@adrao An option the sneak up on the reporter batman style both times you meet her would be cool. I also noticed that during the fight with the vampire some of the pronouns were incorrect. I like the additions of the fear manipulation though. There is something fairly satisfying about making hardened criminals run away crying like little girls.
@ClaimedMinotaur, I’ve added those options, thanks!
@peaches, thanks, corrected those! (and added you to the private beta)
I just posted another update. For those in the private thread it is now possible to ask more questions to a couple of the colleagues, plus corrected various bugs and added some suggestions. The game is now almost 210,000 words long.
Thanks for those, they will be corrected in next update! (will be posted in the next hour or two…)
To do list
-Place all powers chosen in the power choosing page, add possibility to clear and choose again. Add a number of pre-determined super-heroes (wolverine-type, etc)
-Add some more 5 point or 15 point “small powers” (thanks @Sempurus, post #409. For example, "I can identify enemy weak points (fighting +15), thanks Blank).
-Add possibility of port official trying to run away (fly, teleportation, water breathing to catch him, weapons dealer has a mercenary to fight). Possibility to turn them in.
-Add option for MC to invent a gadget? (high engineering and intelligence) High Frequency Blades, Railguns or Gauss rifles, sprays to stun,
-More choices of professions (student, scientist?). On the 4th day there should be difference (engineer called away to building, student going to lecture). Thanks @GenecoInheritor
-Re-write some of the dialogues for co-workers, to add flavour (a frequent complaint, so I need to work on this!). More interaction with them.
-Possibility to romance boss/Emily? to have a base?
-Mr Watson chapter part II and III (romance Catalina?), sidekicks billards bar (total 5 extra)
-Possible human genome storyline? (post #431)
-Have co-worker have a birthday party? (post #470)
-Change the definition of the MC (san-kyu, ni-kyu, depending on the number of hero points that they have)
-Dream between co-worker and secretary, make them break up?
-Side mission to properly romance the date from the masquerade
-Add side missions for villains
-Add engineering/biology checks to lower HP of enemies (aside from existing checks?)
-Drag in Mongolia part of the game. Should try to improve things there.
-Add extra options to read the mind of characters (under-developed power).
-Possibility of fight in Nepal route (needs some more work)
There’s a lot I really enjoyed about this story.
I liked how the MC can be a villain who accidently gained their powers and then accidently gained the reputation of a hero. It’s just the sort of amusing spanner in the works trope I enjoy. I also like how the MC can have power-hungry or bringing-peace motives just for the sake of those goals alone without any hidden or dark backstory.
I liked the normal day-to-day narrative of the story, including hanging out with co-workers and the issues at work. I actually find the side stuff and minor characters more interesting than the “main” narrative of confronting the Steel Aeronaut.
There’s a few typos or other things I saw – I wasn’t sure if they have already been pointed out since you have two threads and you mentioned you only regularly update the other one, but here they are:
All of these need punctuation marks at the end:
“Look, I’m no hero myself. But, I hate to see a comrade in such a mess”
Try to wrestle him to the ground, and apply a grappling hold to immobilize him
On your way to the underground station you notice that one of the newspapers has a large photo of you on the cover page, next to the headline “Police capture Black Cockroach, of Dark Protector”
“Things could indeed be better”
John tells you how apparently she was more relaxed before becoming a boss, but that responsibility seems to have changed her
(This is when you’re trying to get Catalina Gomez’ attention.)
“Sure thing. Thanks for the warning”
“A bunch of men are no match for the mighty Dark Protector”
Better to go home and take some rest. You have more important problems on your mind
Whoever is already on this can surely use some help. It’s my duty to protect people against any delinquents
Try to influence their emotions, instilling fear into them so that he runs away
(All the options when fighting the gang require punctuation.)
What an idiot. You cannot believe that he let himself be defeated by such a weak group of villains
(All the options when you’re considering the Italian superhero on TV require punctuation.)
“No plans for the weekend. But, you know, I’m sure something will come up”
“Thanks for asking. I’ve been too busy to think about the weekend yet”
“Wow. That’s a lot to take in”
“Just an old sprained ankle that is giving me a bit of trouble again. Nothing serious”
You are indeed correct in your findings"
“It’s been a long day, captain. If you’ll allow me, I’ll go home”
Even though I’ve met a number of people, there is no urgent need for me to influence their dreams
Other typos I noticed:
"G’Day!. You’re looking a bit dead today, mate.
