn’t he like, super loyal to Panswestia? It’s kinda weird that he’d just throw his loyalty away at the oppurtunity to go with the MC…also is he a RO? kinda like him-too early to tell yet, but :stuck_out_tongue:

Yeah, the character design is that he’s a good guy at heart who got wrapped up in toxic masculinity and nationalism (in a very propagandist country). Over time through interactions with the player those walls are supposed to come down, but as currently written it happens too quickly to be believable

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That’s what I’m saying

Aren’t those flirting choices with Duke despite MC’s sexuality creepy to you?!?
I mean straight guy has flirting choices with Duke or Ceterosexual or Skoliosexual or Homosexual female MC is flirting with Duke too

Lol that’s an understatement…

Yeah, like I said it gives too plastic feeling and unrealistic…
If that Duke’s throwing away his loyality and super excited thing and flirting thing and MC and companion (those three inmates including MC) willingly allowing them to be thrown in a space jail, this will be gold
But still the writing very good

My own MC’s preferences have no bearing on whether flirting with Duke is serious, or not, since they’re an egotistical asshole who thinks they’re ‘too cute’ to be truly punished. To them, the flirting is the harmless joke it was always meant to be. :joy:

I don’t often get to play as that type of character in IF (when it makes sense to do so, anyway I do prefer being the sincere-sweet type more), so I’m glad I could cut loose a little. This WIP is a fun delight to read through. :grin:

In the future, will u do longer text pages? , its a bit uncomfortable to read 2 very short paragraphs and be clicking all the time “next”

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Sure! I generally like shorter pages as a reader when the pacing is appropriate, but I understand that it’s not giving you an enjoyable experience. It’s been a busy week for me but I should have another chapter out by tomorrow night. I’ll see about a second version with longer pages. Thank you so much for the feedback!

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Chapter 6 is live! Longer pages and… well, i’ll level with you: Stats still don’t work. But that’s okay, I’ll fix it in the rewrite. Let me know what you think!

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I’ve tried to make longer pages beginning in Ch. 06 but i don’t think it’s going to be fixed in the chapters prior to that until the rewirte, just fyi

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Stuff


Oof! I disabled it to run quicktest and then didn’t re-enable. Sorry! I’ll fix that after work, along with the typo (thanks!)

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Hey ! It’s okay ^^

I didn’t want to sound rude
I have read my comment and it looks like I’m angry (of course, I’m not)
I’m really really sorry if u felt it in that way :pray::sob::disappointed:

c325886492aa82aa0b30ecbacdd1e8c1 7478946

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No worries! I really appreciate feedback of all kinds, and yours was both unique and polite :slight_smile: Thank you very much.

…Not like @Empress_Nightmare yelling at me every 3 posts (jk jk jk! I appreciate that too!)

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Fixed the typo, fixed the saves, Chapter 6 is (really, actually) live this time! Working on Chapter 7 now :slight_smile:

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Lol I just like this story :smile_cat::smirk_cat::roll_eyes:

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Oi @SpokesWriter when robbing the bank MC gets a chance to stay instead of hiding and get some money, but that 3500$ or so money is not added to the stats, it still says 0.

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:joy::joy: Lol

Thanks, now I’m fine, I was worried that my comment was rude :face_with_hand_over_mouth::face_with_hand_over_mouth:

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Maybe it was flavor text because of my choices, but it was nice to see cops/cop-adjacents not being romanticized and much the opposite. :star_struck: I really liked “Score of a Lifetime”, and I’m really enjoying this so far! Only one issue I came across—I chose not to include Janelle but she seemed in on the plan anyway.

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I knew SOMEBODY had to have! Lol. This is basically the book I was trying to write when I started Score, I just didn’t have the programming chops or patience to complete it.

Thanks again for the kind words and the bug report, I’ll look into it.

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What the hells do ya mean by THAT?!?lol Score of a Lifetime is very good albeit being a bit short and rushed, but you said it yourself that that was your first one. :smirk_cat::smile_cat::yum:

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