Birth of a Superhero... or Villain? (finished re-write to allow villain path)

super-powers
gender-choice

#485

You didn’t go down the bank robbing scene yet?


#487

I have a world-building question: what are shiro-yukis powers we know none of her powers but always see her on TV this seems unrealistic
Also I would the choice to choose my apartment style and maybe have steel aerounat comment on that instead of just saying I love the way you decorated it


#488


Down should be dont


#489

@GenecoInheritor… thats a good point… the game would be super-hard, but hey, it might be possible to make it! I’m thinking that I might re-code the part, and make the text refer to the MC as an i-kyu, ni-kyu, san-kyu or yon-kyu, depending on the number of points spent… I might try to code that in a later update (I’m waiting to catch my next flight, but want to concentrate on moving the story forward during the flight).

@Blank, good point also. I’ve already got her in my head as she is going to make an appearance in one of the late game branches , but its true I never described her in the text. Will also modify that in a later update. Good idea also about the apartment, I’ll code that it also!


#490

I was just looking now at the results of the railroading part. It seems that many people feel the game is rather railroaded (which is the famous dilemma in all interactive fiction…).

Anyway, just wanted to know what do people feel are the worst moments of railroading (like, when you feel the game is really railroaded and some other choice should be possible… note that I cannot promise that I’ll implement any changes, but who knows?)


#491

Probably each time the steel aeronaut escapes also quick question did the same bodega get robbed twice if you go out on patrol?


#492

For starters, why must we start as heroes?


#493

Actually it’d be interesting to get some backstory for that. If DC universe Is anything to go by most people who suddenly get powers go into villainy.


#494

cose glowy rocks…are glowy lol


#495

Sorry about lack of replies and progress, end of term in Japan, so up to my neck with stuff… hopefully progress on the game will resume in August, during the summer break (who knows, maybe even early next week, depending on how much progress I make this week on marking, etc…). Anyway, last feedback was much appreciated, and I started to turn some stuff in my head about how to incorporate all the comments…


#496

When you enter their dream,is it possible to have a choice to give them a nightmare?
And in that first time the captain asks for help,is it possible to have a choice to not go at all?


#497

Figured out the nightmare part.


#498

Sorry for the long silence… in between one thing and another I have made no progress during the last few weeks, but I’m hoping to have some time to work from this next week, and make some decent progress! (I will also then start to reply to all comments on the public and private threads)


#499

Hey big fan of the book looking forward to it’s release. But I also got some critsium and recommendations.
First off I’m not a fan of the dialogue, it’s to straight forward. You have the I’m a dick and better then every one else line, the dismissive line of dialogue where your character just dosent care, and there’s the I’m supper humble and have no ego line. I personally think the game would do well to mix these up a bit, have sarcastic dialogue tree or a cocky nothing can take me down line. Right now it’s hard to play a character that’s not ether a dick, dismissive or meek.
And secondly, the games characters are some what un-interesting. Such as Charlotte, there’s just no charcter building to her. I have no clue who she is why she’s my friend and possible romantic interest. I think your book would benefit greatly from some character interaction or even just some background information.
And finally, the battles that you encounter are boring and anti climactic. There really just spam one attack that works and win. If I would offer my opinion on how these should be done, I’d recommend making them more narrative focus over game mechanic focus. Such as in other supper hero games such as the hero rise sires. In the game you chose a action you wish to take in the battle then based on your stats it tells you the result and effectiveness of the action. In my opinion it’s a far more engaging and interesting way to handle combat.
For the record these are just my opinions as a huge fan of choice script games and I’ve never actually tried to write anything like this in my life. Best of luck to yah bud :wink:


#500

The time bubble sounds like a good idea, I think of it like the powers from the game Quantum Break. The abilities in that game were amazing and executed so well. If this was implemented, it would be worth using this power.


#501

Thanks for the feedback, much appreciated! :slight_smile:

I’m planning a long reply to everybody tomorrow (I was working on the steel aeronauts base last couple of days, to try to move forward the story a bit…).

Tomorrow I’m planning to rework part of the first half. Could I ask you to give me examples of what you’d like your character to say at each dialogue? This would greatly help!

(Any other dialogue suggestions by anybody else are also welcome!)


#502

Still didn’t started on all the feedback (sorry, hopefully tomorrow…) but I continued working on the story. Quite pleased with having almost finished one branch of the game almost to the point that the MC reaches the Steel Aeronaut’s base, which is partially coded . The big achievement today is that the game as it stands is 145,000 words, which is longer than my first full game (Tokyo Wizard). So, it feels like a huge achievement already… maybe this will even turn out to be longer than Highway Wars, the way it is going…


#503

I still didn’t work on any of the feedback here. But, for those on the private thread I just uploaded a significant update, moving the Steel Aeronaut branch forward quite substantially. Otherwise, also adding everybody who made comments to the private thread.


#504

So…I’ve been on this sight for about a year now and this is the first time i have made an account and also commented.I am commenting to tell you @adrao that I love your game and would be interested in beta testing if you are still accepting people.


#505

I know it’s really, really late for me to comment on this, but why does the MC have job options at all? As far as I can tell, the differences are purely cosmetic, and have 0 influence on what occurs in the story, with the only job that seems to have any sort of effect is the engineer.

Wouldn’t it make more sense to have each job have an some sort of visible effect on the character? Like, as a journalist, you could affect how the population sees your hero persona; or as a lawyer, you’ll have an easier time reasoning your way out of things or, you know, using the law to your advantage, and maybe gaining extra points with the police?