"G’Day!. Wasting ya time again, mate?
"G’Day!. That really was some shouting!
I think the period after G’day! should be removed. I might have missed a g’day since he says it a lot.
A copy of the constitution.
The Teachings of Buddha .
Remove space between Buddha and the period.
As I said, you’re always welcome to come for a surf with me, any weekend!
I think the second comma should be removed.
"Ouch, yes, we’d better get back.
Needs quotation mark at the end.
"Real identity is unknown.
You might want to split the paragraph that starts with this line into two paragraphs.
You reassure her that everything is ok, and that you have enough money saved up. “Thanks so much, Erika. I knew I could count on you!”.
Remove period at the end.
Paying for all this would obviously be easier if you got a promotion, but given how Emily feels about you it looks difficult, unless you manage to write an amazing patent,
Is there something missing after the comma?
A few other things
During the lunch break with John, when I chose “There is something I’d like to ask you” a never-ending loading bar appeared.
“Eh… Thanks, Mrs. Dark Protector. Ah’ll tell ya everythin’ I know!”
I think Miss might be better here since it’d still be the equivalent of Mr.
This does not seem too out of place of the kind of dreams you would expect in somebody of serious’s character.
This was about the Steel Aeronaut’s graduation dream – I think this sentence needs to reworded completely.
She keeps maneuvering the armor around you, but not mater what sh does, you always prevail against her.
Should this be “but no matter what she does”?
“I’m glad you found me… saves my time!”
Should this be “saves me time”?
This one is incredibly minor, but on the stats page I noticed MC’s gender is capitalized (so it looks like “Gender: Female”), as are any powers listed, but everything else isn’t (like “Occupation: engineer” or under weapons, “bow”). It might be better to have all the descriptions capitalized for appearance – but like I said, it’s minor.
Also on the stats page, I noticed a few extra commas under Superhero Costume and Other:
_Superhero Costume: tight black white spandex top, tight spandex top, lace-up boots, domino mask, , _
Other: , sunglasses
Also, I like the idea of the battle groups at the end.
Thanks, corrected those! (I couldn’t find all, as I think I might have corrected them in a private thread, though I did correct all the others I could find).
Regarding the never-ending loading bar… not sure I can see the bug… is anybody else getting it?
By the way, in case anybody wants to follow updates I also have a facebook page:
Hey I was wondering if you could add the option to date the gun shop girl, I thin her name is Jen?
If I remember correctly, she is dating the gun shop guy - they are band-mates and lovers I believe.
Actually, it is possible to date either of them, if your relationship with them is high enough. You didn’t get this option? (I’m guessing you did buy some weapons and went to the concert the first time, etc?)
Yeah I just bought weapons and went to the concert, I’ll try harder this time. Also I’m having a bug where I can’t press the save button because it will freeze the game. Aside from that I love this and I’ve always wanted to make my own superhero!
Mmmm that’s odd… I’ll try to check. Is anybody else having the same problem?
I’m sorry, should I not buy the weapons? (I think I tried it, and I couldn’t go to the concert)
Also, is the only way to raise the Relationship stat is through the Dream manipulation?
I’m talking about Jen, of course.
Mmmm that’s odd… I don’t have time to check tonight, but it shouldn’t be the case. Buying weapons should increase relationship stat, and be invited to concert.
Did anybody succeed in RO Jen? If not I’ll check and see if there is a bug
I just uh…slept with her? And that’s it… couldn’t even visit her again.
Mmmmm yes that’s the end of that… You can invite her to the masquerade right? I’m hoping to code another RO option for after the masquerade, but haven’t gotten round to it yet…
Swooping in quickly to signal one thing:
*if ((((allow_armour_skin =1) and (spending_power_points >39)) and (power_armour =0)) and (armour_costume =1)) #My armor provides defense against heavy artillery (Dmg -40) 
*set power_armour 1
*set allow_armour_skin 0
*set armour_strength 60
*set armour_description “armour”
*set spending_power_points -60
Your set of armor provides you defense against heavy artillery fire.
60 should be 40.
Happy new year everybody! Hope this will be the year when this game gets published!!