BREACH - Crime Thriller WIP (UPDATED! 29-November-2018!) (800k+ Word)

nonbinary-inclusive
gender-choice
comedy
young-adult-fiction

#3266

Wow, thank you very much! :smile:

Thank you for playing the game! And yes, Rook and Bishop really are in a league of their own. They seem to always have their own adventure whilst the MC are with their crew and the trio… I sometimes wish I had time to actually write a story just about the two of them.


#3267

Oh jolly! A new update!

Yes, new update, within the same month as the last update. It’s rather unnatural for me, but I’ve been focusing on work for the game lately and I’ve gotten some real progress!

So here’s hoping the train continues to roll with less writer blocks in the future! :sweat_smile:

UPDATED!

Breach: The Archangel Job (Updated)

DEVELOPMENT LOG#35 (29-November-2018) (Public Testing)

(3.O23.18.11.09)

  • Revised Chapter 3
  • Added more relationship advances for Michael and Raquel (Mostly in Chapter 3)
  • Made it easier for you to turn criminal in Chapter 4 after being found as an informant
  • Added more for Carly’s romance stuff in Chapter 4
  • Gabriel Nerfed (Chapter 3)
  • Rook is now able to defeat Gabriel in Chapter 3
  • Added a few more scenes with Raquel in Chapter 3
  • Added a few more scenes with Michael in Chapter 3
  • Added cheat codes! 8 Brand new cheat codes for you all to find and use!
  • Moved Rook’s second hangout to only be available after you finish your second heist
  • Made bleeding a little more dangerous. Check those health bars, people!
  • Fixed the dual wielding system from breaking everything you sell or unequip your secondary
  • Set base relationship to 50 (Again…)
  • Hayne now uses the Walther P99 (Previously uses the Glock 19 and 20)
  • Added the ability to bring small secondary weapons to hangouts
  • Added the ability to bring small melee weapons to hangouts
  • Added the ability to bring small body armours to hangouts
  • NOTE FOR TESTERS: The three features above is not yet finished. If you don’t mind, please go through the hangouts and let me know where you see an option to use any of the three equipments.
  • Cleaned up the menu (Previous menus will now only be available in the private testing)
  • Fixed Rook’s hangout (hopefully)
    COMPLETED: Cheasty doodle Doo - Cheat Codes (100%)
    W.I.P.: Cheats Galore! - More Cheat Codes (10%)
    W.I.P.: The Purge - Ellipsis (…) Massacre! (66%)
    W.I.P.: Kaz Hangout - First Romance (71%)
    W.I.P.: Chapter 4: The Big Bank (62%)
    W.I.P.: Gregory’s Glorious Goods - Part 2 (92%)

#3268

Damnit, you always update when I have to go to work…At least I have something to look forward to after going through hell for 8 hours.


#3269

Good luck!

… Also, @Thfphen110 I completely forgot to update your error reports. Damn it…

I was too fixated on looking through your assessment on Gabriel I completely forgot you also had some error reports I need to go through :laughing:

… I really need to hire someone for this if this game goes well.


#3270

Holy balls!! I had something I had to do today but NOPE!! Forget that!! :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


#3271

Don’t shirk anything important just to play an unfinished unpolished game! :wink:


#3272

Hey lads. Haven’t been able to catch a break yet… And finals are around the corner… I do have about three hours right now. Hopefully I’ll have more free time during Christmas break in order to do a full play-though.


#3273

I’m on vacation. Nothing is important this week.

Edit: Honestly, the last vacation I had that was not an extended weekend? 2005.


#3274
Summary

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nice.

Woohoo, the skip to chapter 1 option is a godsend

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Does this choice actually mean anything, aside from the money we receive?

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Perhaps a hyphen? No, just remove the space.

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Dramaception, eh?

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So this quote… I feel as if it matches the vigilante route more?

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Remove the space after respected.

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Literally me

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Didn’t we just… you know… kill 2 cops?

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Capitalize S? Yes? No?

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Period after giggles

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I do believe that the region is called New England.

Incongruent paragraph spacing?

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So, the a in anything shouldn’t be capitalized, as it doesn’t begin a new sentence.

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Why is lower framed by commas? If Anthony changes the way he says lower, maybe italicize it?

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So… I chose the prologue skip option. I recall there being a choice to saw the shotgun in the prologue. Maybe it’s the only viable option, as the old guy shoots us in the chest if we choose not to.

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Replace with clear/transparent, maybe

Oh, a joke I’ve come up with, intended for Anthony. The MC could say that we weren’t at the gas station. We couldn’t have been, as we were with this mother. A bit of juvenile humor for you. American humor, anyway.

The man? Anthony? I find it odd that he’s known as “the man” after we’re given his name.

Oh, I’m doing juuuuuust fine. I’m no good at dialogue, but I feel that this could be a cool choice. Maybe.

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Now, dialogue options like this… These are cool. I like these.

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Add period after first you.

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How about a 20 that makes all of the Officers’ guns jam?

That’s it. For a while anyway. I need a steak… And I need to study for finals… Until next time. I do hope my menial recommendations do some good.


#3275

Well then, it seems everyone’s having their finals this month. Good luck everyone!

It was already in the chapter skip option, but since I’m only allowing them for testing only (which you can unlock with a very easy cheat code, that will not be available at the end of the game)

For everyone who wishes to test the game by using cheats, you may do so by entering the code “sayplease” without the quotation marks which is available in the “Change Settings” option found at the start of every chapter.

Yes…

I know this is a problem… but with the time I have and with the fact that I have to re-write everything in chapter 1, I’ll ignore things…

This is due to the fact that double “*line_break” doesn’t have the same spacing as a paragraph break. and I can’t make paragraph breaks with so many codes in the way.

But also because I put 1 too many *line_breaks in that scene.

As it’s been written in the game, the chapter skip options isn’t very comprehensive and whether or not you’re injured the next day is randomized in the skip option.

It’s just a tool to skip the prologue without looking back at it, for people who just want to get to the next chapter.

… Maybe too juvenile, but then again, every joke in this game is either a childish joke, a dad joke, or a reference so obscure that only a mere handful percentage of people could understand it.

Coding error…

Though some are left ignored due to the fact that I’ll be re-writing the first chapter, most of them have been fixed and implemented!


#3276

“When did Kamakura period ended?”
1185.
Yep, I was asked about tests.

Good luck, people!

When will your finals end? Has it started yet?


#3277

Mine start in two weeks. There’s a reason my class got its study guides last week, as the workload is dreadful… I made the mistake of taking Bio II and Physics at the honors level at the same time. Anyone have finals horror stories?

Speaking of (kinda), what character had the top marks in school? What did they major in?


#3278

Well, I remember Bishop being one of the few people who were at the top of their class. I don’t remember what major he was in though.

Raquel was the top of her class in Veterinary Science.

And Anthony Reville was the top of his class in Criminal Psychology.

Though Gabriel has a degree in International relations, he was not at the top of his class.

Rook never went to college, and neither did Anna, Charlie, or Kaz.

Carly has a degree in Mechanical Engineering, but was not the top of her class.

Justin never finished high school.

Hayne never finished college in her Criminal Psychology major


#3279

I didn’t run into any new scenes or chances to advance anything with Raquel in chapter 3 (except the opportunity to try and figure out what she is signing) Are the advancements just very subtle or require very specific choices to see?


#3280

I did add more than a couple of new scenes, I’m not quite sure why they’re not appearing. But aside from that, most of the new advances are simply the addition of previously missing codes that will improve your relationship stats with Michael and Raquel. You probably won’t notice the difference in scenes, but the difference is seen mostly in your relationship stats.


#3281

I kinda miss Gabriel’s op ways. Its reminds me of one of those games where your leader is just super strong, something to look up to but suddenly they betray you,or in the case of you going detective, you betray them and it makes the final confrontation more worth wild. Apprentice becoming the master. But that’s just me. Also I return from grave bla bla bla same stuff I always say when I return from long periods of absence. Anything you want me to check out specifically?


#3282

To be honest, that was what I was going for, but after re-reading everything I saw Gabriel as unrealistically stubborn and at times even glorified. I do like to keep some my characters grounded, even though some of them are grounded in a tilted whole new level of reality, as contrast to the characters that are meant to be so different.

Not much besides the the hangouts, since I do plan on adding more options to use your secondary and maybe melee weapons during hangouts but I only laid out the groundwork for it but haven’t had the chance to use it.

(If your secondary and melee weapons are small enough, you should be prompted about whether or not you’d like to bring your weapons to the hangouts. But as of currently, you can’t use them since I haven’t gone through them and figured out which scene would work best to use said weapons)


#3283

I’m sorry I find this funny and laughed!

There were multiple of them, weren’t they? 25 or something…


#3284

I’m confused. Where are the cheat codes?


#3285

Definitely not that much :laughing:

Currently, the only thing avilable for testing is "sayplease" without the quotation marks